6. The sex was "nothing crazy" and only in one position. (I know, I know. I'm sorry!)
I can definitely describe his junk perfectly, if I ever have to.
I think I can speak for all of us here when I say: NO THANK YOU!
When asked whether the sex was romantic, Daniels answered:
It was textbook generic. It wasn’t like, “Oh my God, I love you.” He wasn’t like Fabio or anything. He wasn’t trying to have, like, porn sex.
It was one position, what you would expect someone his age to do. It wasn’t bad. Don’t get me wrong.
My eyes. They are burning.
7. Trump didn't use protection.
The company I work for is condom-only. But I remember for a fact that we didn’t [use protection] because I’m allergic to latex. And I didn’t go up there with condoms on me. I know that for a fact because 99% of men don’t carry non-latex condoms on them, so I usually always have one in my backpack but I thought I was going to dinner, so I only had a tiny little cocktail purse.
8. Trump asked Daniels for an autograph.
He had one of my DVDs and he asked me to sign it for him and I did.
Sure. Sure. That is a 100 percent normal thing for someone to do.
9. Trump is apparently both obsessed with and terrified of sharks.
The strangest thing about that night — this was the best thing ever. You could see the television from the little dining room table and he was watching Shark Week and he was watching a special about the U.S.S. something and it sank and it was like the worst shark attack in history. He is obsessed with sharks. Terrified of sharks. He was like, “I donate to all these charities and I would never donate to any charity that helps sharks. I hope all the sharks die.” He was like riveted. He was like obsessed. It’s so strange, I know.
10. Trump is bad at giving compliments.
He kept rubbing my leg and was like, “You know, you’re so beautiful. I love your little nose, it’s like a little beet.” I go, “Did you say a beet? Like, what the f—?” I started giving him a hard time about it. And he goes, “No, no, no, no! It’s majestic. It’s a very smart nose, like an eagle.”
Like an EAGLE.
OK, I literally cannot take any more of this. I’m out.