Dec 3, 2008
My thoughts on Santa Claus: Who cares?
I worry what to teach my kids about Santa like I worry what to teach them about Rumpelstiltskin.
That is, I don’t.
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I thought a lot about it trying to see it from both sides of the coin. We’ve decided to just let them enjoy believing in Santa, even if it means a little deception. Hopefully it won’t be harmful in the end. I enjoy the kids enjoying Santa.
I tend to overthink this ‘problem’. Thanks Abraham.
This topic cause blogospheric thermonuclear warfare.
Beware.
I know this will probably run some the wrong way, but I can’t let it sit unspoken:
A lie is a sin. God hates sin. Therefore, God hates lies. In the sight of a holy and perfect Almighty God, there are NO “harmless” deceptions.
We opted to tell our 6-year-old son Zane the truth: that “Santa Claus” in his current incarnation is a retelling of an 11th-century Greek saint who had a reputation for secretly giving out gifts. He seems perfectly content with this information, and none of us lose an ounce of sleep over a deception. Zane knows what the true spirit of Christmas really is: the celebration of the birth of his King and Savior, Christ Jesus.
–Denita
…and by “run”, I mean “rub”. Aargh.
–Denita
Frank Turk:
Only if you take sides, and then call people on the other side nasty names.
Funny. I’m with you AP. But I do feel bad when my 3-year old son stares blankly at someone who asks him a question about Santa. He’s clueless.
We cannot lie to our kids. My wife to this day is bitter about the fact that her parents lied to her about Santa :-) She just can’t let it go.
We talked about Santa, marginally, maybe 6 weeks of the year. We talked about Jesus every day, seven days a week, 52 weeks a year. I did draw the line at the Easter Bunny. Too bizarre for even a child to believe!
Jayson, your wife’s bitterness toward her parents is a much greater problem than the reality of Santa.
If I think really hard about it, I am not sure that I have ever “told” my two toddlers anything about Santa, I simply didn’t hide it from them. It gives me a big smile to hear my two year old squeal at the sight of Jolly ol Saint Nick. Maybe its worse that I have left the topic of Santa up to hollywood and the department stores. But again I don’t give it much thought.
Is Rumpelstiltskin with Santa Claus an accurate comparison? I mean,
1. Rumpelstiltskin is not associated with a holiday celebrating Jesus’ birth.
2. Rumpelstiltskin is a character in a fairy story – not a (supposedly) living person involved in people’s lives (unless I am missing something)
are these fair points?
I have two children, now 17 and 11. We went through the whole Santa deception full bore with the older one. When she was around 7, it got really hard to keep the ruse going, particularly with her in a Christian school (a lot of people seem to want to make these types of decision for you, even if through their children as proxy.)
Once we “came clean” about it, she felt lie we’d lied to her and made her feel foolish for having believed it for so long. It may sound silly, but my wife and I ended up feeling REALLY bad and (rightly) guilty about the whole affair and swore that we wouldn’t go down that road with the younger one.
We were always clear with the younger one that Santa was make believe, but she didn’t care, she just kept right on having fun with the idea (letters, pictures, etc.) At first we tried to discourage her from recognizing him at all, and then resigned ourselves to the fact that we weren’t being deceptive this time and she just wanted to have fun with it.
Since then, we’ve had nothing but fun with her on the subject.
OK, so I’m Zach’s sister who sent this question to MN from TX. I never brought up SC to my 3 year old because he’s not part of our celebration. But, when SC is everywhere we look and his friends are talking about it, I can’t really avoid it. I don’t want Gabriel to tell all of his friends “Santa is dead” because that seems a little harsh. Obviously I’m not going to lie and say that Santa sneaks around to houses giving out presents either. I just want him and us to have a respectful response to the old lady at the grocery store who says, “What is Santa bringing you this year?” So I want to know what did your parents do. I mean, I’ve read your Mom’s book about family traditions, but what would she say to the old lady at the grocery store? What would you say?
I agree. In our house we treat Santa like any other fictional character.
The problem, of course, is that so many people in the church are not deceiving their kids into believing that Rumplestiltskin is some sort of real-life, joy/present-giving…thing. But they do with Santa.
I’m with you, Abraham. My 4 year old knows Santa is a fun story to read about at Christmas. But it’s only a story, although after reading Denita’s comment, maybe it is time to start sharing the background with him. Either way, he shocked a dr. the other day when asked, “What is Santa bringing you?” and he replied, “Santa’s not real.” I politely explained that we chose not to go down that road and the dr. understood and laughed but admitted he had never met a 4 year old who said that!
I’ll admit, it’s something we’ve struggled with. Especially as our oldest two are 6 and 8 now.
One thing that we’ve tried to consider in this (and other things) is letting our kids grow up believing in the magical and supernatural.
While I am a big fan of strict, reformed theology, one of the down-sides of such a rational (dare I say “modern-istic”?) approach is that it can make it hard to believe in the supernatural.
I like that my kids believe in Santa, and unicorns and dragons. On St. Patricks day, we build leprechaun traps and they wake up to find gold dust and green footprints all over the house.
Our hope is that these things will develop a sense of wonder and belief in the impossible, that will stick with them for life, even as they discover that Santa and leprechauns are just pretend, and that God is not.
The difference (I hope!) lies in that leprechauns and Santa – are not treated with the same honor and consistent attention that God is in our house.
Not trying to draw a line at all, and probably not even being clear…. but there it is.
My parents always insisted that there was a SC and even the Tooth Fairy when I was little. When I found out that there was not a SC, I was heartbroken, but I am SO glad that they decided to let me believe in them, because when you grow up, you have SO many memories about them. The important thing was that when I pushed them, they would just get this big grin on their face and say “why sure he’s real!” in a way that by the time I was probably 6, I could tell was fake. So they let me have my fun, they just didn’t make me believe it for too long. I think that’s the way to do it.
Even now, they still joke about it, and I think it’s very fun. Even to my very last tooth, I had to put it “on Dad’s dresser so that he could relay to the Tooth Fairy that I lost it”. It was just fun, I don’t think the issue of lying should be brought into it. As long as you make sure that Jesus is what is mainly talked about and even talking about Saint Nick and who he was, I think it’s ok.
It’s hard when extended family complicates the matter- then you have to teach.
I worry what to teach my kids about Santa like I worry what to teach them about Rumpelstiltskin.
You’ve just given me a category of thought I will cherish for many years to come.
Interesting post, Abraham. I do remember hearing a story about a young child who, upon hearing that Santa wasn’t real, asked his mom, “Well, is all that stuff about Jesus fake too?” Now, there could be many conclusions drawn from that story, but I think it’s true that many little kids have a hard time distinguishing between real and fake, especially if the fake is emphasized more than the real during the Christmas season. Also, they might believe in Santa at a deeper level because they can hold/play with the gifts he gave them, while they might not comprehend God’s gifts to them. This got longer than I thought it would. Oops!
Oh, one other thought. After spending the time, the energy, and the money to pick out gifts that you know your children will like, why would you want to give the credit to Santa? I’d want them to thank me!
Vicky. Thanks. I will pass that along to her.
I can’t remember where I got this (maybe John Piper?) but I know that I didn’t come up with it on my own. The potential problem with perpetuating the Santa facade is that our kids may extrapolate the Santa myth to Jesus. It’s just a cute, but ultimately fairy-tale, story that parents tell their kids. A kid might be tempted to think that “Hey they made up Santa, maybe they’re just making up Jesus too.”
Why risk our credibility?
I agree that this is not a big deal. My kids have never shown that much interest in Santa because we never gave him that much attention. I think there are some topics where we have to speak with our children like they are adults and imaginary, timeless, unshaven, gift giving, elf enslaving, flying old men that frequent retail outlets for a few months a year is one of those topics. We have just always addressed the matter directly and they seem to sense the implausibility of the idea on their own.
This year though, I am a little concerned that Santa may appear in front of Congress looking for a bailout. This will require a new strategy for discussing Santa with my children……
I read all the previous comments very seriously, as I am a new parent and considering such things… But when I finished, it did make me laugh to think that all of us grown-ups, who know that Santa isn’t real, are having such serious discussion about someone who is make-believe. It makes me want to turn to my ten-month old and ask for his humble opinion.
I actually plan on teaching my kids one day that Santa Claus is just something we all talk about for fun.
My agnostic dad always talks about his lack of belief in God being like finding out Satna Calus not real.
I want my kids to enjoy the same Santa idea that I did, but not have to deal with a gut disappointment and ridicule from peers when they find out the truth about Santa.
If your parents were dyslectic and you kept on getting presents from Satan would you worry then? I think that you might.
One of my happiest childhood memories is getting up on Christmas mornings as a 5 year old and running downstairs to see that Santa had actually delivered on the Star Wars Ewok Village playset. Sure, I probably would have enjoyed the presents just as much if my I’d known my parents had given them to me, but the idea that some magical benevolent man from the North Pole had traveled to give me something I’d written him about made the gifts that much more special.
When I learned the truth a couple years later, my faith in Jesus wasn’t shaken. Kids live in a world of imagination as it is. If you tell your young children Santa isn’t real, you might as well tell them that their imaginary friends/worlds are all fictitious as well.
Why bother? Why bother embracing our culture’s idea of Christmas? With Jesse Trees and advent wreaths, nativity scenes, and other Christ centered things to focus our preparations for Christmas as a family, I frankly don’t have time to perpetuate the santa myth for my children. Above all we want to instill in our children an expectancy that is totally wrapped up in Jesus not in presents or myths or greed or materialism. They’ll get some presents (mostly from the thrift store!) But hopefully their souls will grow from what we study this season. (My 5yo has enjoyed the true story of St. Nic., she’s asked questions about the guy in the red suit with the long beard. I’ve told her the story just like I’ve told her the story of Cinderella and her fairy god-mother. Santa is a non-entity. )
Abraham,
How did your mom and dad handle this topic when you and your brothers (and your sister) were younger?
Chris Slater-
I want to know how to make green footprints! That sounds like so much fun!
There’s so much more to worry about!
Care without getting wrapped around the axle!
Santa is fun, but Christ is our LIFE!
Rachel:
Three years later and I still love that 12/27 post — for all its rough edges.
sigh. christmas eve also involves some kind of moral dilemma until 3 in the morning for me. so morning is sweet relief. my sibs and i hide out in my sister’s room and open our presents…it’s like…so exciting because it has nothing to do with our parents…but it does. it’s like this cute thing where we all feel so incredibly grateful for our parents but it’s totally undercover-unforced-not for show. it’s a very unique feeling. i still like putting out food for santa, the reindeer, and santa mouse. it’s like…you can count on all those things that you read in storybooks to come to life for one night.
Jen B.
http://www.simplifynetworks.com/blog/?p=240
Green paint, the side of your hand, pinky finger to make the toes…
Plus a little bit of St. Patty’s magic :)
Exactly. I believe kids will be indifferent to Santa as long as we are indifferent. I don’t see any reason to get crazy anti-Santa. He is a fictional character just like Cinderella or the Incredible Hulk.
I blogged on this last week after an encounter with a woman whose grandchild was traumatized after being confronted with the truth. I think you have to wean kids off SC very carefully, once you’ve determined it’s the right time to start.
I’m not really in a position to speak since I’m not a Christian and don’t yet have kids, but if I were and I did, I think I’d find it problematic to teach young children to believe in two powerful beings based purely on faith and then around age 6 admit that one of those two is fake while insisting the other is real. Sounds confusing, to say the least.
So, am I reading these comments correctly? Santa isn’t real?!?! Boy, have my mom and dad got a lot of explaining to do!
[...] My thoughts on Santa Claus: Who cares? – Abraham Piper [...]
i was JUST thinking yesterday that i, myself, personally, and hopefully not judgmentally, think that pretending Santa is real is dumb and i wish my parents hadn’t done it. (not to put too fine a point on it.) still, i’d feel bad if my hypothetical future child ruined all the other kids’ Christmas by letting the cat out of the bag.
in the end i concluded that since i’m a long way from having children, i can make better use of my time than thinking about Santa. :]
O my gosh……I guess I’m just too black and white. It does my heart no harm to tell my four and three year old boys that Santa is a make-believe character. I relish in seeing them get excited about the manager and the cross.
My parents always taught me that Santa was a fun Christmas thing that people liked to make-believe about. While we didn’t do the Santa thing at my house, we were never told that Santa was evil. And we were told that if our friends started talking about Santa, then we knew their family wanted to pretend he was real, so we weren’t supposed to ruin the game for them. We did learn the real story of St. Nicholaus, and how he was a real guy, but we also learned that today’s Santa Claus is just a make-believe character based on him.
I think this is definitely the approach I’ll take with my kids. It kept my brother and I from having any struggles about our parents lying to us, plus it prevented those mortifying “I told all my friends that Santa is dead” conversations.
Aww, come on. Norad tracks Santa and Forbeshas an article about him. You mean to tell me he’s not real? What a disappointment.
You know…I don’t know :|
We dealt with Santa the same way we dealt with explaining the great big sign at the tire store–the giant man with a tire hanging from his arm–or the giant oversize donut on top of the donut shop:
“What’s that, Mommy?”
“A pretend donut.”
It never interfered with their enjoyment of donuts!
I drew a very hard line for myself with regard to EVER telling the boys anything that would EVER leave them realizing, later on, that I had not told them the truth. That does not mean I went out of my way to ruin dreams or imagination…just wouldn’t say things that weren’t so to sustain dreams or imagination.
I would rather teach them about nyads and dryads (which I do believe in) than about the American Santa Clause myth (which I don’t believe in).
Saint Nicholas is a nice substitute.
I got myself in real trouble with the tooth fairy, though. I’ve never felt worse as a father than when I had to tell my son that the tooth fairy wasn’t real and that those notes he had been passing to her so eagerly were answered by none other than myself.
Thanks AP for the post. I, for one, am relieved that you do not fret over it. I can say from personal experience, the ruse was troubling for me for may be a couple of weeks. I sought therapy much later in life, but we never had to work on the ‘Santa’ issue.
It’s funny…my mom told us that Santa, Tooth Fairy, etc., were real, but they weren’t the best at hiding the presents, showed up late with the cash under the pillow (we sometimes were already awake–we awoke quite early), so we knew they were fake but pretended that we believed for the adults sake.
My husband and I told our kids that Santa, Tooth Fairy, etc., were stories. So they knew they were fake, but pretended they were real just for fun. And we had fun pretending with them…
Here are some things to think about:
Jesus is immortal, and lives in heaven.
Santa is immortal and lives at the North Pole
The Christ of Christmas came to make His Father known to us.
Santa is known as Father Christmas
Once, at the end of the age, Jesus will leave heaven with His saints, led by an angel blowing a trumpet.
Once a year, Santa leaves the North Pole with his reindeer, led by Rudolph and his flashing red nose.
Jesus sits enthroned in heaven
Santa sits enthroned in the marketplace
Jesus said, “Let the little children come unto me…and taking them on His knee He blessed them.”
Santa welcomes the children and sits them on his knee…
We picture Jesus as wearing a white robe (purity)
Santa wears a red costume (sin) (“Tho’ your sins are as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow”)
Jesus gives spiritual gifts
Santa promises material gifts
Jesus is omnipresent and omniscient (all-knowing, all seeing, all wise).
Santa is omnipresent and omniscient; “He sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. He knows if you’ve been bad or good…”
Jesus’ helpers are angels to bring man to the gift of salvation (Heb 1:14)
Santa’s helpers are elves, to make the gifts he brings to children.
Jesus gave Himself — the greatest gift of all — to sinners.
Santa gives gifts to those who are good.
Jesus is reality, yet is declared by the world as a myth.
Santa is mythical, yet upheld by the world as real.
(A good question to ask is, ‘where did all the above traditions about Santa come from?”
I find the comparisons/differences quite interesting. Sorry, but I think it DOES matter, and if I was able to start all over again with my kids, Santa would not be a part of our Christmas)
We don’t do the Santa thing, for many of the reasons already stated.
Be forewarned though, if you don’t “do” Santa your kids are going to have some really interesting discussions with their friends who believe in Santa :)
Wow ~ my husband and I recently told our 5 year old “the truth.” He was horrified and blamed it on me, he called me “deceiver.” Thankfully, my three year old was accepting – when this one asked at the mall, are you sure he’s not real, he’s right over there? I gently asked him a few questions that were on the tip of my tongue – who can see everything that we do – both good and bad… his reply – “God,” and so I said, well then is it possible for santa to see and know everything, then he believed.
I submit to you a lie is a lie is a lie…. we as parents have to ponder the path of our feet, they are right behind us…
My parents did the same as what Amanda Beattie posted above. We never believed in Santa, but were told not to tell our friends at school because it was something for their parents to tell them. We were also told that if we spoiled it for others, we would be disciplined for disobeying. (Not that telling the truth is a bad thing, but lording it over others is in addition to the disobedience sure is!) I don’t have kids, but if/when I do, I would like to do as my parents did with my bro, sis, and I.
Kids–especially those from a well-disciplined home–are, in fact, capable of obeying in this area. It seems to me that to automatically assume otherwise underestimates both the kids and the hard work of good parenting.
We just didn’t really address the whole Santa thing with my little bro, who has down syndrome. We thought we’d just let it slide as we’ve never “had Santa” as part of our traditions. When the rest of us older kids were small, we were all, “Oh that poor little kid; he actually thinks Santa is REAL!”
Obviously it hasn’t worked this time around. My little bro is convinced Santa is both real AND awesome. He’s in love with the guy.
OOh, I want Myrrdin to explain: naiads and dryads? As in, like, fairies?
We do what Amanda’s parents did, telling our kids the origins of Santa, that other families pretend he’s real, and not to ruin their game even though we don’t pretend. The enjoy the Santa books and movies, and we have decorations, but they have always known what parts about him are true and what parts are just pretend.
When they were younger I told them that when people leave gifts in secret they say they’re “being Santa” or when someone finds a gifts left in secret they say, “Santa brought it” because St Nicholas left gifts secretly. We never said to them that he’s not real, because he was a real person. As far as I know, they never ruined it for the other kids, however…
A few years ago, after an adult asked my daughter what Santa brought her, she later told me, “Mommy! He’s all grown up and his parents FORGOT TO TELL HIM IT’S JUST A GAME.”
Really, there is no lying involved! Just as with Rumplestiltskin or other “fairy tales”, we tell our children to “use your imagination.”
I agree, but only partly. Rumplestiltskin is just not a visible and highly lauded part of our society as Santa Claus – I think we as parents must be more purposeful than that.
Our stance is and has been to NOT make a big deal of Santa. He is part of the Christmas around us, but that’s it – just a part. Our goal is to make much of Jesus in Christmas AND, when Santa comes up, to talk about St. Nicholas in reference to his Jesus-like compassion and giving.
Let’s make much of Jesus and let other’s worry about Santa.
SNL’s “church lady” has some timeless truth on this one: if you rearrange the letters for SANTA = SATAN
Oh my word! People! Chill!
My parents made a HUGE deal about Santa NOT being real. I was one puffed up little kid, walking around informing all the neighbor kids that their parents were liars and my parents were not. That Jesus wasn’t even born on Christmas, it was another pagan holiday, blah blah blah.
My own kids believe in Santa like they believe in Cinderella or Snow White. It’s fun, it’s magical, it’s so delightful on Christmas morning.
They also totally freak out when they see the carrots we left out on the doorstep have been nibbled by passing reindeer! LOL!
It’s a blast.
Our oldest just turned three, so this is the first year we’ve had to even think about how we will handle Santa. I know that as a child, I loved believing in Santa at Christmas. I never thought about him the rest of the year, and his part in Christmas never took away from the celebration of Jesus’ birth. I think most kids figure out it’s Mom and Dad, but still like the idea of Santa.
We are doing the whole Advent/Christmastide/Epiphany Christmas this year and plan to make this our family tradition. That way Santa and presents are just one part of one day in a season that is dedicated to the excitement and wonder of the fact that Jesus left heaven and came to earth as a baby.
I think Santa is like anything else we as parents have to deal with. We have to be deliberate in deciding how we will address the issue in our home; if we don’t, then the culture will determine how our kids see it.
I like what Brian said. Santa is everywhere, so he’s a little more important to talk about than Rumplestil…. whatever his name is. (see what I mean?) It’s something that is gonna be on a kid’s consciousness at Christmas time… you just can’t miss him, so I figure it’s a good idea to set ‘em straight about the guy. I’d just talk about it like it is; a story. Fun to pretend about for about 5 minutes, then on to reality.
But then, I don’t have kids yet, so maybe I’ll change my mind when I do.
Wow. Evidently about 40 people do care very passionately….
We won’t do the whole believe-in-Santa thing, but we won’t care if our young kids someday want to write letters to Santa, leave cookies out… As long as there’s plenty of teaching/celebrating/traditions about Jesus, we don’t see the harm in it when they’re old enough to know the difference between what is real and what is pretend. But we won’t pretend Santa’s a reality :)
Our 3 1/2 yr old understands when we say Santa is just a “cartoon”, or pretend.
My parents were mostly upfront about Santa Claus, although I do remember him eating the cookies we left for him once. They must have fessed up shortly thereafter when they refused to lie to me when I started asking questions. However the tooth fairy is another story, where I found out the hard way. I even had a debate in kindergarden (I think) where I professed that Santa was pretend, but the tooth fairy-she was real. The jig was soon-as they say-up.
In defense of those who choose to trick their children, there is a difference between claims about Santa and claims about Jesus. Jesus claims are historical (Jesus lived, died, and rose again), whereas Santa comes eats cookies, leaves presents, the toothfairy leaves money under the pillow, and the easter bunny lays eggs all over the house-oh wait-that was really mom and dad. Children are able to make the distinction between tricks and historical claims.
Ben makes a good point. Safest to put Santa in the category of “pretend” right away. I certainly don’t want to send the message that someone we can’t see, can’t be real.
I’m assuming Denita’s comment near the top was in response to mine. She said,
A lie is a sin. God hates sin. Therefore, God hates lies. In the sight of a holy and perfect Almighty God, there are NO “harmless” deceptions.”
Denita, I’m glad you are able to see everything so black and white in your world. I see some things a little more gray. I think it was probably a positive thing when Rahab lied to protect the spies. Did God hate that? Would God hate it if you deceived an evil-doer that was trying to harm your family? What about when a friend of yours asks how you like her horrible new hairdo? Do you tell her how terrible she looks? Or when a friend that’s just had a newborn baby asks, “Isn’t he precious?!?” Does God hate it when you say, “He sure is, he’s adorable.” Or would God rather you say, “No, he’s not precious at all. Actually he looks like a skinny wrinkled up alien.”
And when I told my 5 year old son, “That’s the best skateboarding trick I’ve ever seen!” God hates that? Or would God rather me tell him, “That wasn’t very good. You’ve got a lot of practice to do if you want to be any good. And the odds are that you’ll never amount to anything as a skateboarder.” When a mom tells her daughter that she’s the most beautiful princess in the world, God hates that?
Kids live in a world of imagination. My 5 year old son loves dressing up in costumes and uniforms and pretending he’s a ninja or a cowboy. He loves believing his new shoes make him run faster. He loves believing the orange rock he found at the creek is a treasure left by pirates. Does God hate it that I don’t set him straight?
And as for Santa, Christmas morning was my favorite day of the year. I loved looking forward to seeing what Santa brought me. And I wasn’t upset with my parents when I found out. But I was very upset at the other kid who told me and squashed all the joy I had believing in Santa. And you know what else? I still believe in Jesus. Santa had no impact whatsoever on my faith in Christ.
I’m glad you have such a good handle on what God hates. I don’t.
Yesterday, at the request of my daughter, I spoke with Princess Leia on a broken cell phone. Something about picking up her older brother from school. I told her the princess will be by shortly in her spaceship, and the two of them could go pick him up. She was thrilled at the news.
I honestly don’t know what that really has to do with this conversation. I guess that I didn’t worry if she believed Princess Leia was real, and that I didn’t tell her to not “play” with her because she isn’t real. I realize the Santa thing is a bit different.
Johnny wrote @ December 3, 2008 at 1:08 pm
OK, so I’m Zach’s sister who sent this question to MN from TX. I never brought up SC to my 3 year old because he’s not part of our celebration. But, when SC is everywhere we look and his friends are talking about it, I can’t really avoid it.
the way I initially read this:
OK, so I’m Zach’s sister who sent this question to Minnesota from Texas. I never brought up South Carolina to my 3 year old…
Yes, Danielle, there really are tree spirits. ;-)
I have no kids at present so I really have nothing to contribute. However, I was one of those kids who, when my parents told me that santa wasn’t real at 5ish, asked my parents if Jesus was real too. In saying that, I’m not sure whether it had any lasting effect on my faith but my parents have felt guilty about it ever since! (I’m now 32!)
Well, this is interesting. I’ve never really talked about Santa around my preschool-age boys. I wonder what they think about him.
I think I’ll go ask them….oops they’re in bed. It’ll wait until tomorrow.
This one is harder for me than Ben. I grew up believing in Santa and have such sweet memories of this. It was tough when Ben, who didn’t grow up believing in Santa, didn’t want to “do the whole Santa thing”. He likes to keep the focus on Christ and the true meaning of Christmas. So we decided to tell Noah and Phin about St. Nick and the story behind the saint and we try to focus on Advent and the 12 days of Christmas. So you can imagine my surprise, the other day, when a nurse asked Noah what he wanted for Christmas and he responded, “Santa is going to bring me three robots.”
For those of you who “care” here’s Pastor John in his own words from many years back. =) Happy Christmas Celebrations!!!!
“But mostly let us outstrip the world in joy and celebration by filling our homes and our churches with as many explicitly Christ-centered symbols as possible. Let us decorate in such a way that guests and passers-by say: “These people must really believe the old myth is true!” Christmas is first Christ, second Christ, third Christ, and again and again Christ!”
http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/TasteAndSee/ByDate/1981/2894_How_We_See_Christmas_Symbols/
We have been living in Eastern Europe for the past four years where “Santa” and even “Christmas” is not a cultural concept. My kids only experience of Christmas has been Jesus/Gospel centered in our home and church. We are in America this year and seeing their reaction to cultural Christmas is enlightening and instructive. We walked past a yard display this morning and the kids were kinda fascinated with the inflatable Frosty, and Santa air-tents complete with blowing snow inside them. Having never seen anything like it, they asked again and again “why do people put those in their front yard?” – “what is that for?” I replied that it was to celebrate Christmas. Now they were really confused. My son looked up and asked, “What does that have to do with Christmas?” Having grown up in the states, I instinctively identified that display with Christmas, they instinctively did not.
[...] of those issues which makes your buttocks numb from fence sitting. Abraham Piper’s post at 22 Words stoked up a hornets nest. It’s a subject almost as controversial as home [...]
From the time Katie (5) was two years old, we’ve been forthright and told her that the people around us took a man who loved Jesus and gave to the poor & needy, and turned him into a materialistic old man who gives gifts to selfish, rich kids.
The way I see it, we lose street cred on “the Jesus stuff” when we tell our kids that an actual fairy tale is true. They should enjoy fantasy as fantasy.
We spent every Christmas eve with my father’s parents. My grandfather, who died when I was 10, was a firefighter. I remember now with great fondness, him turning on his fireman’s CB radio and hearing the “live broadcasts” of the firemen saying where Santa was spotted throughout the night.
Although I came to terms with Santa’s reality in a rather cruel way (in a joint intervertion from my older sister regarding the Easter bunny), the reality of Santa’s fallacy did not incite disregard for my grandfather. In fact, I honor him for it. I could not believe that so many men would work hard to give us the thrill that Santa just might be real. It opened my heart and my eyes to the fact that not everything I see is ultimately “reality”. Doing so prepared my heart perfectly to receive a Savior who is very much real and very much not a visible person before me.
I’m not siding to allow Santa or not, I’m saying that not every kid who is allowed to have imagination on Christmas Eve is going to be resentful or drawn from God from being allowed so.
Although, when I found out Santa wasn’t in the Bible (circa, age 9) I was a little bummed.
Abraham. You’re right! I do what I do at my house ocncerning Santa out of personal conviction, but I’m not worried about what I , or my best friend who does something different is doing. Thank you for making the statement!
Tony C.–I’m sorry if what I said rubbed you the wrong way, I never intended it to be offensive.
I grew up in a family where lies were so casually tossed about, that thirty-some years later I still can’t figure out how much of my family’s colorful history is truth or fiction. Santa was a minor deception, but only the beginning of a long and carefully-crafted series of “loving, well-intentioned, and harmless” lies. My father lied to hide his adulteries and impulse spending from my mother. My mother–who oversaw the house’s finances–lied to keep my impulsive father from compulsively spending, and continues to lie to this day about her husband’s fidelity. Both of them lied to my brother and I to control our behavior, and we all were encouraged to lie to our friends to preserve the “dignity” of the family.
Those lies have now spiraled out of control. In order to preserve one lie, another has to be crafted. It’s no small wonder that it took me more than two decades to even BEGIN to trust anyone–much less my Almighty Father who I can not yet see.
Your point about Rahab is understandable. Yes, there are times when a lie is an absolute necessity–if a life is in danger such as those of the spies in her household, for example. But how is Rahab’s actions and their preservation of an entire nation on any par with the perpetuation of a Christmas myth? I do not lie to my son and tell him Santa DOESN’T exist, because he does. He IS a man from many centuries ago who feared and loved God and did many kind things. He became romanticized and mythologized as the centuries passed. Little remains of the original man, now in his place stands an “elf” who flies through the night in a sleigh pulled by magical reindeer. Nicholas of Myra would be physically ill to see what has become of his name and his work!
I will not let my son go through the same hell that I did. I made that pledge when he was born. It has eliminated a lot of gray and makes the black and white much easier to deal with.
–Denita
[...] a couple weeks ago I saw this post in Google Reader and clicked on through to read this blog post from the son of John Piper a local pastor of a multi-campus mega church here in the MSP [...]
[...] Piper at 22 Words had a couple helpful post on the Santa question: ‘Who Cares?‘ and ‘He’s [...]