Dec 15, 2008
Snow and neighborliness: The guilt of shoveling my walk but not my neighbor’s.
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The wall of snow across the sidewalk when I’ve shoveled and my neighbor hasn’t seems to shout, “No, I won’t help you.”
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© 2012 Abuyo. All rights reserved.
I know my own reluctance to help. Sometimes though, I don’t help because people are embarassed by help.
I don’t know your neighbors, but I can tell you, as a single girl, it’s always nice to come home from work, get up in the morning, etc. and find that your neighbor has already shoveled the steps to the car (and in some cases has cleaned off the car, too!). I’ve always seen it as a very pleasant surprise and unexpected blessing. I recommend helping the neighbors… :)
You know how there’s that tiny strip of grass between the sidewalk and the street? That screams the same thing, I think: Mow your neighbor’s tiny little piece of it while you’re at it! It seems crazy to leave something unmowed that is 3 feet by 2 feet, just because it’s on their property line.
I can’t imagine shoveling snow, by the way. I live in Houston and my friend took her two-year-old swimming outdoors last week (it was in the 80s). Then it snowed two days later. Weird.
I just wish I had snow to be shoveled.
If my neighbor happened to shovel it, I would be oh, so grateful.
By the way, I would love to get some snow from you all and experince what it is really like to shovel the snow here in NC. I would love to help my neighbor to shovel it for them too.
I do remember as I was raking and sweeping pine straws out of my parent’s driveway, and I also did it for my neighbor’s driveway too. It is a blessing to do that for other if we can do it.
We should do it for Christ too.
‘Guerite ~ BoldLion
we have a neighbor who has a plow on a little 4-wheeler thing, and he does our whole street. i’m so thankful. dave and i were also given a snow-blower, so i’m hoping we can share the wealth.
in other words, machines make it easier to help, i guess. ;-)
Depends if your neighbor is an able-bodied man. If so, he has a responsibility to care for himself.
I miss Minnesota bad in the winter.
Dad used to walk four houses down to Grandma’s, fire up her big ol’ Toro snowblower, clean Grandma’s driveway and sidewalk, then blow the whole sidewalk back to our house, blow our sidewalk and driveway, then get the Campes’ next door. I knew he loved doing it. I loved doing it, too.
While aware of my predilection for romantic mythologizing of my hometown, I still think those cold, snowy winters are good for people.
Yeah, you’re a bad person. Hang your head in shame. ;)
I used to feel the same way about mowing the grass. So awkward when you stop right at the property line, but are you supposed to just mow the neighbors’ grass every time?
Actually, when I was a kid sometimes I would, but that had more to do with liking the riding lawnmower.
While considering if you should shovel your neighbor’s walk, also consider shoveling a little path from your neighbors mailbox to yours for your mailman. They love that!
That’s why my dad always encourages us to shovel all of the driveways around us for people who would have trouble otherwise. Because we are surrounded by older people, this ends up meaning that we shovel p to five driveways.
I occasionally shovel a single-wide path in front of the building next door for less than altruistic reasons: they don’t shovel at all until the city sends them a nastygram, and I get tired of having to walk through it every day.
What’s “snow”?
Scot,
Austin, TX
HAHA!!
I’ve seen pictures in National Geographic, I think.
Michael
Rome, GA
I think I sometimes see it in the mountains in the distance.
Stephen
Orange County, CA
When we lived in a house with a sidewalk I made it a priority to always shovel the neighbors walk on each side of our house. And let me tell you it feels the same way at the end of their property with that wall of snow you refer to. “No I won’t help you unless you live right next door to me.”
So then sometimes I’d shovel the next one as well… sometimes. If you’ve got a snowblower then instead of how many yards, your decision becomes how blocks you’re going to clear.
I am feeling it with ya, Aber.
I like shoveling. But when it’s this cold I might just do the single strip to the neighbors front walk.
But this also brings up some city etiquette. It’s nice if you don’t block the shovel out sidewalk part to the curb. Then no one has to walk through the snow to get up to the sidewalk. :)
is that how to get snow off your sidewalk so you don’t slip and die? shovel it?
I’ve got a snow blower and have been doing mine and my neighbor’s driveway for a couple years. Last week, when I was out of town and we got a foot of snow, I called my wife and told her to offer the snow blower to the neighbor if he would do our house too, which he did, twice (and the neighbor across the street.)
It’s always great to ponder the ideal of a “good neighbor”. That said, Jesus did not seem to heal every person in every town, either. There seems to be something divine about calling, however insignificant that calling seems at the time.
Relatedly, does the theology of “put on your own mask first, before assisting those around you” creep into this question, too?
Priorities. You had a blog post to write; and it reaches and blesses a much greater audience.
I don’t work, and I homeschool – so my day is pretty much mine to do with unless my mother needs rides to chemo or the doctor’s office.
That said, I snowblow our drive and walk, our neighbor’s drive and walk and the sidewalk down passed the alley. I do that because our next door neighbors both teach school and have two small children. They are out the door early and not home until winter dusk. (I also let their dog out twice a day for them)
Funny story – last year, after snowblowing, it occured to me that Ken and Shannon’s Christmas lights hadn’t come on that evening. Yep – I’d run over the cord while cleaning their walk! Man, was I ever red in the face when I showed up with a replacement outdoor extension!!
Someone mentioned shoveling a path for the mail man.
As a former gas/electric/water meter reader, I’d also like to say we always appreciated a shoveled path to the meter, too!
In Minneapolis proper it isn’t an issue (thanks in part to a certain “remote meter reading” company), but moreso out in the ‘burbs.
yea cutting grass is much easier.
It screams to me, “MOLLY! We should buy that snow blower so we can be better Christians!”
Think about it.
Something there is that doesn’t love a wall. . . .
I guess it depends how much time you have. If you’re not in a hurry, you can do a little of the neighbor’s walk, or all of it. If you think they’ll stall around and wait for you to do it all the time, then don’t do it every time, but sometimes.
We knew a neighbor who, even if he was sick, would get mad if someone mowed his lawn.
In the development where we live now, everyone shovels everyone else’s walk. No one takes advantage of anyone, and everyone helps everyone out.
yeah, i was sorta thinking what lousy neighbors we have this morning. no only kidding, thanks for shoveling ours:) well yours, but ours too:)
I’m not able to shovel for myself, and I usually don’t have money to pay someone else. I am, therefore, so grateful when my neighbors do it for me.
Really Robin:
You are an extremely kind neighbour, but please, please, never say “I don’t work and I homeschool” again!
Just go ahead and shovel your neighbor’s. sidewalk You evidently feel some ‘prodding’ to do it.
My retired Dad has a push along snow-blower. He does the sidewalk and driveway for Mom, then goes to a few neighbors to clear theirs. Your post reminded me of what a generous, hard-working, amazing 70-year-old man my dad is and the value of a snow-blower!
Knsas winter’s don’t usually have constant huge snowfalls, but big snows happen. This morning we woke to a snowcovering (2 inches and still snowing large lucious flakes), Dad helps his neigbors because he has time and he is a strong, healthy man! He could not have been so helpful when he was working full time w/ lots of over-time, even if he’d wanted! My brothers and I did snow removal then! Just think, sooner than you realize, your sons will work alongside you!
Dave had a good idea of loaning the snowblower to neighbors. (Sorry this is a long comment.)
If you do one neighbor…. then you are faced with a wall of snow on the next…. Where do you stop?
I shovel the snow in our family, and by the end of clearing a foot or two off my own driveway and sidewalk, I’m exhausted! I have once helped the neighbor, but both my neighbors have snowblowers. That does make it easier to be kind to others – they often do my sidewalk!
I’m grateful when they do.
Elli’es quandry speaks loudly and resoundingly: EVERY CHRISTIAN SHOULD OWN A SNOWBLOWER. In the time it take you to shovel your walk, you can do your side of the street from corner to corner. I had one in Manitowoc, WI, and gave it away to a neighbor kids when we left — if he promised to do the whole block and not just his parents’ driveway.
Or you could do something else with that money — like ministry, right?
As a single mom with two jobs and kids at home, it is very hard to shovel, and I don’t have a snowblower. I have never had a neighbor help me, and they know I am alone. I have a a very nice friend from my church(where I work) who has driven 6 miles with his snowblower to clear my driveway for me. Just do it man! We dont have sidewalks in my neighborhood. I do my sidewalk from the driveway to the front door, so at least that is clear.
Having a south facing driveway really helps, I used to have that but now mine faces north. You think of these things when you live in the Chicago area.
Frank- how dare you suggest spending money on anything other than ministry! ;)
I agree with you. Something like a snowblower could do a lot for the sake of God’s Kingdom. (well, it’s really the serving part, not the snowblower itself.)
Bless you widow neighbor by shoveling young man.
More awkward when you live next to people you know well. I would do it but my back is bad. My husband’s back is also bad and he does ours and then has to come in and ice his back.
It is always sad for me to see our neighbor whiz by in his snowblower and stop right at the line. We’re another, what, 50 feet? Then I look at my husband who has hand-shoveled and is icing his back on the couch with his legs pulled up to his knees.
Just awkward. If you can help somebody, do it. (We don’t expect our neighbor to do ours but it would be nice once in a while.)
I feel guilty writing this here.
Look at it this way, you are not helping your neighbor, you are helping all the pedestrians who won’t have to walk in the street.
We do make sure ours is always done. ALWAYS DONE. Even when my husband has to pay the price with his back for a few days, ours is always shoveled.
We have a lot of foot traffic on our public sidewalk due to a well-attended church being just a few blocks from here. The parishioners park all the way down on our block, too, so we always feel good knowing they have our path nice and clear, and like Ruthie said, it keeps people out of the street.
Tracey, we have a north-facing sidewalk and we don’t even live in Chicago — maybe you say it for different reasons, but one of the reasons my husband makes sure to shovel our property/sidewalk early is to get the sun to melt it clean, as we don’t get nearly the same amount of sun help as our neighbors across the street with the sunny Southern exposure.
Fred Rogers is turning in his grave.
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