In a perfect world, every relationship would end with a polite conversation after which both parties amicably go their separate ways, never to speak or stalk each other's Instagram ever again. Maybe they could even share a breakup sundae and promise to delete all the embarrassing photos they have of one another. But in the real world, relationships don't always end with a friendly high-five. Here are some of the worst stories of people finding out their significant other was cheating, and none of them include a mutual breakup sundae (although one does involve a giant cookie).
When a cheater accidentally incriminates themselves:
If someone is overly suspicious that you are cheating in a relationship (even though you’re definitely not) it’s usually a red flag that they are the ones with something to hide. Reddit user E_lizz wrote:
“We shared a computer and he installed one of those programs that automatically saves all chat logs, most likely because he thought I was cheating on him (I wasn’t). I didn’t know this program was installed until I was looking for a document I needed for school. Found the program, opened it to see what it was, and found logs of him chatting with a girl about the great time they spent together and how he thought they really connected, etc.”
Um, whoops, that plan backfired. He’s definitely not getting his girlfriend back after that. And he’s also probably not getting a job as an undercover secret agent, either.
This person was probably better off with a book, anyway:
The only thing worse than being cheated on is when the person cheating on you is cheating with your friend, which is exactly what happened to Reddit user Ash_Britt_Chloe_Spik:
“My best friend lived in the family’s old vacation trailer behind his house (back in the ’90s). I arrived with a twelve-pack, opened the door and there was my girlfriend. She was standing full frontal (not a stitch on) and he was in his boxers. Later he told me “Nothing happened.” J. D. Salinger had a term for that kind of guy, it was… PHONY.”
Nothing happened, though! I’m sure there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation like um, he was taking a life-drawing class and he had to sketch a nude figure and she graciously volunteered and also, um, all his clothes were in the laundry and … nevermind.
Caught by the U.S. Postal Service:
Nobody is advocating for cheating, but if you’re going to do it, at least try to be like, not terrible at it. Reddit user tmushrush wrote:
“She sent naked pics to the guy, with our return address and didn’t put enough postage. I came home first that day…”
She probably thought she was being super sneaky by avoiding having sexts on her phone but, come on, weigh that snail mail! That’s what the scale in the post office is for!
Foiled by her own technology:
We trust our phones and computers with so many things these days. They keep our bank accounts secure, our calendars up to date, and get Chinese food delivered to our houses very quickly. But if you trust them to keep your cheating secrets, they might betray you. Reddit user kjlo5 wrote:
“iMessage linked to her computer. I was on her computer buying stuff off Amazon and she was sitting on the couch, feet from me, texting her ex. He was trying to get her to send him nudes and they were reminiscing about previous encounters. He was bragging about how he made her “leg shake” all the while I was watching the conversation in real time, right next to her. My adrenaline kicked in and I simply closed the computer and left the house without saying a word. This was over a year ago and I’m still fighting her for custody of our children.”
The worst birthday ever:
Reddit user pedo_troll did not have the 21st birthday he hoped for, instead having the type of night that no one would ever hope for.
“In college I shared a large bedroom with my best friend. It was my 21st birthday, and we threw a party at my house. It was getting late and I was wondering where my girlfriend was, I went up to my bedroom and found them in bed together.”
You’d think sharing a room with someone would make cheating at least slightly inconvenient, but some cheating knows no bounds.