Almost every day, we hear someone say something, at least, remotely stupid. There are those lucky souls who are naturally aloof to the idiocy of others, and some who are acutely aware, yet choose to take an "ignorance is bliss" approach to morons. But then there's the rest of us, who pretty much want to punch people on a daily basis.
But every blue moon, someone will say something so incredibly stupid that it's impossible to overlook or ignore; something so stupid it does not annoy or anger the cynic, nor does it cause the lighthearted to chuckle.
This sort of profound idiocy can only be met with silent awe, as one simultaneously questions their hearing and experiences a sense of gratitude for their own intact mind. This is often followed by yet more silence, as the final realization sets in that there is absolutely zero point in trying to explain anything at all to a person that is capable of saying something so magnificently dumb.
To pay tribute to these rare and unique moments of pure and unadulterated stupidity, people took to Reddit to share their most moronic memories. Here are 20 times that people heard someone say something so superbly stupid that they could only silently stare back in utter disbelief...
1. Some people don't know how babies work.
Once worked with a girl who asked me when babies first open their eyes. I said straight away after birth. She didn’t believe me because every time she saw her niece, her eyes were closed. I had to explain to her that babies sleep a lot. She thought babies were like kittens.
Oh dear, bless her heart.. her stupid, stupid heart.
2. Pip pip, cheerio!
Worked in childcare when I was younger. We had a new student starting my class and her dad was from the UK. On her first day when [her] dad came to pick up, my assistant says ‘She’ll probably talk like you, right? Aren’t accents hereditary?
Nope, accents are not hereditary, but stupidity often is.
3. I don't think they INTEND to do that.
Once while driving on a rural road a friend (age 17) asked, “Why do all of the raccoons come to the side of the road to die?
Here’s hoping that they drove straight to the Emergency Room to get this girl a CAT scan. She probably wondered where all the kittens were though…
4. Maybe she needs glasses?
A city friend of mine got excited seeing his first cow: ‘Wow, look a deer.’ It was a black-and-white Holstein cow, so not even close…
Hmmm, this friend was from the ‘city’ were they? Seeing as though there’s no television or internet in the city, this ignorance makes perfect sense.
5. But has she ever seen a calendar?
I got into an argument with a lady who insisted she was right about there being 10 months in a year.
I feel like I’ve lost a good two months this year, too. Where does the time go?
Do you have a dark sense of humor? If so, this next stupid human thinks you’re a racist…