25 Harmlessly Unethical Lifehacks That Are Actually Pretty Damn Clever

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When life gives you lemons, sometimes you just have to employ some creativity and hack it. Recently, Reddit-users have developed an extensive list of mildly unethical life-hacks, and many of them are genuinely clever solutions to relatable problems that crop up for almost all of us.

Here are 25 of the cagiest (and funniest) unethical life-hacks!

Give your child a first name that starts with “M” and middle name that starts with “D.” For their entire life they can lowkey claim to be a doctor by writing their name as “Smith, M.D.” They will likely benefit from it on job applications, court documents, etc. –MeowyMcMeowMeowFace

Next time you rent a car, show up to get it on crutches and ask for help getting into the car. 9/10 times the agent will see you struggling and give you a free upgrade to a larger vehicle for free. –brother_p

If you’re feeling alone and isolated, carry around birthday balloons with you and watch as random strangers smile at you and even wish you a happy birthday. Best part is it doesn’t even have to be your birthday. -reddit anon

In social situations, casually mention that you have never tried a certain food or drink before (even if you have). People will often insist that they buy it for you, especially if they have mentioned that it is one of their favorites. –scarlettliadan

Want a free meal? Tell a catering company or restaurant that you’re getting married and they will give you a tasting. –pokerchef24

When roomies are taking up all of the internet bandwidth, start downloading something very strenuous. With their bandwidth being gone, they will resort to something other than internet out of frustration. –dascissorsman

Want free booze on your flight? Use the bathroom at the front of the aircraft and grab a wine bottle from the cart station intended for first class customers. –plazenby740t

In that second after the article loads before the paywall pops up, hold down “Ctrl” and quickly press “A” then “C.” Now paste the article into word and read it for free. –illQualmOnYourFace

When spending time with friends and acquaintances, always be sure to bring along a pair of tweezers and small baggies to collect discarded cigarette butts, toothpicks, napkins, etc. You never know when you might need to plant DNA at a crime scene. –YborOgre

If you’re renting and make a mark on the wall, change the date on your phone and take a picture to show it was like that when you moved in. –SaneYossarian

Love a dish from a restaurant and want to make it at home, but can’t find a mock recipe? Call the restaurant, tell them you’re eating there tonight, and that you have strict dietary guidelines. They’ll list you everything that’s in it. –McCardboard

Flight attendant making you check your carry on bag? Tell her there is a lithium ion battery inside and then she will check someone else’s bag instead as lithium ion batteries can only go in carry on luggage. –IncendiaryGames

Interview for a bunch of jobs that you know you won’t accept to build your interview skills. –SharksPreedateTrees

At a career fair? Follow around someone you know is considerably worse than yourself to make you look better to potential employers. –aprenis

If you wear makeup to work everyday and want to get sent home “sick”, just go to the bathroom and wash it off mid-shift or come to work not wearing any, and say you don’t feel 100%. They will be so used to how you look with it on, the uneven skin tone will make you look unwell to them. –ForgetfulLucy28

Have an empty bottle you don’t need? Place it on the ground and a homeless person can take it to trade in for money. Win-win!  –binyourself

Want free stuff? Go to any CVS and buy items that offer “Extra Bucks” rewards only to return them saying you didn’t want them, then use your “Extra Bucks” to shop completely free! –xByron

Need a blender bottle for protein? Next time you’re at the gym tell them you left one. The lost and found is stocked with them. –fuckyouthereisnogod

Bombarded with people bothering you? Always be “away” except for 1 hour of the day, and make it a known secret so people will only talk to you at that time of day. –AloofExchangeability

Don’t have a Costco membership? Use Costco gift cards for free access. –This_kid_

If someone is taking too long in the shower, turn the hot water on in another room. They’ll think they used up all the hot water and rush to finish. –OnlyEnemiesSpyOnYou

If you buy Girl Scoot Cookies, don’t tell anyone you live with. –sai_vip (This one isn’t so much an unethical life-hack as it is common sense, but it bears keeping in mind. Hoard those cookies!)

Hate a cramped dinner table? When dining in a group, always make a reservation for one extra person over the actual group size. Guarantees extra room. –AaronGOATdon

Wanna mess with someone’s computer? Take a screenshot of the desktop, set it as the wallpaper and turn the icons invisible. –Nortmar

If you have telemarketers calling you, pretend to be another telemarketer and scam them back. Bonus points for how much of their time you waste. –FockerXC