30 of the Best Things Ever Found On a Receipt | 22 Words

Smart shoppers and diners know they should check their receipts to make sure that nothing went wrong with their transaction.

But what you don’t expect to find — whether you’re the purchaser, the seller, or the server — is something that will make you either laugh, shake your head, or demand an explanation more than a refund.

Need proof? Here’s the paper trail — literally.

Beware

via: Reddit

You've been warned. But if they're decent ninjas, you won't even be able to see them.

Do a Little Dance

via: Funny Receipts

So do they do a little dance when they deliver your food or is that just an unfortunate abbreviation? Either way, it costs you $7.

Read Between the Lines

via: Imgur

Not only do they appreciate your business, they appreciate the fact that you have, shall we say, "eclectic" tastes.

She's the Diary Queen

via: Imgur

Not only do you get the MILF for only $2.98, but you get the whole MILF, not just certain parts. Who wants a 2% MILF anyway?

It Really Satisfies

via: Reddit

Wow, they're really branching out with candy flavors. Do you have to show ID for that?

Multiple Choice

via: Blogspot

Considering this is a receipt for Swingers — which I assume isn't a playground for children — I'm thinking "ass" might just come up a little more than in other places.

Extra, Extra

via: Viral Circus

What can we say? Michael Scott would be proud of them for sticking that in there. (That's what she said.)

Child's Play

via: Imgur

It's not every day you get rewarded with a discount for having good kids, not to mention the fact they're inviting you to taste win. Win-win!

Yo Mama

via: Reddit

You have to admit that you would probably want to go back a few more times just to see what other jokes they would leave. Without yo mama, of course.

Nailed It

via: Sharenator

It turns out that Trade Secret's real secret is that they have a little racy business going on on the side. That leaves me wondering if "nail smoother" is now code for something else...

Deep Thoughts

via: Imgur

And you know you're not going to bring the donut back, so why is paper and ink involved? Probably to entertain you while you eat your delicious donut.

Geeking Out

via: Flickr

Does that come with a side of Nerds? Or maybe a couple of Airheads?

Grease the Wheel

via: Reddit

How about a preventative measure, you know, just in case she's a little bit difficult. Just because we have to deal with her doesn't mean you have to!

Beer Me

via: Flickr

I'll have your cheapest ass beer, and keep them coming!

A Hero!

via: Imgur

She found a snake on the floor in California Pizza Kitchen so she took it and tossed it outside. When she walked back in, everyone applauded.

Butt...Why?

via: Blogspot

The bad news? You ordered anal juice. The good news? It was free!

A Star!

via: Imgur

And he would do anything for love... ...but he won't do that.

Yo!

via: Huffington Post

Just in case there's any confusion as to how to make a smoothie, they give you specific directions. So helpful!

Poetry In Motion

via: Imgur

They can be easy. Sometimes they make perfect sense. But not this one here.

What a Deal!

via: Huffington Post

For the low price of $3.99, you too can bring home your very own wife! Sorry, no returns or exchanges. What's done is done.

Room Service

via: Pinterest

Now that's a creative tip for a hard-working hotel housekeeper. Honest Abe, getting a little bit freaky there in the sheets. Who knew?

Shallow Savings

via: Imgur

Well, that's disappointing. I guess nice guys really don't finish first.

That's a Wrap

via: Banned In Hollywood

Apparently that's now a quantifiable measurement for lunchmeat. Good news for you. Bad news for the turkey.

Out of This World

via: Imgur

Just think... If those customers hadn't been jerks, this server might never had received such a masterpiece. Faith restored!

Tommy Boy

via: Imgur

He's not just Tom. Tom is as MAN, and don't you forget it.

Lube It Up

via: Huffington Post

To be clear, they bought bike supplies and tennis balls. What else were you thinking?

High and Mighty

via: Twitter

The bummer is that your tip is rolled up like drug paraphernalia, but at least you could get a good chuckle from it.

Getting the Greens

via: Imgur

Yes, will you please toss my salad? See above: That's what she said.

Take It

via: Reddit

When you let customers draw on the paper tablecloths, you're going to get some creative tips. The beer probably helps, too.

Here kitty, kitty...

via: Reddit

Think of the kittens! So many poor felines wandering around without proper paw protection!