You can order some weird things on Amazon. Embarrassing stuff that you'd rather not buy in person. Funky gadgets specifically designed for your kitchen. Things that look questionable but are actually completely innocent.
And now, just straight-up weird stuff. Products that you didn't even think existed — but they totally do, and you totally want them.
We hope you find these products as awesome as we do. Just an FYI: 22Words is a participant in the Amazon affiliate program and may receive a share of sales from links on this page.
Like This Beard Apron That Catches Your Trimmings
This is one of the many weird things on Amazon involving facial hair. If you live with someone who shaves their face, you know the frustration of finding tiny beard hairs all over your bathroom sink. This clever invention catches all those whiskers so they can be disposed of easily.
This Bacon Floss Might Actually Get You to Floss
Almost everyone loves bacon, but does everyone love the weird things on amazon that are bacon flavored? It's floss that's flavored like bacon. It's crazy, but it just might work. Your dentist will certainly thank you.
This Mullet Sweatband Completes Any Outfit
via: AmazonYou might be thinking that you have no use for a sweatband with the "party in the back" half a mullet attached to it. That's where you're wrong, friend. You need this.
These Tongue Scrapers Are the Key to Eliminating Bad Breath
Most of the bacteria that cause bad breath are on your tongue, and your toothbrush doesn't do a great job of getting them all. These tongue scrapers do, though! Grab one of these weird things on Amazon for fresh breath.
This Nicolas Cage Pillowcase Needs No Explanation
This may be at the top of weird things on Amazon. I mean, obviously you want a Nicolas Cage pillowcase. I don't need to convince you of this. You know it to be true. It'll be the national treasure of your home.
These Subtle Butt Fart Pads Make Your Life Less Stinky
via: AmazonStick one of these reusable pads exactly where you're assuming it goes, and, um, let 'er rip. They're embedded with charcoal which neutralizes odors.
This Baby Foot Peel Is Freaky But EffectivePlace the Baby Feet plastic socks over your feet for an hour, and in a few days, your dead, calloused skin will slough off, revealing the baby-soft feet you've always wanted.
Did You Know You Could Buy 1,500 Ladybugs on Amazon?!
via: Amazon'Cause you totally can. Apparently, they're excellent garden predators who will munch on pests like aphids and thrips. Or you can send them to someone as a prank. I'm not here to tell you how to live your life.
This Blanket Looks Like a Giant Tortilla
Finally, you can fulfill your dream of being wrapped into a burrito! This microfiber blanket is super soft and plush. It's also a great way to stay cozy while also being dressed up as food.
This Beard Beanie Will Keep Your Whole Head Warm
via: AmazonWearing a winter hat is smart, but wearing a winter hat with a built-in beard? Absolutely genius. After all, you want to keep your face warm, too! If you can't grow a beard, this hat literally has you covered.
These Elf Ear Earbuds Let You Cosplay and Rock out at the Same Time
via: AmazonYou know what's cooler than an elf? An elf who listens to sweet tunes. These earbuds have soft elf ears attached to them so you can dress up while you enjoy your jams.
This Bacon Lip Balm Is Almost as Good as Just Eating Bacon
Another one of the weird things on Amazon that are bacon flavored. With none of the calories! Who doesn't want the taste of bacon on their lips at all times? Nobody. That's who.
Admit It: You Need These Hand Finger Puppets
via: AmazonNeed a hand? How about five of them? I'll be honest, I don't know exactly what you could use these for, but I think they're a smart purchase all the same. High 25!
This Bar of Soap Makes So Much Sense
via: AmazonUse one side for your butt and the other for your face. It's as simple as that. Never wonder about where your bar of soap has been again.
This Farting Animals Coloring Book Lets You Appreciate Animals in Their Most Hilarious Form
via: AmazonAnimals are great, but farting animals? Come on. Way better. Every single picture in this coloring book features an animal overcome with flatulence. If that doesn't sound like something that should be in your home, I just don't know what to tell you.
This Poo Pen Is...Really Something
via: AmazonLook at it this way: Your coworkers probably won't want to steal this one from your desk. That's something!
This Ravioli Spoon Rest Is Just Plain Adorable
via: AmazonSpoon rests are great because they keep your countertops from getting covered in sauce. Ravioli spoon rests are great because they're shaped like ravioli!
This Cat Butt Purse Is Purrfect for Animal Lovers
via: AmazonI'm guessing that before today, you probably didn't know such a thing existed. Well, it does. This purse features a small pocket that can hold your phone, keys, and wallet, but the real draw is the design itself. It's a cat's butt! You probably knew that already, though.
These Handerpants Are the Perfect Accessory
via: AmazonNo outfit is complete without a pair of underpants made specifically for your hands. Dress them up or down depending on the occasion!
This Yodeling Pickle Provides Hours of Entertainment
via: AmazonYou like yodeling. You like pickles. But have you ever thought to combine the two?! This is a great gift for the person who has everything except a yodeling pickle. Batteries are included!
Give Yourself a Spa-Like Experience with This Face Mask
via: AmazonThis Korean rubber mask is called "Firming Lover" so you pretty much know it's gonna be good. It includes a moisturizing serum and the mask itself. Leave the mask on for 30–40 minutes for best results.
This Wooden Bowtie Is Quirky Yet Classy
via: AmazonA bowtie is a very classy look. If it's made of wood, it really takes things up a notch! Also? Much easier to "tie."
This To-Do List Expresses How You Really Feel
via: AmazonWe've all got "Crap To Do" and "Crap To Buy." Why not keep track of it on a fun note pad?
This Cat Brush Lets You Pretend to Lick Your Cat
via: AmazonWhat more could you possibly want? It provides a feline bonding experience like you wouldn't believe. You might not want to use it in public, though.
This Cake Decorating Pencil Is So Clever!
via: AmazonAdd your icing to the pencil then press down on the eraser to dispense it. This is a great way to get some extra detail in your cake or cupcake decorations.
This Hardboiled Egg Mold Is Part of a Complete Balanced Breakfast
via: AmazonHardboiled eggs are an excellent source or protein. Hardboiled eggs shaped like dinosaur skulls are an excellent source of entertainment.
You Need This Bag of Edible Bugs for Your Next Game of Truth or Dare
via: AmazonThe bag includes a mixture of grasshoppers, crickets, silkworms, and Sago worms, all of which have been boiled and dehydrated (rather than fried). If you've ever wanted to try eating bugs, now's the time.
This Egg Separator Is Shaped Like a Pig!
via: AmazonSqueeze pig. Suck up egg yolk. It's as easy as that. If you have to separate eggs, you might as well do it with something cute, right?
This Steamer Is Also Inspired by Pigs
via: AmazonPlace this silicone steamer lid on top of a bowl of veggies and pop the whole thing in the microwave. Then, have fun watching the steam come out of the pig's nostrils!
Make Your Childhood Dreams Come True with This Bag of Cereal Marshmallows
via: AmazonWe all know that the marshmallows are the best part of a bowl of cereal, so why not have a bowl of just marshmallows? Well, you're an adult with money. Now you can.
These Red Clay Insoles Massage Your Feet While You Walk
via: AmazonThe red clay also absorbs odors, keeping your feet feeling good and smelling fresh.
These Cork Lights Turn Your Bottles into Mood Lighting
via: AmazonThis listing is for a set of six light-up corks. They can be recharged to keep the party going.
This Gummy Bear Weighs 5 Pounds!
via: AmazonYou say you like gummy bears, but do you love them enough to eat one that weighs 5 whole pounds? I believe in you.
The Fondoodler Is a Hot Glue Gun for Cheese
via: AmazonStick some cheese in the Fondoodler, heat it up, and voila! You can now draw and write with the cheese, or use it to add some structural integrity to your cracker castle.
You're Sure to Have a Blast with The Airzooka
via: AmazonThe Airzooka blows a harmless ball of air at any target. It's sure to blow your friends away.
This Grape Slicer Makes Quick Work of Grapes
via: AmazonIf you ever need to slice a bunch of grapes (or grape tomatoes!) in a hurry, this gadget is the ideal tool. Pop a grape in, push the plunger down, and your grapes are magically halved.
This Corn Thresher Is a Summertime Must-Have
via: AmazonSure, you could use your teeth to remove the corn kernels from the cob, but wouldn't this be way more fun?