50 Marriage Memes Your Spouse Doesn't Want You To See | 22 Words

Ah, marriage. In many ways, it's a true joy: feeling that level of commitment to someone you love, knowing you're building your lives together, that feeling of someone constantly having your back - it all sounds pretty hard to beat.

But, on the other hand, sometimes marriage kind of, well, sucks. Being so close to your spouse means that they have a pretty unique ability to get under your skin. And for those moments, it's nice to feel like you aren't alone in just being over your nuptials. Here are fifty of the best marriage-related memes to get you through the tough times - and to help you keep it together until you come out the other side.

When you need to manage expectations.

Marriage is not all rainbows and unicorns, people!

When you feel you're in it alone.

Surely your partner must have done laundry before you came into their life - right?

When things have changed.

The stereotype about the spark vanishing after marriage exists for a reason, after all.

When things get stale.

It's easy to have good intentions - but the reality is, marriage is tiring.

When you have to wait your turn.

Hopefully this dude's wife will be more understanding now that she knows he was left empty-handed. (Empty-brain'ded?)

When you're stunned into silence.

It's easy to forget that, if you're old enough to be married, you're old enough to eat gummy bears whenever you want.

When you disagree on what's important.

Maybe Karen just doesn't think the dog is getting married for the right reasons?

Two partners, united against a common enemy.

No one tells you that when give birth to a kid, you're also giving birth to a creature whose sole biological purpose is to replace you.

Sharing is an important skill to learn.

Plus, daddies look very pretty wearing the princess crown. That's facts.


What... what are you trying to say here exactly?

This guy knows how to dad.

It's so wild — you can spend your entire life hating puns, and the second you become a dad, it's the only kind of joke you're capable of telling.

It's all falling into place...

Just imagine how quick he'd ask to do the shopping if you stopped buying pork rinds (the other husband mainstay).

An attempt to be sexy was made.

A valiant attempt, sir. But it was simply not your day.

She's going to be so mad.

What is it about having your wife look for something you can't find that determines whether or not you're a valid human being?

"And here you'll find the coat closet, where we keep coats."

Poor husbands. Anything outside their immediate field of vision is lost to them forever.

There's a reasonable explanation.

Yes, it is our gender that determines whether we let being sick make us into sobbing, crabby little toddlers. That's it.

"No I cannot pause it."

And they always talk during a good part too, like when The Joker is talking to Two-Face in the hospital in The Dark Knight. (That's the best scene in any movie.)

My man got roasted.

You can tell this is a new marriage because after a number of years together, she's not going to whisper.

"Who's a good boy?!"

Listen, at least the dog will never call you their "weird roommate"...

"General! The pun threshold is critical!"

Dads and puns: name a more iconic couple.

A day we will never forget.

This is even bigger than the Super Bowl — this guy's wife actually accomplished something herself. She didn't watch two teams of 53 millionaires clip coupons on CBS.

Aww, a sweet one!

Or, the less sweet interpretation is that the husband was just going to wolf down whatever was in front of him anyway, so he didn't care what it was.

Modern problems require modern solutions.

Sorry, that's the law: you click "Can't Go" on Facebook, you cannot go to that event. This wife's plan has backfired spectacularly.

This sure escalated fast.

Me, I would've just stopped after she said "don't tweet that." But then again, I love my wife. So.


This picture makes it look like this guy sleeps in a mausoleum.

"And I just went to the store for these!"

This is an extreme example, but if wives weren't there to stop them from wasting everything, husbands would use an entire roll of paper towels every day just carrying around their many, many chicken sandwiches so they don't have to get a plate dirty.

A true conundrum.

Might I suggest... pointing behind him and taking his grilled cheese when he looks away.

Burn these tapes.

Do... do wives really love gravy boats? I would not have guessed.

This is accurate.

Or, if they really love each other, they take their anger about parking so far away and bury it deep and never talk about it.

"We mentioned this in our vows, honey."

Take the hint, hubby. Couldn't be more clear.

Look at this jerk, chewing like that.

What's funny is, I can't imagine doing anything being more arrogant than chewing bubblegum at all, ever.

"We are having guests."

What if the firemen talk to Belinda down the street? Ugh, she's already so judge-y.

Let's get it straight.

The cat prefers intellectually stimulating conversation, such the current state of the Dow Jones.

Is this the best use of our time here?

It's important to remember that, for some people, offering snacks is their love language.

Some husbands are very mean.

Read the room, hus-bo. That was not the right thing to say.

I would have a great answer.

A lot of husbands not only know how lazy they can be, they also push to be even more lazy, so as to be the laziest man in their friend group. Like all things are for men, it's a competition.

"This is important to me."

"Heck, put it on my grave too. If you don't have room, go ahead and cut the 'Beloved Husband & Father' part."

When you go above and beyond.

It's so weird — all men hate puns until they get married. Then, they suddenly become the funniest things in the world...

When you find out what's the line.

Maybe she was buying the dog a wedding present?

When you have to buy something.

When you go out to the store, you always think you'll remember everything you need. But you won't... of course you won't...

When you're trying to keep it super casual.

Man, if I had a nickel for every time I had to tell my wife to stop screaming. Am I right fellas? (It is not a sign of a healthy marriage if one member is constantly screaming.)

When you can't shift gears.

Sometimes, your partner will do something so irksome, it'll even seep over into sexy time.

When you're stuck in limbo and need to make a call.

Officially, it depends on how good the show is. If this is Better Call Saul we're talking about? Three minutes. Big Bang theory? Just go ahead and watch something else.

When it's time to call a spade a spade.

Listen, this dude's been coasting off his one meal for tooooooo long. Tiue to buck up and make a casserole, my dude.

When there is very much a wrong way.

Dude, you put it in upside down and got milk all over everything! Don't make this into a cute tweet! It is legit disgusting in the fridge right now!

When you have something to tell them...

I've always dreamed of owning a penguin, but do we know if they're nice or not? When 101 Dalmatians was popular, I remember hearing about people getting dalmatians and finding out that they were actually kind of mean. Don't want a similar thing to happen here.

When you forget to use Incognito Mode.

There's a simple solution here — ask your wife to come along with you to the place where the wolves are.

When you're very proud of the name you came up with.

Although, is it that distinguishing a feature to say that he likes Cocoa Puffs? We all like Cocoa Puffs.

When you're at your wit's end.

It could be worse — she could have a sick husband and one thousand babies. And those babies could get sick!

When you can't help but think about what you'd spend the money on...

I'm sure this woman loves her husband, but if there's anything she could one day come to love even more, it's money.

When they don't see the whole picture.

This is a solid bro move. Dogs need to see Air Bud, so they can grow up believing in themselves. representation in film matters so much.

When you try to be romantic.

This tweet would be a lot funnier if the economy was better and the odds weren't very much in favor of him having been fired.

When you've got to calls 'em like you sees 'em.

My mom actually delivered me while in a full body cast, so check. Mate.

When you need some space right then and there.

To be fair to this wife, she had been going 120mph just before she pushed him. Slowing down to a speed that wouldn't for sure kill her husband was this wife's way of saying she loved him.

When you're just plain wrong.

I mean, he did say "gruel."

When you start thinking about how much things cost.

And it certainly doesn't help that you keep throwing away all the paper towels to use the leftover cardboard tubes to play pirate!

When you lose your voice.

This man needs to learn to assert himself in a way that projects both confidence and kindness. And the first step is to ask his wife if that's okay.

When you're just trying to snack.

But let's be honest here — this guy should have made a few extra cheese & crackers. Worst case, he's got a solution to the problem he found himself in. Best case? Extra cheese & crackers. There is no downside.

When you need to get the facts straight.

But also, don't worry about it. The detectives will figure out what happened. It's their job. Don't deny them the opportunity to do their job.

When you've found The One.

Aww, this is so sweet! Lazy, but sweet!

When it all starts to click.

"Wait a minute... she was using that extra grocery money... to buy food... I actually like?"

When you achieve a dream.

No one eats like Gaston/ pulls off feats like Gaston/ no one chows on a turkey on wheat like Gaston.

When you think you know, but you have no idea.

How are you supposed to do that adult business in a room with dirty carpets?

When you've done all you can do.

Gonna need a little more information on what kind of fancy socks those are before I can make a ruling as to whether or not this endeavor will be successful.

When you start to notice something worrying.

Similarities between your spouse and your kid are super adorable - until they aren't.

When you aren't in the mood to share.

Although he'll quickly stop smiling when he learns how much that tiny little tub costs.

When you're not on the same page.

Why is it that one of you gets to be the "fun one" while the other has to be sensible?

When they can't do anything right.

Bro, you had one job.

When you've simply had enough.

"I bought those essential oils for a reason."

When you can't get your story straight.

Sometimes, all you're asking for is your spouse to read your mind - and that's not unreasonable!

When you don't share the same interests.

Sometimes, you just can't get on board with your spouse's favorites - and that's ok!

When you can't be bothered.

Sometimes you just aren't in the mood to hear about the "crazy thing" that happened at work.

When you know what they're good for.

Sure, you despise everything about them - but you despise spiders just a little bit more.

When you realize you've married a giant baby.

Although the satisfaction of pointing out something literally right in front of their eyes makes it almost worth it.

When you have a different kind of secret.

Is there anything sexier than eating chocolate in bed?

When you misinterpret your role.

Being part of a duo does tend to mean one of you takes the lead - and here's a hint: it's never you.

When you learn a valuable lesson.

A good spouse is never a hype man. In fact, they're usually quite the opposite.

When you need to take a stance.

Don't be secretive about your selfishness - display it, loud and proud.

When they're always in the way.

It's actually incredible how a spouse can always manage to stand in exactly the wrong place.

When you can go one of two ways.

Marriage is either pure love, or pure hatred - there's no in-between.

When you see who wears the trousers.

Although we can't really see any sensible argument against two kittens.

When you weaponize your knowledge.

Once you know how to annoy your partner, you can pretty much get whatever you want from them.

When you know them better than they know themselves.

If you've ever struggled to carry a cart-load full of groceries in your arms, you'll understand.

When you have to choose your story.

Sometimes, it's easier to go with a lie rather than reveal a highly embarrassing truth.

When you have to take the bad with the good.

It could be worse! We're not sure how - but we're sure it could be.

When the lines of reality blur.

Sure, he wasn't cognizant of what he did wrong - but that's not the point!

When you just get them.

Hey, if she doesn't even answer calls from the supposed love of her life, what chance does a random phone number have?

When you sweat the small stuff.

But hey, at least these two have managed to keep their disagreements civil.

When you notice a shift.

Remember when you hated going to sleep without them next to you? Nope, us neither.

When you take arguments to the next level.

Sure, the milk negotiations can be tense - but leave the fridge magnets out of it!

When you look on the bright side.

If you've ever felt trapped in your marriage, just think, there's a fifty-fifty chance it'll all be over soon.

When you have your priorities in order.

Listen, shopping for a gift for someone else is a stressful business, and deserves rewards.

When life is a constant competition.

"Hey! If you think you've got it bad, listen to this ..."

When they can't quite let it go.

What else are you supposed to do if you come up with a salient point when the argument has (technically) ended?

When you realize what's important.

Sometimes, the greatest gift a spouse can give you is some time to yourself.

When you need to compromise.

Toothpaste can be a controversial business - but not one worth ending a marriage over.

When the honeymoon is over.

Sure, you love them with all your heart - but you wouldn't be sad to take a teeny little break from them, either.

When your spouse is a liar.

Sometimes it truly feels as though they're out to get you.

When you realize everyone is terrible.

Even the love of your life eats their cereal too loudly, we're afraid.

When you're always suspicious.

It's nice to be nice - but for the love of God, don't be too nice, got it?

When their expectations are too high.

Listen, incredible a person as you are, you aren't an all-seeing oracle - and the sooner your spouse gets that, the better.

When you get excited by different things.

Just thinking about the array of snacks lining the aisles gets your heart racing.

When you understand one another.

Funny business? No way. Meat-filled corn shells? Now you're talking.

When you lower your expectations.

Not too low though - HGTV is still a necessity.

When you hit a rough patch.

Hey, if you pass the IKEA test, you know you've found yourself a winner.

When you can't stop comparing.

The good thing about tweets like these is they remind us all we aren't alone.

When you know your place.

You might be the love of her life - but you're also not good enough for the fancy towels, got it?

When you celebrate small victories.

When times are tough, it's key to remember that you're a team.

When they're up to no good.

You'd think at the very least they'd ask if you were interested in the part first.

And when you've learned the secret to a happy marriage.

Who would have known it was all so deceptively simple! And if you enjoyed these marriage-related tweets, you're going to love the jokes people have made about parenthood.