Disney World: It's the happiest place on Earth, right? From the mind-blowing attractions to the spellbinding firework displays, Disney Parks are totally magical.
But there is one thing that tends to ruin the magic: people.
Shockingly enough, people who have been walking around in 90-degree weather, drinking adult beverages tend to behave poorly. From selfish behavior to terrorizing the characters to engaging in less-than-wholesome activities in the parks, Disney employees have seen humanity at its worst. The following horror stories from Disney "cast members" will shock you, enrage you, and make you snort with laughter.
But it probably won't make you want to book a trip to a Florida theme park anytime soon.
"I was a Tinker Bell performer for WDW about 3 years ago and can't count how many times people asked me what was under my dress or tried to grope me.""I would always shame them to my attendant, their family and the people in line by loudly exclaiming: "You want to know what's under my dress? Well there's pixie dust of course!" or "This man is a pirate! He's trying to reach the pixie dust that I keep under my dress!" ...and they'd walk away in shame like the creepy assholes they are."-Little-Bones
"Many years ago I interned at Walt Disney World in Orlando.""One night I went out with a smoking hot girl that interned at Epcot Center. She lived in the Walt Disney World corporate housing at Little Lake Bryan. After a night of dancing, I dropped her off at her place. I thought it was weird that I had to show ID at a guard house and I could only stay one hour since I was not residing there. Later on, I heard that Disney had tight security because they broke up a prostitution ring there a few years earlier."-Disneydistopianharem
"The dumbest story I have is about a woman who exited the ride where I worked and discovered "wet stuff" coming from the sky."
"The woman came up to me and told me that she didn’t like the wet stuff coming from the sky and that I should tell my boss to turn it off. At first, I laughed because I thought she was kidding, which only pissed her off more.
“Don’t they know that this stuff ruins people’s vacations?" she said.
“We have no way of controlling the rain, ma’am. This is Florida and we get quick storms like this in the summer, but it might go away after a while," I said.
“What about the bubble?" she said.
Apparently, she thought that all of Disney was under a big bubble and we controlled the weather. I confirmed that there was no bubble, that this was the real deal. She walked away insisting that something should be done about it."-unicornCornUnique
"I worked at Club Disney for the brief time it was open."
"We had codes we used on the radio headsets that were coordinated with character names. For instance, code Baloo meant there was blood that needed to be cleaned up immediately.
One day, I'm taking a stroll around the club to check on things when I spot a small boy about two years old taking a massive dump right in the middle of the play area. He sees me, starts to cry, and runs away with no clothing on the lower half of his body.
I get on the radio and can't think of what to say as we hadn't discussed a code for "human feces in the play area and a naked kid running around." So I just called, "I have a code Pooh situation in the play area and Piglet's on the loose."-in_the_vortex
"When I was working the front of a character line I saw a Make-A-Wish complaint happen.""The guy who was next in line shouted, "I wish my kid was dying so we could skip lines too!" How disgusting, right? What ensued was one of the most amazing things I've ever seen. The ENTIRE line of people who heard it began booing him, shouting at him to get out of the park, and then as a group of about 45 followed him around for an hour complaining to his face until he couldn't take it anymore and left the park."-AnOfferYouCantRefuse
"We had a guy nicknamed Smiley that liked to pleasure himself on rides."
"We were told to look out for him and report it to the appropriate people if we saw him. I saw him once while on the tram but thankfully not during the act.
Buuuut legend has it he was finally caught after trying to pleasure a horse on Main Street."-kva1
"My sister's friend was kissed directly on the mouth by a gross adult man who took advantage of the fact that she couldn't break character."
"She plays one of the princesses and after collecting herself for a second said that she didn't think her prince would appreciate it."-[deleted]
"I worked in Frontierland at MK and there was this woman who randomly started dancing in front of Splash Mountain.""Now, it normally wouldn't be an issue, but she was wearing a dress, nothing underneath, and started doing flips and flashing people. When some managers/security tried to round her up, she started running and yelling how her bf was Peter Pan and she was just waiting for him to take her back to Neverland. It was a fun day." -werekitty93
I used to work at the box office. I once had a woman come up and ask for a ticket into Disneyland. She then placed a box on the counter while looking for her wallet.""IDK how she managed to get that box past security. I see a picture on it and then I see dates and realize that they are the ashes of (I'm assuming) her little girl. I had to keep her at my window while I waited for security. It broke my heart but a lot of people like to dump ashes on rides and it literally just gets vacuumed up at the end of the night."-
"Most people who worked at WDW-MK in the early 2000s heard of or met Towel Baby."
"Several times a week a couple with annual passes came to the Magic Kingdom with what appeared to be a swaddled infant. However, if you looked closely, the woman was carrying a rolled up towel wrapped in a hospital newborn blanket.
The man was always very gentle, leading his wife through security and into the park. I'm not certain if they went on rides but I know for sure that they always asked for a table for three at restaurants.
The story/legend was that the couple had lost an infant in years prior and the woman fell into a deep depression and became delusional. The only thing that kept her somewhat functional was fussing over this towel and coming to the Magic Kingdom." - bibbityboppityburner
"As a space mountain cast member at WDW, we all would rotate positions every 45 minutes.""I was at load (where people start the ride) and this guy was very nervous in line, arguing with his friends in another language (maybe Portuguese?). He got on the rocket, even though he seemed nervous and before I sent him off, I made sure he wanted to go. He nodded and continued into light speed (27 mph btw). After a few minutes, the ride was emergency stopped and a code that was familiar but I couldn’t recognize was called over the intercom. I saw my supervisor sprinting downstairs to the doors to the ride. He had gotten off the ride. He had just decided to get off. The creepy part of this story is that we all searched the building for about an hour (lights on, about 50 people searching) and no one found him. So this man got off the ride, went down about 200 steps, and somehow found the exit- never to be seen by us again."-mangojonesss
"I work at WDW as a Cast Member. The worst was one night during the fireworks exit, we had a bunch of twenty-year-olds being dumb a**** on the resort platform."
"They start punching each other in the arms, being the usual pricks to each other. One of them ended up missing his friend and cold clocking a 12-year-old girl. The 12-year-old girl's dad had to be 6' 4" and 320 pounds. And built. I mean really built.
It took 4 security guards and 2 orange county deputies to pull the guy off the bloody pulp that remained of the kid. His friend ended up jumping into the bushes to get away from one seriously angry father."-monorail_pilot
"When I worked at Wilderness Lodge we had a guest that was visiting the Fort Wilderness Campgrounds.""He stripped down to his red boxer shorts outside one of the restaurant windows and then proceeded to run through the campground from security. Somehow he found a backpack leaf blower and put it on and continued to escape security. They finally found him passed out in a utility shed all curled up to that leaf blower wearing nothing but his boxers and covered in scratches from the woods."-juricajourneys
"I worked as a cast member in Magic Kingdom stands-east (Tomorrowland and Fantasyland).""Whenever taking a break backstage, I would get an earful from the face characters. Most notably, Bert from Mary Poppins making out with Aladdin and scheduling sex later that day. I’ve also chatted up Minnie Mouse who told me she has been peed on, thrown up on, kicked, bitten, hit, and stabbed by kids over the course of 8 years as a fur character."-LeafysWiffle
"My sister had a job in a store at WDW throughout college.""She said one time in a gift store, a parent asked if their son with cancer could meet Darth Vader. After my sister told them her store does not have a Darth Vader costume or even any Star Wars memorabilia, they freaked out and asked for her manager. After about an hour of waiting the child is greeted by my sister in a Darth Vader costume that came from across the park in a Star Wars section. Once greeted, the parent told the child, 'I knew we wouldn't have to walk to the other side of the park! I love cancer.'"-Binack
"I was a safari driver at the Kilimanjaro Safari attraction in Animal Kingdom.""We had this elephant named Willy. Willy was an exhibitionist. I was driving a safari one day, spewing out facts about elephants when I hear a tiny voice from the back of the truck yell, "MOOOOM! HE HAS FIVE LEGS!!!" I turn, and sure enough, there's Willy, standing with his five-foot-long dick just swaying in the Florida breeze. I had to turn my mic off, I was laughing so hard."-DorothyGaleEsq
"I was working in the kitchen at Cinderella's castle when this family of 4 came in for their dinner.""About halfway through the dinner, the husband politely stands up and taps his glass for attention. He announces that his wife of 15 years has been cheating on him for over a year. The entire place stood still in shock. He motioned for his kids, paid the waitress and left his wife crying at the table."-Azov237
"We had a lady try to smuggle an infant onto Indy at DL one time.""She put a huge jacket on (in the summer) and stuffed her child down near the bottom in an attempt to look pregnant. Several cast members warned her that it is not recommended that pregnant women go on the ride, but she insisted, and we couldn't stop her. So she manages to get on the Jeep and puts the seat belt on, and that was when her stomach started screaming and crying."-Atheistpiece
"Someone had left an abandoned bag at the base of Space Mountain for more than 15 minutes, so we followed the normal security procedures and they brought a bomb dog out to sniff it.""When our Pluto came to check the bag, he sniffed it and then sat down, which signals there is something wrong with this bag. So we had to evacuate all of Tomorrowland, literally all of the attractions/stores/restaurants, and all the CMs (cast members) were standing at all the entrances freaking out because no, of course, we were sure a bomb was going to go off and we would all die. Turned out that the backpack was just forgotten, full of carne asada burritos, and Pluto sat down because he thought he was getting a treat."-steakandasideofsteak
"When I worked on Space Mountain circa 2003, Tom Cruise came on Space Mountain with his then-girlfriend Penelope Cruz and her family."
"His group gets on the ride, they go have fun, and they come back to the station. As is standard procedure, we asked if they wanted to stay in the car and ride again. This is so they don't have to get out, just to immediately reboard. (star privilege!)
We dispatch the car, and as it starts to move forward, Penolope's non-English speaking family starts flipping out. Apparently, they didn't want to go again. So they stand up. This causes us to press the button to stop the cars.
Alarms start going off. Everyone but the people who work the ride are flipping out. Beeping, yelling, good times.
Anyway, we release the "station stop." I have to manually tug the car to the next spot in the station, via the passenger handlebar in the front. This is when my hand came in contact with Tom Cruises's.
I never washed it again."-MykeXero
"I was in line at Disney Land California with a group of Japanese teenage tourists were ahead of me in line.""I speak Japanese, so I could understand that they were making fun of Americans. They were mostly saying things to the effect of "On TV they seem so cool, but all of these Americans are so fat and ugly." They were laughing and even occasionally pointing at people. I was just staying quiet but then one of the cast members who evidently also spoke Japanese walked up to them and told them in perfect Japanese "You guys should really be careful, most Americans can speak Japanese." They all froze up and looked around at people, many of whom were giving them dirty looks. I nodded at them like I was backing him up, and they were horrified. They all left the line promptly afterward."-O7Knight7O
"I was sitting with a group of guys by where Mickey and Minnie get dressed.""When they came out, the guys started cat-calling Minnie. The guy that was Mickey said, in a perfect Mickey voice, 'If you look at my girlfriend again I'm gonna pop ya!'"-[deleted]
"I worked a ride in Animal Kingdom a long time ago."
"Sawana 8-10 foot long snake emerge from an area with lots of plants and bushes. It slowly works it's way through a line of about 200 people. Weaving it's way through people's legs, strollers, bags, etc...then it just casually slips back into another wooded area.
No one noticed!"-[deleted]
"I was taking my paycheck to cash it at the Cast Member's bank, which is behind the real bank on Main Street."
"As I walked up, the gate that leads out to the street slammed open, and Donald Duck stomps through, followed by Minnie, Goofy, and a few other characters.
Donald ripped his head off, slammed it on the ground, and yelled, "Stupid kid, kicked me in the balls!"
I had to try to not laugh at the enraged, 4'6" actor in half a duck suit, out of fear that he'd kick ME in the balls."-Phantom_Scarecrow
"One day, a kid had eaten a bunch of pasta with marinara and then promptly threw it all up right in front of the entrance to Big Thunder Mountain. It was a huge pile of watery barf, easily 2 feet wide and 3 feet long."
"So we called custodial and set up a couple of trash cans to do our best to block the area off so people couldn't step in it.
This dude, wearing all white comes running down the path from the exit of the ride to try and get back into the line as soon as he can. We tried to yell at him to stop running, but it was too late.
He thought he would be a super cool guy and jump between the trash cans. He didn't count on there being a river of barf. So he jumps, lands in the barf and his legs slip out from under him, and he falls/rolls into all the red marinara barf. It took him a few seconds to comprehend what had just happened, but he eventually let out a blood-curdling scream."-atheistpiece
"I was a Jungle Cruise skipper during my time at Disneyland, and lots of crazy things happen in the jungle."
"They loaded a boat and sent it out into the jungle, as normal. The skipper got about halfway through the trip and out of nowhere, this Korean lady started screaming at the poor guy sitting in front of her. The skipper tried to calm the lady down, but she kept screaming and yelling at him (in Korean).
Then, she full-on attacks him. She lunged at him with claw hands and started scratching at his face and kicking him. He was doing his best to fend her off, but she was on him.
Basically, half the people on her boat were trying to hold this lady down while the guy she attacked was cowering in the back bleeding. Luckily, security had arrived and medical shortly after.
It took 3 security officers to eventually subdue the lady, while medical services strapped her down to a gurney.
Eventually, they got a translator and tried to talk to her and her family, and it turns out that the lady was schizophrenic and had decided that she wasn't taking her medication that day so she could try to better enjoy the park. She just happened to have an episode in the middle of the jungle, and the poor dude sitting in front of her got all the wrath."-atheistpiece
"One Christmas at EPCOT's Germany Pavilion I was "hanging out" with the Nutcracker."
"I would do photo meet and greets every hour. First set of the day I walk out in full gear, green pants, white knobs for hands.
First kid walks up to me, super excited! Being the short 6-year old that he was, he holds onto my leg for the picture. "Aww!" says his mom as she fumbles with the camera.
Then I feel it. While his mom takes a lifetime to snap the picture, the boy's hand begins to rise. I thought nothing of it until... "Say cheese!" GRAB!
She snaps the picture while I use all my energy not to make a sound or punch him with my ball hand. He releases, finally, turns to his mother and says:
'Mommy, mommy, IT'S A BOY NUTCRACKER!!'"-AnOfferYouCantRefuse