Gendered Products That Will Both Confuse and Enrage You

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Newsflash, people: men and women just aren’t the same. And luckily for us, companies have finally realized this and have started marketing gendered products that fit our unique needs. For the first time in history (or should I say “herstory”?), women are able to use power drills (they come in pink now!), take laxatives (sure they cost more but check out that sparkly packaging!) and write in their unicorn-covered diaries thanks to this pen designed specifically for a lady’s feminine fingers! But it’s not just the girls who are benefitting from this new marketing trend. Fellas are now allowed to use dish soap, sanitize their hands, and even use dryer sheets. Keep scrolling to see all the bizarrely gendered products that will confuse and enrage you.

Looking for more ridiculous products? These new Crocs are just what the doctor ordered. Or, should I say, just what the Colonel ordered?

…see what I did there?

When my man’s outfit gets a little hairy and he tries to reach for my lady lint roller, I always smack his hand away and hand him this one instead.

The same goes for my hand sanitizer. A man using a woman’s disinfectant? Not in my house!

I can’t tell you how thrilled I was to discover this product. Now I can dig the bloody, guts-covered hooks out of a dead trout and still feel cute.

If there’s one thing I care about, it’s whether or not my ear canals look pretty while I’m asleep. These earplugs have made all my dreams come true!

Can you imagine my embarrassment when I realized I’d been drinking men’s tea for years?! I’m sure I was a popular topic of conversation around the watercooler at work every time I made a mug of manly chamomile!

The look on my daughter’s face when I told her she was finally allowed to glue things was priceless.

Try to deny it all you want, but men and women just aren’t the same. Because he’s a man, my husband’s nose happens to be five times as large as mine, so these mansized tissues are a constant staple in our house during flu season.

Ever since we picked up a pack of these “men’s ultimate multi-tool” Q-tips my husband has been able to clean every nook and cranny of his body with ease. I wish I had a product like that!

My kids love cereal, but I’ve always felt uncomfortable with how gender-neutral most brands are. Now I can feel good about the horribly outdated gender stereotypes they’re consuming along with 8 tablespoons of sugar every morning.

After seeing this product in the grocery store I immediately made an emergency doctor’s appointment. It turns out, I’d been consuming the wrong type of protein for my entire life! Is there any way to reverse the devastating effects on my body?!

It’s a scientific fact that all girls love Princesses and all boys love race cars. And is there anything more appetizing than a pink cheese-flavored cracker?! My little Princess loves ’em!

Why would my little lady need to know how to be clever when she can just be gorgeous instead? “Get better grades”? “Improve your reading”? That’s boy stuff!

That silly boy! Doesn’t he know that hands, feet, stars, and suns are reserved only for girls?!

I am a QUEEN and my teeth will be treated as such! Keep your plain, pauper toothbrush away from my royal chompers!

Funny story: My husband and I own these sleeping bags and on our most recent camping trip we actually got them mixed up! Boy were our faces red!

As a woman, I want my laxative to be gentle, effective, and exactly the same as the normal laxative only with fewer pills and therefore more expensive.

It’s important to instill body issues in girls at a young age. And, in this case, basically from birth.

Finally, a Jenga game for the ladies! Because only girls would be able to answer girly questions such as “name your favorite website” and “describe one of your secret talents”. Boys don’t talk to each other!

Every time something broke in our house I was forced to call on my husband, my father, or our burly next-door neighbor to come over and fix it. But now that I have a drill made for me I can finally hang that “LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE” sign above the faux fireplace in our living room!

This little cutie must have gotten lost on her way to the girl’s section. Why on earth would she want to play with superhero toys when there are 5,000 Elsa dolls that do nothing in the next aisle?!

Nothing makes me feel more like a woman than when I’m slicing into a deer carcass with my pink camo-print hunting knife. That Shania Twain song plays in my head every time I use it.

Before we discovered this life-saving product, my husband used to throw a fit about how “girly” our dryer sheets would make his clothes smell. Now he can enjoy static-free shirts while his fragile masculinity remains intact.

Where else could I learn how to expertly apply lipstick while driving?

Maybe the reason there are so few female drummers is that they haven’t found a drum set that’s been made specifically for girls!

Will they teach me how to shoot an intruder without breaking a nail? Because I am so SICK of that! Manicures aren’t cheap, ya know!

The other day I was following my husband around the hardware store and was delighted to discover an entire section filled with products designed for women! The thought of finally being able to open boxes, cut things, and unscrew bolts was enough to bring a tear to my eye.

All males must be at least this manly in order to knit. Anyone lower than “cowboy” status is forbidden from even touching those knitting needles.

We need to teach our girls that it’s what’s on the inside that counts. And if your insides aren’t pretty, pink, and covered in unicorns than there is something seriously wrong with you.

We all know that dish soap is a lady’s product, so it’s refreshing to see one that’s made with men in mind. Plus, it makes great soapy water! Very cool!

If my man ever dared to use strawberry lip balm I would immediately kick him out of my house and call the police.