There are a lot of celebrities who make Twitter a fun and hilarious place to be. There are also certain personalities who have become famous on Twitter simply because they are talented at making jokes. A Twitter user, who goes by Myrna Tellingheusen, is exactly one of those people. Her account shares hilarious words of wisdom and feisty remarks from the voice of one clever “grandma.”
Or at least that’s who she claims to be. No one knows who Myrna is — she could be the dowdy old woman in her photo, or she could be George Clooney. We’re not sure. But what we do know is that Myrna has built a huge following on Twitter. Her tweets consist of snarky remarks, gossip and unwarranted comments about people in her church prayer group. One thing is for sure: You don’t want to get on Myrna’s bad side.sa
Get ready to laugh.
Myrna Tellingheusen’s snarkiness will make you giggle with delight. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride through her Twitter feed.
Educating others
Oh, Myrna! This tweet would be funny if it was anyone, but the fact that it comes from her makes it better.
Single-ply
Oh man, this is true.
Aren’t we at the point in time where we are about to stop listening to men altogether?
The Outburst
I don’t fault Myrna for her outburst in JoAnn’s. That’s a frustrating store to be in.
Mildred’s poodle
I don’t know who Mildred is, but Myrna drags her constantly. Poor Mildred. She probably has no idea that Myrna’s bad-mouthing her in front of the whole Internet.
Prayer Breakfast
Wow, Myrna is ruthless!
People should know better than that! Shame on them.
Grudges
If you follow this account, you will soon learn that Myrna is the world’s number one grudge holder. She’s a force to be reckoned with.
Favorite pastime
This is my favorite pastime! If another family puts an apostrophe before the “s” in their name on their holiday card, I’m going to blow a gasket.
Turn the Buick around!
Um, yes, please?
I would take Myrna over our current leadership any day of the week.
Temper
I love this. Myrna doesn’t lose her temper, she knows exactly where it is.
Blockbuster video
I hope that Myrna schooled Fran to the fact that Blockbuster shuttered its doors like, several years ago. What a silly goose, that Fran!
Hard-boiled eggs
Hm! I’ve never tried this before, but I believe that this is true. You have to be aggressive with that shell.
Bed, Bath, & Beyond
Those BB&B coupons are no joke. And they will take them after they’re expired! Don’t throw those bad boys away!
Family update
Good question, Myrna! I don’t understand the purpose of family newsletters like this. Especially when families send them often.
New prescription
Yes, girl! You need your sight in order to judge people. That’s the whole point of wearing glasses.
Applesauce
Well, OK then! You do you, Myrna.
I do like applesauce when it’s paired with latkes.
Miracle Whip
If you haven’t guessed by now, Myrna has a lot of strong opinions about food items, and she is not afraid to express them.
Pyrex
Seriously, though. You should invest in Pyrex. That’s Myrna’s advice, at least.
Covered appliances
What is with old people covering their appliances when you aren’t using them? It’s strange, right?
White teeth
Anyone who has teeth that are too white cannot be trusted. Myrna’s lived a long life. She knows what’s up.
Over my dead body
Myrna does it again!
How dare you use the cake mix? It better be made from scratch.
Zesty turkey wrap
Why doesn’t Fran ever listen to Myrna? Clearly, she knows better than to do things like order the zesty turkey wrap at Applebee’s.
Strained friendship
This would strain any friendship. Who does Eleanor think she is?
Exterminator
I love nothing more than someone who says, “I’m not one to gossip” and then launches full-on into juicy gossip. It’s the best thing ever.
Pre-shredded cheese
Now, this is a slogan I can get behind. Sure, we all use our fair share of shredded cheese. It’s convenient. But it’s got nothing on the freshly grated stuff!
Margarine in the buttercream
Florence needs to watch her tongue and to stop spreading baseless rumors if she knows what’s good for her.
Leopard print pumpkins
In the world of old ladies, the holiday sweater or vest or sweater-vest competition is fierce. Barb’s conquest will not be received lightly by the rest of the gals.
Mr. Nixon
Mr. Nixon deserves to be given this honor. It’s embarrassing that it hasn’t happened yet.
Imitation vanilla extract
Hear, hear! It’s the real stuff or nothing.
Mildred’s cat, Mildred
There goes crazy Mildred.
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