Have you ever dreamed of stepping off a flight and seeing a nice weirdly adorable foreign man in a suit holding a sign with your name on it? Well, I have. For some reason, that kind of thing has always screamed, "I'm rich AF."
It's something about having a man whose whole job is to stand there and wait for you with a personalized sign to greet you. The sign is classy. Personalized. Top notch.
Well, these are not those signs.
These are the signs you return to after taking a month off to "find yourself" while you leave your aggressive hamster, Pickles, with your sister during mating season. The signs you'd see when you return from your first semester in college, obviously hungover. The signs you'd see after jetting off to Hawaii without warning and finding your new "soulmate," Steve.
They're not the nicest signs in the world, but boy are they funny.
In fact they're the kinds of signs that you get when your family is more clever than they are kind. If you've ever been picked up by a family member who wanted to leave a little splash, you may have seen a sign a little bit like these ones. But it's unlikely yours was as funny as the ones we've got here. These are the funny airport signs that you've always wanted to see.
And we've got a bunch of them for you to love. So put on a sleep mask and turn your phone to Airplane mode while we break down our favorites.
Starting off with what I hope is an obvious joke.
British humor at its finest. Just so bone dry. Look at this guy's face! This is the perfect embarrassing airport sign for welcoming home your parent.
Oh no, kids. Please don't.
"You did your best." So... did she not make it all the way through? I have so many questions. Weirdly it does seem as if the kids thought this sign was genuine rather than a horrifyingly funny airport sign.
This is sexual.
#BestAirportSignEver https://t.co/jSLbr4k6qq— GothicChessInventor (@GothicChessInventor)1544616883.0
Please refrain from any debriefings until after you leave the airport. Thank you! But we do have to admit that this is a pretty funny airport welcome sign.
Did she fly first class?
I hope mom showed up in an orange jumpsuit to really scare everyone else in the airport. I feel like I need to remind people that funny airport signs are meant to welcome someone home, not air all their dirty laundry.
5th time's a charm!
We really hope it works out for him and his new wife. I hear they're still together and very happy. These are some kids with a truly vicious sense of humor but I have to admit...it's a funny airport pickup sign.
Hey, your sign's upside down.
As an idiot, nothing would make me happier than seeing this idiot picking me up from the airport. This is the funny airport welcome sign I want to see in the world. Does that mean I'm supposed to make it?
That name though.
Part of me thinks this is fake, but another, more fun part of me thinks maybe I should change my last name to Gleeballs and see what happens. The fact that the rest of the sign is completely serious and normal truly makes this the perfect funny airport sign.
Are we in Ireland?
If this man doesn't show up wearing a hide jacket and a sheathed sword, I don't even know what clan McGregor is doing anymore. Other than making funny airport signs obviously.
Nothing quite like that first poop back home.
After using public restrooms for your entire vacation, there's nothing quite like a solid Imodium and chill. Now you might think that this is an embarrassing airport sign, but in reality this is a sign that tells me Sarah is smart and knows her business.
This person was reportedly seen outside of LAX.
She told reporters that she had been in traffic for six days trying to make her way to the airport. It may not be a funny airport sign but it sure as heck is an honest airport sign.
If I were the parents, I'd walk right past.
Also, does that woman in the background count as a fourth orphan? Because she seems real happy to be there. The rest of them...not so much.
Mom of the year.
Because what's the point of having children if you can't embarrass them every now and then? And what better way to do that than with an embarrassing airport sign? It's all so obvious.
This dumb kid couldn't even spell 'welcome' correctly.
"My daughter made a sign for grandma and grandpa's arrival. (we think)" https://t.co/fYPfq3qhse— awkwardfamilyphotos (@awkwardfamilyphotos)1507330666.0
Just kidding, this is freaking adorable. I hope they somehow managed to hang this sign on the fridge because it's art. I especially like that the w in "welcome" looks more like a v so that I read it in a Dracula accent. "Velcome home bwahahahah". Yeah, this is the airport welcome sign I want.
They fattened up that baby.
Or at least I hope she's talking about the baby and not herself. That would be pretty mean. But at least she made a sign to welcome him home.
Just a baby casually driving to the airport to pick up their parent.
Does that baby have a license? Did she drive a Barbie Jeep or like a real car? So many questions. Also important: did the dad not know this was his baby without the sign? That seems like a lot of work for an airport welcome sign.
Please tell me they're not dating.
I need them to be father and daughter, for my own sanity. Maybe she's older than she looks. Maybe he's younger than he looks! Who knows! Either way, this is one one airport welcome sign that maybe should have stayed at home.
Looking for a pilot.
Because obviously, the two hottest guys at the airport are sexy pilots. They always are. Have you ever seen an ugly pilot? I haven't. And if I did I wouldn't put them on an airport welcome sign.
I have a sneaky feeling Mom is the one who wrote this.
Either that or sign this baby up for college because (s)he's ready. I don't think most colleges ask for a funny airport welcome sign as part of admissions, but standards might be different for babies.
Don't do this.
Don't propose at an airport. There's no reason to. You're not in a romantic comedy (I don't think). Airport welcome signs (especially ones written on cardboard in Sharpie) just aren't up to the task of expressing your undying love.
Still kind of cute though.
I don't want to meet this guy.
For several reasons, but most of all because it looks like he could kill me. He might be smiling, but that airport welcome sign tells a different story.
My kind of sign.
Who is this scary man?
He looks like he's ready to snipe someone in a moving vehicle after downing an espresso shot like a maniac. The text on this embarrassing airport sign is not helping things either.
I'm a fan of this one.
Once again, dad's prove that they cannot be stopped. Just crank the embarrassment up to 11 while you're at it. Sometimes it's not just the embarrassing airport sign, it's the whole embarrassing airport ensemble.
Is this enough evidence for a jury to convict? Because it sure seems like it is. Some confrontations are meant to be public. Others are absolutely not appropriate for airport signs. This is one of the latter.
I am disgusted.
Let's hope this is some kind of weird Series of Unfortunate Events type situation where the kids were left to fend for themselves, because if not, Dad's got some 'splainin to do. And a funny airport sign isn't going to cut it.
I'm accepting applications for a new grandpa.
And this man just shot up to the top of the list. Every day is National Margarita Day. If I had to pick a single funny airport sign to greet me for the rest of my life, it would be this one.
Stay away from this guy.
My real hope is that "Brian" actually is a murderer and everyone thinks it's a joke...perhaps the best part of this airport welcome sign is the fine print: "who says you can't get away with murder?"
Picking up royalty.
Who is this Princess? I must go to her. I am needed by royalty. And the only way to find this royalty is with a funny airport pickup sign.
You're too old for this.
Credit to the guy for showing up to the airport in a onesie though... I wouldn't be brave enough. On the other hand, wouldn't it have been easier to buy cereal than to make this embarrassing airport sign?
Enjoy these? Stay tuned for the most hilarious notes left by passive-aggressive neighbors...