Hilarious Times the Customer Got It Really, Really Wrong

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You have heard the saying before that “the customer is always right.” But if you have worked in retail or food service or literally any other industry where there is a customer, you know 100 percent that that is not the case. The customer is not always right. In fact, I would bet that the customer is wrong more than the customer is right.

I don’t know where the phrase started, but I bet an angry, irrational customer came up with it. Well, the Twitter thread that you are about to read is going to prove that “the customer is always right” is actually pure nonsense. Twitter user @WelshDalaiLama recently asked people to share stories where customers they’ve encountered have been spectacularly and epically wrong. And let me tell you, these stories do not disappoint. These are instances where the customer either ended up or should have ended up embarrassed to an insane degree.

They do say the customer is always right.

But as we are about to learn, if we don’t know already, “they” is dumb. “They” do not live in the real world, where the customer is often hilariously wrong.

Come hell or hot water.

Guy slammed a hot water bottle down on the counter and loudly exclaimed, with wife nodding in agreement behind him, that he’d put cold water in it three hours ago and it still wasn’t hot.byjimini Hey, when a man pays for hot water, he expects hot water. Although, can you imagine getting that old and not understanding how water works, just, like, generally?

Instant Grills

She… She thought there was food inside! They were purchased in the unrefrigerated grill section of the store. What?!

“And don’t fill it to the brim either.”

Had a woman come in and request a large drink in a small cup. I asked her to repeat that. She reiterated she wanted a large drink, but in a small cup. I told her that wasn’t possible. This went on and on, her yelling that it wasn’t that difficult to understand, I’m trying to tell her that they’re different volumes. Eventually, I filled up a large, got a small cup and dead-eyed her while pouring the large in until it overflowed and went all over the counter.PB_PB Honestly, this is less annoying to me than people who ask for their sodas with no ice so they can get a couple extra sips.

Chicken

Someone in the mentions pointed out that she’s not “technically” wrong. She didn’t order chicken. No one ordered chicken. But she also didn’t order anything, and she could have looked around and seen everyone else being served the same thing.

The blame, she has been misplaced.

Card machine was a bit slower than usual. Man: “This is terrible!” Me: “Yeah.” Man: “You should fix this machine!” Me: “Yeah, we should.” Man: “Or replace it! This is a disgrace!” Me: “Yeah, that’s an option too.” Man: “… You should be ASHAMED!” Me: “Yeah I am kind of embarrassed.” Man: “Other stores don’t have this issue.” Me: “That’s because they’re better than us.” *Card payment goes through. Man: “This was terrible!” Me: “Yeah. Awful. Sorry for your trouble, sir.” Man walks off grumbling to himself.Mrsjtkirk What makes me legitimately sad about this one is that this customer thought the employee cared at all. Like, even a little bit.

Too much cream

This is amazing. What balls to slather your scone in cream, decide it’s too much, and then complain about it! Incredible.

Parenting is tough.

I was an intern at an aquarium, and while working at the touch-tank, a kid swallowed a handful of sand. I told his mother, and she told me that he was only four. He proceeded to swallow another handful of sand.dangernoodles628 This poor mom probably didn’t have time to feed her son, and it’s not like this aquarium is running out of sand. This guy is being selfish, imo.

No tomatoes

Hey guy! Not every red vegetable on top of nachos is a tomato. If you’re against red vegetables, say that. We’re just getting started folks. These stories get crazier and crazier.

Stocking around, the Christmas tree.

I was working as a waitress, and a woman stopped me as I was passing her table. She told me she got a rip in her stockings from one of our chairs. This was according to her 100% my fault, because I did not warn her about our chairs (??) She asked me if I had any clear nail polish on me or anywhere in the restaurant. I told her that I was sorry but I did not. This was to her so very strange. How could we not have nail polish in the restaurant? She got very angry, wanted to talk to someone else who could fix her stockings. I got my manager who also said sorry but there is nothing we can do about you stockings. He got told the same as me and how can we not warn people about the chairs?! This went on for about 10 minutes because she just could not believe that I didn’t have freaking nail polish in my back pocket! She accepted her stockings fate at last, but I got angry looks from her all night.casool The world of alchemy is a mystery to all those who do not study it, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t all be carrying around clear nail polish in case an alchemist ever needs us to provide one of the many mystical ingredients for their magick concoctions.

“Inedible”

Well, this meal couldn’t have been inedible seeing as the person ate literally the whole thing. Except the peas.

Only boys can go to infinity and/or beyond.

A girl asked me to get her a Buzz Lightyear toy from a shelf. Done. Five minutes later, her parents are complaining that I gave her a boy toy. Personal feelings and rage aside, I tried to deescalate with, “Yes, I suppose Buzz is a boy AND a toy!” Never got written up so fast in my life.Mamlucky Imagine still thinking there were “boy” and “girl” toys in the yer of our lord 2020. Yikes.

Cappuccino

People do not understand the difference between the various coffee drinks, which like, fine, but then let the barista educate you about what you actually want!

“Where did I buy it? Oh, you know…” *generally waves hand around*

While working at Lowes a guy tried returning an item with no receipt. Turns out that item is only sold by Home Depot soooo I told the customer we couldn’t give him a store credit. He lost his shit saying he’s 100% sure he bought it at a hardware store. Yup. Not this one. He wouldn’t take no for an answer, so I brought up the item on the computer and showed him it was sold by Home Depot. Then showed him our website where the item didn’t exist. He got pissed and, mid-Saturday, afternoon yells “ARE YOU STUPID?” I wanted to punch him right in his mouth.Florin919 This poor customer is praying there’s one day a Home Depot/ Lowe’s merger so his life can finally start to make sense.

Wrong change

Hey, I like this one! It’s not every day a customer comes back the next day to admit their mistake. That’s really nice.

Can Guy knows how to work it.

I worked in a gas station where we had a notorious customer we referred to as “can guy.” Every month our station put coupons in the paper for 1.00 of free gas. One coupon per customer per visit. Can guy would collect these coupons and then come park his car on the adjacent street and then go post up on one of our pumps and get gas. One dollar at a time. He’d pump a dollar, come in and give us the coupon and go walk out to the sidewalk (off the property) and then turn around and do it again….for hours. As a pump attendant we have to approve every pump by pushing a button. So every 3 minutes for hours at a time we’d be stuck standing at the till, doing the same transaction over and over. The longest I clocked him doing this for was two and a half hours. Corporate added an addendum to the coupons because of him pulling that shit. Also, he was called can guy because he did all this with a one gallon red gas can.AnneFrank_nstein At least this guy is being overly pedantic in a way that’s saving him some money. People who are overly pedantic on the internet just do it because they’re angry.

Patience with patients

The hospital is a place where the “customer,” or the patient, is definitely not always right. Sorry, that does not apply here!

It’s his smoke break and he’ll burn if he wants to.

Worked at a gas station in the early 2000s. This guy pulls up and tried to pump gas while holding a cigarette in his hand.Ruffle2Shuffle Maybe he’s on a smoke break and didn’t have enough time to both have a smoke and get gas? Did anyone even think about that?

Bad potato!

This is hilarious. It’s an airplane baked potato. What do you want, a five-star meal? The microwave story is my favorite. Just wait…

What goes around comes back around.

A friend worked at a really busy McDonald’s, and one time a customer kinda threw the money at her disdainfully because they had taken too long to serve her. My friend let her anger get the best of her and threw the change back at her. The customer asked to speak to the manager to complain, and after she told him what had happened, he said that she shouldn’t have thrown the money at his employee if he didn’t want the change thrown back at her. The woman was outraged and threatened with vague consequences, but the manager was like, “what are you gonna do, boycott McDonald? I think the company will survive that hard blow.”rosapalmera I don’t know how much money McDonald’s makes in a year, but I’m pretty sure a few 100,000 customers either way won’t make them bat an eye.

Wireless computer

Clearly it’s not wireless. Or even if it is, it probably has to get plugged in to charge in order to make it wireless.

K.O!!

I worked with a guy who punched a customer once. He was standing at the register and a customer came into return a set of tools and literally threw the set down on the counter, causing screw drivers and tools to fly across the counter that then hit the employee.greeneyeded You’ve got to be careful with those tools, pal. One errant screwdriver could take a man out.

Coleslaw

This customer was clearly thinking of a completely different restaurant. Either that or they were straight-up lying about how long they’ve been coming to that place.

Love a good rental store where you don’t have to return your movies because now you own them.

I used to work at a video rental place (living the dream as a 19 year old) and a customer comes in and asks if we sell movies. I said “yes,” so she starts walking along the wall of clearly marked RENTAL movies, pointing at titles they want. I start telling them the ones we have in stock for purchase and the ones I will need to order in. They eventually come up to the front and begins to pay, I tell them the total (a lot more than the listed RENTAL price) and they get really confused as it’s a lot more than they were expecting. I’m in the middle of explaining that they are new releases when it hits me: they don’t know this is a rental place. I explain this kindly and carefully and that I have had to order them in. At this point they drop all pretense of niceness and in front of customers and my shift manager give me a look of pure disdain. “You are an idiot” they say. “Yeah, well at least I didn’t walk into a video rental place and try to buy the DVDs”. They roll their eyes and huff out of there.SputNick2312 Now no one knows what rental stores were. This lady was just ahead of her time.

Zucchini

OK fine, dude! If you want to pay $8 for a zucchini, be my guest! The customer is right. This is an expensive zucchini.

It was supposed to make your eyes burn.

Karen – I’d like to get my money back for this lotion it made my eyes burn. Alert – I’m sorry ma’am we don’t issue refunds for open products, however you may exchange it for another. Karen – no I’d like my money back Alert – I’m sorry, but I can’t do that, this policy is stated on the back of the receipt I gave you when you purchased it Karen – I’d like to speak to a manager Alert – I am the manager Karen – This is extortion.the_alert Man, getting extorted because you bought the wrong product and generally ignored the store’s rules? You hate to see it.

Carbon monoxide

You see, yeah, but the thing is that carbon monoxide is odorless. That’s why it’s so dangerous!

Did you move recently?

I work as a customer service agent for Amazon. Their package was being shipped by USPS. There was a scan on the tracking number that said something along the lines of “as per the agreement between the customer and carrier, this package has been redirected to a new address.” Then there’s about 10 minutes of yelling about how this is our fault, she sent it to her own address because that’s where she wanted it delivered, that we did something, that we’re going to fix it, etc. Then the magic words come out of her mouth: “Well I have my mail forwarded to another address, but that shouldn’t happen with packages.”MossySloth To be fair to this woman, my old roommate moved out something like six months ago and I still get his mail, so yes, getting your stuff sent to you is very difficult. At least that’s what Rob keeps saying.

Paddling pool

Did she not expect a kiddie pool full of water, which was blocking the sun from that patch of grass, to kill that patch of grass? The next one is priceless.

The dog-neutering expert has arrived.

I worked at a humane society, which had its fair share of idiot customers. I once got in an argument with a man who asked if one of the dogs was neutered. I said yes and the man replied with, “oh no he ain’t.” I reiterated that yes, he was, and even explained how I was the one who looked after the dog following his surgery. The minor swelling down there made it appear like he was in tact, but he definitely wasn’t. That wasn’t good enough somehow. Giving in I said, “Even if he’s not fixed, he’s required to be prior to adoption.” The man ended the conversation with, “I don’t want a dog that’s fixed because they’re lazy.”password-is-taco_ It’s not a bad point — if the dog isn’t lazy, why didn’t he fight to not be neutered? You don’t want a dog who’s a quitter.

Annoying child

This person is telling me that the woman didn’t know where her own child was for 45 whole minutes. This is incredible.

Wait, why are there McDonald’s in Wal-Marts?

A woman got mad because the McDonald’s I used to work at didn’t take Wal-Mart returns. We even have a sign.LittleHaitian This one isn’t even the customer’s fault — it’s McDonald’s and Wal-Mart’s. Have separate locations, my guys!

Rejected application

Sorry, it’s not the school’s fault you quit your job before you even got into the program. Things like this are probably why you didn’t get in, honestly.

Get in that kitchen, and stay in that kitchen!

While attending college I used to work at Pizza Hut as a “cook.” I got this one order. I made the pizza, waitress came back and said she forgot they wanted tomatoes, so I re-made it with tomatoes, no biggie. Waitress comes back and says they meant uncooked tomatoes, so I had to remake it and then add fresh tomatoes to it, now I’m starting to fall behind on other orders. Waitress comes back and says that they want whole wheat crust not regular. At this point I’m getting really frustrated but I re-make the pizza for the 1000th time thinking “this finally must be it.” Nope, waitress comes back and says they want whole wheat flat. I take the damn pizza and bring it to the table and put it down and say, “eat your damn pizza.” The lady says “you can’t talk to me like that I’m the customer you’re just a cook.” I walk away and say “just eat the pizza.” My manager (one of my best friends) tells me I can’t leave the kitchen anymore.darko2309 Here’s the rule for the next time you order pizza: you get two re-dos. After that, you shrug and eat the pizza, because it is definitely close enough.

Debit card troubles

But… But that is the reason your card isn’t working. Because you have no money left in the account.

They call her SuperKaren.

I used to work at a GameStop at a mall when both were still a thing. Christmas season is always the worst. One night we were closing up and had our gates lowered halfway so the last person checking out could still leave the store. A lady lifts up our gate and comes in and starts browsing. I ask if she needed any help which she declined. I let her know we’re closed and that’s why the gates were down but she brushed that off too, saying she wouldn’t be long. I can’t imagine caring that little about other people.Rihsatra The rush of adrenaline an entitled customer often gets right before a GameStop is closing is said to be similar to what a mother receives when a car is trapped on top of her child — they can absolutely lift any gate behind which is an employee who wants to go home.

Angry rant

This is amazing! She went off on a random person in the store who didn’t even work there. I love that so much.

Cargo shorts make you sneaky.

I used to work at American Eagle. I was ringing out a customer and realized he stuffed every pocket of cargo shorts with boxers. I asked him what he thought he was doing and he just said “it’s a BOGO deal.”Emmm1795 Every sale is a Buy One Get One sale if you steal. Some don’t even bother with the Buy One part!

New microwave

This is so! Good! Did they really not know that there was a protective layer on the silver microwave? Truly, though, just wait for the calzone story.

They’re getting pretty good at disguising non-beef as beef these days.

Had a vegan customer lose her mind for biting into a “beef burger,” according to her. We don’t sell beef burgers. She had our plant based burger that tastes like those beef burger ones. She still couldn’t believe us and ask for her money back.this_is_Patr1ck Mm, a non-beef burger that tastes like a beef burger? I’m drooling… (Both because I’m hungry and I want to start eating better.)

For free

I love this comeback. Why do people think they can ask for free things in stores? I don’t get it. That’s not how it works.

Complainer, complain about thyself.

On Christmas Eve. Customer walks up and says “I think it’s terrible that you have to work today. WHY do you have to work today?!” Me: Because people like you come here. Yeah, she complained to my boss.bentnotbroken96 I hope that boss responded by saying the employee was literally just stating facts and there’s never any reason to complain about the facts.

Record shop woes

Oh my goodness, Harry Potter and the Chamber of Commerce sounds like one of those awful “hip” lessons that high school teachers come up with to teach you economics.

“Be better than me, idiot!”

An old woman came up to me at work asking how much the exact price of an item would be with 65% off. Math has NEVER been my strong suit so I said I wasn’t sure but if she didn’t mind I’d calculate it on my phone for her and she goes “you seriously don’t know it? You can’t do it in your head?” Excuse me? Girl you don’t know it either!digital-shawty She was asking for help, but what she wanted help with was feeling like a smug, superior SOB. And this employee did their job perfectly!

Separate living area

Oh my goodness. He had a suite! And he didn’t open the door to the bedroom for three days. How embarrassed would you be if this was you?

Christmas is a time to get what you want.

Worked for an upmarket UK toy company. Customer is furious we don’t offer same day delivery, at 5pm on Christmas Eve. Ruined her child’s Christmas as “this was gift from Santa.” Threatened to write an article about me personally for “refusing to do anything to help.” Apparently she worked for the Guardian. Honestly, the products we sold were mostly overpriced but it attracted a very entitled and graceless clientele. Mostly I had to stop myself from laughing at how ridiculous some of the requests we had were.Rasberryblush Whenever someone tries to blame you for ruining Christmas, you know they are a delusional psychopath. No one inflicts that kind of psychic terror on another person.

New website

Obviously, this woman has no idea what websites are or how they work or what purpose they serve. So cool that this person gets to teach her all of that!

Ever used a copy machine there, big guy?

Big guy made some copies at our print center. He comes over to me to check out. Naturally, I pick up his color copies so I can count how many he has. Him: “DON’T TOUCH THOSE, THEY’RE PRECIOUS FAMILY HEIRLOOMS!” I’m thinking to myself, “no these are copies of heirlooms.”Disgustipated2 Before we cast shade, consider this — what if his family really did love and value their copies? Maybe their grandfather made copies on a printing press, and passed the business down to his sons — his big, beautiful boys — and they displayed his copies on their mantle?

Warm chicken salad

The word “warm” is literally in the title of the dish that she ordered. People need to learn to read! We’re almost at the story with the physical violence!

Incredible bravado.

Many years ago I worked at Best Buy in the TV department. Plasmas were all the rage. It was common to get really dumb questions all the time, but none would lead to anything confrontational, and you just mostly try not to laugh. Had a guy come in wanting to buy a Plasma TV. He wanted to know where the extra power cable was to plug in and re-charge the plasma. He was totally serious and argued with me about it for at least 10 minutes. I was just to about to lose my mind when my manager overheard some of it and came to intervene. Guy ended up leaving super mad and without a TV.Big_fish46 You have to think this guy made a simple mistake — hey, maybe TVs do work like phones and need to be charged? — but can you imagine doubling-down like this? Just take the L and get your TV set, my man.

Too drunk

Bouncers know when a person is too drunk. They spend their living sizing up drunk people. Believe them.

“Er, whatever you want, ma’am.”

I had a woman ask me to cut her pizza into six slices because she didn’t think she could eat eight…KnifeFightAcademy She’s just being weight-conscious, and portion control is a big part of that (even if it’s nonsense).

One day early

Ah! This one hits home because once when I was studying abroad, I booked a hostel for the wrong night and we had to sleep in the Dublin airport. No one was very happy with me.

“I know what you sell better than you do!”

Customers would come into Barnes and Nobles with books they’d bought from book clubs, these books are shaped differently to designate them as book club books, and would tell us they’d lost their receipt and wanted to return the book to us. We’d tell them that they were holding a book club book, one that we didn’t sell and they would throw tantrums.TheRealHardrada I hope this kind of behavior went even further — that customers came in with, like, a charcoal grill, insisting they bought it at that particular Barnes & Noble.

Hurt arm

Here’s the thing: Don’t smack nurses in the face! That’s really rude and uncalled for, no matter what they do!

You wear a fur coat in summer? You know that’s gonna be trouble.

Woman came in around 9 PM in the middle of summer wearing a fur coat and holding two alternators screaming and yelling. She threw one at my coworker and slammed the other one to the ground when we wouldn’t give her money back on old car parts.JARKOP What if the cashier working at the time said, “Oh, she was angry enough to slam an alternator on the floor? I see now the error of my ways. We will, of course, return both alternators and give her a coupon for a free oil change. Your actions have helped us see the light. Thank you.”

Breaking down a pig

There’s a reason that being a butcher is a whole profession. It is skilled work that you can’t learn by watching a video of someone doing it once.

The entitlement is strong with this one.

Was stocking shelves from a box. Customer came along and dumped contents on the floor because she wanted the box.proudfootz Remember, customers do literally have the right to pick up and take an items they see within a store. After all, they’re customers.

What if they simply weren’t welcome?

Helped someone get their stuff out of a locker because it was stuck. The family proceeded to say thank you to me for helping them and I replied with a no problem, guys. They look back at me and say, “you should say you’re welcome”. Taken aback, I decide to walk away from it. People trip me out.ItsRaaawburt This “you’re welcome” versus “no problem” debate that rich, entitled jerks have decided to be angry about is mind-boggling. They’re still acknowledging you! Don’t police their specific words! That’s a one-way ticket to getting that thank you rescinded.

Calzone

Did they think a calzone pizza would be a regular pizza pie with mini calzones on top? Because dibs on that idea. Share this with someone to make them laugh!