Picture this: a husband, sitting alone at home, contemplating a decision that could have significant consequences for his marriage.
Husband contemplates changing his will
He is grappling with the idea of secretly changing his will.
The post, which was shared on Reddit, went viral in a matter of days, and people had mixed feelings about the man’s decision.
As the weight of his decision weighed down on him, he wondered if he was being a bad husband.
Is it morally wrong to exclude one’s spouse from inheriting their estate?
In his post, he mentioned his wife going into pre-labor and being told that she didn’t want him to be in the delivery room.
Kicked out of delivery room
“I ask her what happened, and she says she just doesn’t want me there right now,” he wrote. “I stand there in surprise for several seconds, after which the midwife tells me to get out or she’ll call security.”
He then opened up on how he’s had numerous suspicions about his wife not really being as supportive or loving as he’d like her to be.
When he comes home from work, “her eyes don’t light up,” and she doesn’t appear to pay him much attention when he’s conversing with her.
He thinks she’s not that into him
“I don’t think she loves me nearly as much as I love her.” The Reddit poster then went on to share how he has sometimes felt as if his wife is with him for the wrong reasons – his money.
“I live in a state where the right to an elective share is 25% of separate property. We don’t have a prenup, so this means that my wife has a right to at least 25% of my separate property if I die even if I were to disinherit her in my will,” he added.
“I’ve decided to will her 30% of my separate property (was previously 100%) and 100% of our communal property if I die.”
Time to revise the will?
“The rest of my separate property, including income-producing assets and heirlooms, goes to my children and other family members.”
These questions wrestle in his mind, leaving him torn between his desires and sense of duty. In any marriage, trust and communication are the foundation for a strong bond.
When a husband begins to consider writing his wife out of his will without her knowledge, it raises serious concerns about the health of their relationship.
But considering his concerns that his wife may not be in love with him, is he in the wrong? Marriage is a partnership built on mutual love, respect, and support.
By excluding his wife from his will, the husband is essentially undermining these fundamental pillars.
His wife has no idea
However, it should be noted that everyone has the right to make decisions about their own assets and inheritance, which people in the comments acknowledged.
If the husband genuinely believes that excluding his wife from his will is in line with his wishes and values, he may argue that he is simply exercising his autonomy.
It could be a matter of protecting certain family heirlooms or ensuring financial stability for their children.
Regardless, while many people backed his decision to change his will, others said he would have to consider the potential consequences of his actions and approach this sensitive topic with openness and honesty.
Other commentators, particularly women, didn’t necessarily agree that his wife choosing to have him outside of the delivery room was anything to be offended by.
Some felt he was overreacting
“You should read up on the stages/phases of labor, specifically transitioning to stage 2 of labor,” one person said.
“This is a common reaction moms have and it’s due to an abundance of hormones and emotions. And maybe consider speaking to your wife about how you’ve been feeling.”
By keeping his intentions a secret, however, the husband risks creating an atmosphere of secrecy and suspicion within their marriage. Secrets have a way of festering and eroding the trust that holds a relationship together.
By sharing his thoughts and concerns, one user said he could provide an opportunity for her to understand his perspective and perhaps even find a compromise that satisfies both parties.
This level of transparency could not only strengthen their bond but also allow them to work through any potential issues together as a team.
In the end, whether writing one’s spouse out of a will is morally wrong or not depends on the specific circumstances and motivations behind such a decision.
Don’t jump to conclusions
While it is understandable that individuals have different priorities when it comes to their assets, it is still important to approach these matters with sensitivity and consideration for one’s partner and the mother of their children.
Ultimately, a marriage should be built on love, trust, and open communication.