Indiana Man Who Accidentally Shot Himself in Penis Turns Out to be Unlicensed Gun Owner | 22 Words

Listen, there are a lot of crazy accidents that happen in the world. If you're an anxious human like me, then it's probably best to not dwell on all of the bizarre things that can happen out of nowhere. You'll end up sitting on your couch for hours with your laptop open, looking up how people have gotten hurt or died doing seemingly stupid things. It's no fun, people.

But then there are some ridiculous accidents that are so bonkers that they feel like they can't be true. Like an Indiana man who accidentally shot himself in the penis.

And he wasn't even a licensed gun owner.

The stupidity is truly astounding. You hear stories like this and you wonder how some people are even functional adults. Maybe if you're going to decide to be a person who wants to own a gun, you should learn how to actually use it. And not shoot yourself in the genitals.

We hear about freak accidents all the time.

Whether it's somebody getting struck by lightning or something falling out of the sky, they're really crazy and intriguing.

Me, reading about freak accidents on the internet:

It's a morbid obsession, but it's one that's hard to pull yourself from.

There are a lot of accidents that are absolutely devastating.

And then there are things that happen that truly make you question humanity.

Like how a man in Indiana put himself in the hospital for accidentally shooting himself in the penis.

I can practically feel the cringing and wincing through the internet. That's rough...

46-year-old Mark Anthony Jones was taking a walk with his gun strapped to his waist.

He was carrying a Hi-Point 9mm handgun, the Huffington Post reports. Apparently, his gun wasn't very secure.

Ready for even more cringing?

Jones told the police that when he went to adjust the unholstered gun, it fired, shooting a bullet that "entered just above his penis and exited his scrotum." Nope. Like...dude! Why?

The press release was posted on the Marion Police Facebook page.

The press release also noted that Jones doesn't have an Indiana Handgun License. Are you kidding me?

This guy has to be pretty embarrassed.

Who wouldn't be? It's mortifying. The stupidity is off the charts.

Jones isn't alone, however.

In fact, plenty of people have hurt themselves in stupid ways. A reddit thread asked the question, "What is the stupidest way you have injured yourself?"

And the answers are truly entertaining.

Let's take a look, shall we? Warning: do not try any of these stupid things at home.

"Hey guys, watch me do this!"

from AskReddit
I mean, it seemed really cool in theory! That has to count for something, right?

That's not a half pipe...

from AskReddit
What happened to good, old-fashioned leisurely bike rides around the block? This makes me wince.

This doesn't seem worth it.

from AskReddit
I sure hope he was up-to-date on his tetanus shot. Yikes, dude.

Safety first?

from AskReddit
Not if you're this person. Oh, the pure irony!

Even Superman has flaws...

from AskReddit
It's hard work being a five-year-old superhero. But you have to save the world, so what are you supposed to do?

Some sneezes are intense.

from AskReddit
This makes me terrified to ever sneeze again. This is like that scene in Hereditary... You know the one I'm talking about. If you don't...well, bless you.

Be careful when you go to bed.

from AskReddit
This gives me a headache just reading about this story. Nobody wants to hit their head at four in the morning. Nobody.

Leave the wine opening to the professionals...

from AskReddit
This is a genuine nightmare. Wine is supposed to help you relax, not cause you to punch yourself.

A truly epic story.

from AskReddit
That's one ambitious three-year-old. Reach for the stars, kid!

When you don't learn your lesson.

from AskReddit
In this person's defense, we all made really stupid mistakes in high school. You live, you learn. Hopefully.

When you just don't know what you want.

from AskReddit
This is a great example of the importance of committing. Half-committing to something just ends in a severe neck injury.

Treehouses can be dangerous.

from AskReddit
This is why I'm totally fine with having never had a treehouse. They're too high up! You could fall at any moment!

Spicy noodles are for the brave.

from AskReddit
You don't want to mess with spicy noodles. They can nearly blind you, apparently.

Smile for the camera!

from AskReddit
At least this person has a story to go along with their black eye. It'll definitely be a memorable school picture, that's for sure.

Never give up the window seat.

from AskReddit
Even if it means sitting with a torn ACL for the entirety of the flight. Now that's dedication.


from AskReddit
A kitchen is a terrifying place and the toaster is the worst kitchen appliance. Be careful out there, folks.

Well, this started out innocently enough.

from AskReddit
See, this is why I'm terrified to sit on anyone's shoulders. Nothing good can come of it.

Back away from the stove!

from AskReddit
I read this story with a feeling of sheer horror. Electric stoves are tricksters. They should not be trusted.

Wow, people really hurt themselves by accident a lot, don't they?

Not to mention in the most ridiculous of ways. We're all walking safety hazards.

But hey, here's the bright side.

The next time you hurt yourself doing something stupid, just remember: you're not alone! Share this with your most accident-prone friend.