Look, I know I am not a doctor. But when something is wrong with me, I want to know what it is as fast as possible. So I do what so many others do, and what we should definitely not do: I google it. Whether I have a sinus headache or a fever or a sharp pain in my hand, WebMD and Google give me the same responses. I either have a cold or I am rapidly dying of a rare disease that only 10 people have ever had.
And like I said before, I am not a doctor, so I don't know which diagnosis to believe! It is easy to work yourself up into a total panic when you are sick and make it out in your head to be something much worse than what it is. We all do it. It has become sort of a time-honored tradition among users of the internet. If you are not googling your symptoms, what are you doing? Making an appointment with a real doctor like some kind of adult or something?
Ryan Reynolds knows what I'm talking about.Being a celebrity does not protect you from the psychological damage caused by WebMD. It makes you think you have a terminal illness like, 90 percent of the time.
$40 a month
Why would I pay to go see a doctor when I already pay $40 a month for wifi and can just google my symptoms?— Mal (@Mal)1476387293.0
EMINEM: his palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy WEB MD: cancer— Bea_ker (@Bea_ker)1504224907.0
📍Me | | | _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ | 📍Going to a doctor |… https://t.co/7axIcJ20Bs— No Name ⚡ (@No Name ⚡)1545999611.0
me: hi webmd: u will die— ً (@ً)1491584336.0
Every search result
WebMD would be more accurate if every search result diagnosed you as a hypochondriac.— the 'dwayne ''the rock'' johnson' rock (@the 'dwayne ''the rock'' johnson' rock)1310510562.0
self diagnosing via the internet: >you have cancer >you're pregnant >read symptoms you don't have, suddenly start having said symptoms— uguubear 🐻 VTuber (@uguubear 🐻 VTuber)1456369971.0
One tiny google
Me: I know exactly what's wrong with me, Doctor. Dr: I told you no Google. You Googled, didn't you? Me: NO! Dr: <blink> Me: One TINY Google.— 〰 Just Linda 〰 (@〰 Just Linda 〰)1421448113.0
*experiences a minor stomach pain* *Googles symptoms* Web MD: You already died. Me: https://t.co/g4Xf2lzCo3— Petra Hitchens (@Petra Hitchens)1480348580.0
Me: ok brain, it's bedtime, goodnight Brain: yep. Brain:... Me:.... Brain: WAIT! Why does your armpit feel weird? GOOGLE LYMPHOMA SYMPTOMS!— May Keith (@May Keith)1473396430.0
Accepting your death
*feels like body's heating up *searches in Google for related symptoms *sees symptoms are under a serious disease https://t.co/NUdoiUsXDC— Theo (@Theo)1474634482.0
After you search your Web MD symptoms https://t.co/W0EbkIlXEv— first lady life (@first lady life)1508557040.0
Me: I have a cough WebMD: cancer Me: but WebMD: it's a boy— Ciara Jibri (@Ciara Jibri)1495126120.0
Here's a pro tip, don't google your symptoms when you're ill, makes you start thinking about what song they're going to play at your funeral— Brandon (@Brandon)1470870188.0
WebMD OprahWebMD really is like the reverse Oprah. It shouts out that you suddenly have terrible things with abandon.
me: don’t google your symptoms bc it will just give you more anxiety also me: well i have the black plague and 14 tropical diseases— bethany (@bethany)1459801041.0
omg my bottom teeth are aching so bad , time to search up my symptoms on Google https://t.co/1kcyH6fy2w— Sara-may x (@Sara-may x)1472950889.0
SneezingPretty soon, you'll sneeze so hard the baby will shoot out of you and then you'll have a whole other life to take care of!
I accidentally typed my symptoms into IMDB instead of WebMD and it told me I have Gary Busey.— Goats? (@Goats?)1412362355.0
#c19th equivalent of “don’t google your symptoms”. We have always had the WebMD effect! #ecrchat #histmed… https://t.co/9NqhLUNe73— Dr Emilie Taylor-Pirie (@Dr Emilie Taylor-Pirie)1477915743.0
WebMD: Come for the hypochondria, stay for the sinus infection that is definitely cancer.— new year, new expired meats (@new year, new expired meats)1473234733.0
Checks WebMd •Turns out I've been dead for 37 years— Danny Rozell (@Danny Rozell)1479974343.0
6 minutes after checking Web MD. https://t.co/vLv3C2Q9qm— Migo. (@Migo.)1489799330.0
I need to stop self diagnosing myself whenever I feel sick via webmd because apparently I have lymphoma— Patrick Cools (@Patrick Cools)1493662876.0
When you google your symptoms and your friends think you're nuts.🙄 https://t.co/dDAeqw5vJ1— A (@A)1475557708.0
Me: I'll just look up my symptoms online, it's probably nothing serious. WebMD: It'S ProbBALY NotHING SeRiOUs https://t.co/gzAHIQnVOu— kourtney (@kourtney)1494874073.0
Don't do it
Me: *feels something abnormal* My brain: Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do it Don’t do… https://t.co/FO6dBuOWwu— Tucker Kuhnert (@Tucker Kuhnert)1542320270.0
Looked up my cold/flu symptoms on Web MD it told me I would be hit by a meteor and/or just a cold Web MD is never a good idea I never learn— Lesli Margherita (@Lesli Margherita)1434052235.0
Me: hey what's this weird lump? WebMD: could be cancer. Me: it's a raisin stuck to my elbow... WebMD: you have two weeks.— Felix Felicis (@Felix Felicis)1449028088.0
Me: I have a headache WebMD: It'll be your last one https://t.co/Z5Z0Axnr3T— Luda (@Luda)1552406641.0