Last I'd heard, Linday Lohan had escaped the media lens to go and live on some remote island that she'd bought. Oh, wait, no, then I heard that she'd decided to make her island life a reality TV show; right...
The star has had her fair share of ups and downs over the years and I don't blame her for shunning the public gaze in 2016 to start her Beach club on one of the Cyclades Islands. Lohan is now a Businesswoman. I mean in a way I guess she always has been, but now that's her thing, you know? What's happened to the world eh? Kim K is training to be a Lawyer and Lohan's made a show about how to manage your business books. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, I just wouldn't have bet on it.
But the controversy that's invaded Lohan's new image this week comes as she celebrates her thirty-third birthday.
This nude photo came as a surprise to some fans who couldn't understand why Lohan would share such an intimate photo. Others are less surprised and think that the image demonstrates how, now comfortably in her thirties, Lindsay has control over her image and is comfortable in her own skin.
Let's get to the bottom of this, shall we?
Lohan's career started with kids' fashion catalogs and a Jell-O commercial alongside Bill Cosby.
via: Getty ImagesYikes. Truth be told, Lohan did a lot of different campaigns as a kid - she starred in over sixty television adverts before she had even turned 10 years old! She modeled for skinny fashion houses like Calvin Klein and Abercrombie and Fitch, and did TV spots for fast food favorites like Wendy's and Pizza Hut. If this ironic clash of roles didn't give the young child a complex, I'd be very, very surprised.
Considered a television veteran at ten years old?It's true. A year into her first big break playing Ali Fowler on Soap Opera, Another World, she was basically a show-business veteran. There was this odd wiseness to young Lohan though. I used to think that it was in a cute kind of way, as though she was one of those kids that think they know everything when they obviously don't. Looking back now, it seems like young Lohan really did has this peculiar maturity, as though she'd already lived a bunch of times over.
She had "that Jodie Foster sort of seriousness and intent focus beneath her teenage persona".Critic, Roger Ebert, acknowledged young Lohan's peculiar wiseness and likened it to that of Jodie Foster, who starred in the original Freaky Friday. I think that many believed that Lohan would escape the trap of the child star curse; Lindsay had her head on her shoulders - she'd be just like Foster... she'd be fine.
They say that kids from divorce grow up fast.
Lindsay's parents are apparently riddled with guiltsaid, "I think...inevitably we are responsible for what Lindsay did, the path that Lindsay took. Our divorce, because of our relationship, affected Lindsay to the point where she drowned her sorrows and numbed her pain. And it breaks my heart to think that".
The Lohan's certainly did not have a happy household.
The whole living-in-hotels thing.
via: Getty ImagesPost-Mean Girls, a nineteen-year-old Lindsay Lohan began living permanently in hotels around Los Angeles. For several years, the star lived full-time in a string of luxury hotels.
If you live in a hotel, you'll never be alone.
via: Getty ImagesYoung Lohan, escaping the chaos of her parent's turbulent relationship, chose to do this. Her choice not to purchase a property in LA was one made from a deep fear of being alone.
Child star curse or cliche?
via: Getty ImagesI know there'll be a fair few of you out there that don't have much sympathy for Lohan. I can understand that putting energy into feeling sorry for a wealthy movie star can feel like a waste of time. "So what? Another child star's gone off the rails, yea yea". But I think there's more to it than that. We watched Lohan when she was young and innocent, we read about her, heck, we felt like we knew her. Understanding what happened next is an exercise in human psychology.
We know more about some celebs than we do our best friends.
via: Getty ImagesDo you know how your best friend spent the summer five years ago? I can tell you exactly what Lindsay Lohan was doing. Do you know what haircut, what fashion, what music your boyfriend had in 2007? Probably not. And good luck trying to get him to remember. Who we do have copious amounts of information circa 2007 of, though? Whose entire life (pretty much) has been chronicled and archived with enough information to fill a couple of bibles? You guessed it: Lindsay Lohan.
The loneliness of fame.
via: Getty ImagesIn January 2007, a twenty-one-year-old Lindsay entered a rehab facility for the first time. She was still shooting feature film, I Know Who Killed Me, and stayed in the facility for thirty days. Addiction is not an illness exclusive to celebrities and is a battle that most of us will face at some point in our lives. But most of us, of course, won't have our struggles with addiction played out in the public eye.
Jail stints, car crashes and stealing that necklace.
via: Getty ImagesThree months out of rehab, Lohan was put in cuffs on a charge of drunkenly driving her Mercedez Benz into a curb. She was sent straight back to rehab for another forty-five days and was fitted with an ankle tag.
"Put your right foot in, your right foot out, right foot in, then you shake it all about, and then you do the hokey pokey..."
via: Getty ImagesCocaine and amphetamines were found on Lohan two weeks after she left her second rehab stint. They were found on the actress while she was driving so she lost her license, too.
Guess where Lohan went next?
via: Getty ImagesGo on, take a guess... that's right. Lohan went back to rehab again. This time the facility was in Utah.
Eighty-four minutes behind bars.
via: Getty ImagesFollowing her coke-fuelled driving incident, Lindsay was served ten days of community service, three years probation, a fine (probably a hefty one), a compulsory order to enter an alcohol education program, and one day in jail. Would this put an end to what, at this point, could be considered a year blip on the otherwise squeaky clean record?
Wouldn't we like to believe that three stints in rehab and a shave with the law would be the end of it...
via: Getty ImagesSadly, it wasn't the end to Lohan's spiraling. Funnily enough, I don't believe that slapping fines, criminalizing, and villainizing public figures is a sure fire way to get them back on the straight and narrow. In the case of Lindsay Lohan, I'd argue that it didn't help at all.
From 2007 till 2010, Lohan's life was a series of rehab trips and court hearings.
via: Getty ImagesI won't list each and everyone because we'll be here all day, but let's just say that in the three years since her first trip to rehab, Lohan went back for treatment a further five times and appeared in court seven times. Most offenses were even driving offenses or were related to failing drug tests, but one infamous case regarded a stolen necklace.
Lohan was charged with the felony of grand theft by the Los Angeles County District Attorney.
via: Getty ImagesOn February 9th 2010, Lindsay Lohan was charged with the theft of a $2,500 one of a kind necklace. Visiting the Kamofie and Company jewelry store in January, Lohan reportedly walked out wearing it around her neck. None of these misdemeanors are nice to write about. This isn't a story of criminality, but one of a tragic public meltdown.
"You're in the home stretch".By December 2011, Los Angeles County Superior Court Judge, Stephanie Sautner, appeared hopeful that Lohan was out of the bad cycle. Lohan had been showing up to her community service (at a morgue...) making it through the twelve days. According to Judge Saunter, "The morgue seem[ed] to be pleased, as pleased as a morgue can be". Who knew that judges had a funny bone, eh?
"Thanks for being fair".
via: Getty ImagesIt seems like Lohan struck up quite a positive relationship with Judge Saunter, who she has thanked for being fair following the end of her felony probation in March 2012. I don't know this Judge Saunter person, but she does seem pretty cool.
"I know it's hard when people are following you all over the place, but that's the life you chose".Saunter's closing statement to Lohan at the end of her probation acknowledged the price of fame. However, as she was a child star, starring in catalog campaigns from the age of three, can anyone really say that Lindsay Lohan chose this life? I guess she chose to stick with it...
via: Getty ImagesSince escaping the arms of the law in 2012, Lohan claimed on the Today Show that partying “was not her thing anymore". Easier said than done...
A victim to the paparazzi.In mid-march 2012, Lohan got into trouble again after she struggled to make a three-point-turn outside a club while trying to escape a sea of paparazzi. She reportedly grazed a club manager and another car. Lindsay left the scene thinking that everything was okay and the police reported that there was no damage. However, the club manager later got in touch with his lawyers... (great).
Ups and downs.
via: Getty ImagesFor the rest of 2012, Lindsay tried to get back on track. She appeared in Glee, hosted SNL, and got a gig starring as Elizabeth Taylor in Lifetime's Liz and Dick. The shooting of Liz and Dick was a well-documented failure for Lohan. She was reportedly difficult on set, frequently failed to show up, and got into a number of minor offenses. She did two more major acting jobs following the dismally reviewed Liz and Dick: an erotic thriller called The Canyons (2013) and her debut West End production, Speed-of-the-plow (2014-2015). Neither reviewed particularly well.
2014 and Oprah's Lindsay.In 2014, Lohan starred in a reality television program on Oprah's network. The docu-series called Lindsay followed the troubled star as she ended yet another stint in rehab. The series offered an interesting insight into the star, but was not well received by the public. Liz Smith, writing for Huffington Post, described the show as "usually painful to watch," adding that "[Lohan], clearly, had no part in the editing". In the final episode, Lohan had to interrupt filming as she sadly suffered a miscarriage. The show received criticism from many American reviewers for it's handling of the situation and of Lohan in general. I don't know what you think of Oprah, but in regards to her treatment of Lindsay Lohan, I wouldn't be giving her any humanitarian awards.
2016 and escaping it all.Since 2016, Lohan has been living in Greece and the surrounding Cyclades islands. Out of the limelight, it appears that Lohan has found a sense of calm. Without the noise and the chaos of paparazzi following her everywhere she goes, Lohan has been able to stick her business head on and begin a series of ventures.
No one can hurt her now.In a revealing interview with the New York Times from June 2018, Lohan opened up about her decision to leave America. Lohan talked about leaving the past in the past, but when asked about her feelings towards the tabloid press, the actress-turned-hotelier-and-club-owner made a profound statement. Lohan, chilling in her beach resort said: "I think success is the best revenge — and silence, as a presence. When I chose to change my future, my life, I was like, ‘Where’s the one place I can find silence?’".
Escaping Trump's America.
via: Getty ImagesPrior to Trump's presidency, he made some rather alarming comments about the ex-child star. In 2004, when Lohan was eighteen, Trump publicly mused on whether the freckles on Ms. Lohan’s chest made her more, or less, sexually attractive. While on Harold Stern's Radio Show, Trump stated: "She’s probably deeply troubled and therefore great in bed. How come the deeply troubled women, you know, deeply, deeply troubled, they’re always the best in bed?" When asked by The New York Times how she felt about Trump's election Lohan simply stated: