Let's start with the obvious: we're all a little bit weird right now. There's a global crisis happening. People are fighting each other over toilet paper. No one's brain is working exactly perfectly at the moment, and on top of that, we're all in close quarters with no way to get out.
That means we're all in the process of having some weird fights.
But here's the honest truth: this fight is weirder and more awful than any fight you can imagine. It starts with some beans and ends with a breakup, which is a truly amazing leap. Curious about how one couple went from a fairly normal stockpile to breaking up and living separately?
Just keep reading and we'll reveal all the details of this wild story. Come with us on a story that starts in an apartment, moves to the woods, and just keeps ongoing. It's going to be a bumpy ride.
The beginning of this story is familiar.A guy and his girlfriend stocked up on some supplies to get them through quarantine. Simple enough. With all that is going on, we had stocked up on supplies, including some canned goods. -ThrowRA_BeanDrama
Maybe they went a little heavy on the beans, but beans are a solid choice.I ordered a few weeks ago 30 cans of beans. 10 are black beans, 10 are kidney beans, and 10 are pink beans. Also, I ordered 15 cans of chickpeas. I thought this is a reasonable amount of beans and chickpeas to have every now and then and would last for quite some time.
Now you'd expect that they would be set on beans for quite some time.But that's where you'd be mistaken. The bean problems started almost immediately.
You see OP wanted to make some chili, as one does when stuck in quarantine.But when he went to the cupboard, what did he see? No beans.
Ok, that's weird. But then it gets weirder.He asked his girlfriend about it, thinking there's no way they went through 30 cans of beans that quickly (a reasonable assumption).
Here is what his girlfriend said:She told me she buried all of the beans in the woods. She did what? Why? PLEASE EXPLAIN.
Then we get into some weird logic.She told me she was afraid that "if things get bad" we might have to worry about "looters or whatever" and that the beans would be in danger of being stolen.
Like a sane human, OP thought this was pretty flipping weird.But it just escalated:
She became angry at me and said she "is protecting our beans."
According to her logic, the beans are safely buried in the woods behind our apartment complex, and if we ever need some beans she will go to the "stash" and dig up a can or two, but would prefer if we save them all for "if things get worse."