Middle-Aged Women Share the Advice They'd Give to Their 20-Year-Old Selves | 22 Words

Getting advice can be tough; no matter how much older or wiser another person is, they can't know exactly what you're going through, and often the advice they have, while well-meaning, isn't always what you need.

But, what would happen if you could give advice to yourself?

Well, we are about to find out that the advice you give yourself really is the best and most universal of all. Writer and college professor, Nyasha Junior recently posted a question on Twitter asking women who are over 40 what pieces of advice they would give to their 20-something selves. Over 1,000 women replied with brutally honest, funny, warm, and interesting pieces of advice. And you know what? It turns out that this personal exercise resulted in some universal ideas we could all benefit from hearing. Take a look at some of the best answers.

Do you know what words of wisdom you'd tell your 20-something self?

Seeing as I am at the tail-end of my twenties, I was quite curious about what these women had to say. And they did not disappoint.

Leave after...

If someone lies to you, that is their true self. They are showing you who they are, and that is a person who doesn't respect you enough to tell you the truth.

Save more

I can relate to all of this. At the end of my twenties, I'm just getting to the point where I'm learning to say the things I am feeling when I am feeling them. It's hard.

Be less afraid

Every item on this list made me scream, "Heck yeah!" after reading it, so I think this is a good tweet.

Take care of yourself

It's not your job to make everyone else happy. And even if you do so, that doesn't mean you'll be happy.

Define success

So many young women's insecurities stem from a lack of trust. We live in a society that doesn't value our opinion as much as that of others for no real reason. It's time for that to change.

Life is not baseball

I love a good sports analogy! Also can't get enough of the quote, "comparison is the thief of joy." Stop comparing yourself to others and do you.

Learn your strengths

Don't fight what you're good at and what you enjoy. You can find a way to build your life around those things.

Question the story

We so often put ourselves into boxes without even realizing it. It's time to do an unboxing of yourself and reflect! Also, I second the idea of saving a little bit from each paycheck.

Let go of mistakes

It does no one good to keep beating yourself up for mistakes you made in your past. Let yourself change and grow. You deserve that.

Other people aren't paying attention

I wish I could shout this one from the rooftops! It took me so long to realize that no one is judging you when you're out in the world trying to be yourself. If they are, that's totally on them.

Not required to smile

Heck, yes. Women are taught to be quiet, to make themselves small, to disappear. This is wrong. Learn it now, and you will be so much happier.

Take up all your space

Another woman wished that she realized she deserved to take up space, to live completely and fully. Young women, take note!

Fear is a liar

I think society instills a fear inside women of our own thoughts and our own instincts. No one else trusts a woman, so why should we trust ourselves. Those days are over.

Your thighs are fine

Practical, helpful, but not at all shallow! You are perfect just the way you are. Stop worrying about yourself, apply some sunscreen, and go live.

Ask forgiveness

I love this idea of asking for forgiveness, not permission (within reason). And I super love the idea that sometimes, you don't even have to worry about the forgiveness part.

Stick to the original plan

It doesn't help anyone to destroy yourself in the process of trying to help others. Make sure you come first.

Make friends with yourself first

Only when you really love and know yourself can you then find someone and have a healthy relationship. So don't rush! You have plenty of time.

There are no special occasions

This is basically one big "treat yo'self!" list. But not in a flippant way. You are the only one you will ever have. Treat yourself right.

The writing is real

If you are a writer (like me), this tweet hits home. But this can apply to any interest or passion you have. If you work, at something, you will become better at it.

You look great

You look great right now! Seriously, you are gorgeous! You are beautiful! Oh, and I learned number three the hard way. Always ask.

Stop apologizing

This seems to be a primarily female problem, and it's time for it to stop. Unless you do something truly heinous, stop apologizing!

Go to therapy

This is another piece of advice I wish I could scream from the rooftops. Actually, I would like to write this short, sweet sentence on a million pieces of confetti and launch them off the rooftops.

Don't waste your time

Sure, consider what other people have to say. But ultimately, you should listen to yourself.

Don't be a people pleaser!

So many people I know consider themselves people pleasers. And almost all of them are women.

More than enough

Don't let anyone tell you differently! This is such a valuable thing to learn.

Breathe

It's good to remind yourself of this periodically. Take a beat. Breathe deeply. Return to yourself. And then keep going.

Have more faith

There it is again! Women are constantly taught that they don't know what's best, even for themselves.

Marriage and shoes

Two incredible pieces of advice. Marriage is work, but it can absolutely be worth it. And for goodness sake, buy yourself quality footwear.

Aging is everything

Amen! Share this with a strong woman you know!