Listen, there is so much content online about what it is like to deal with newborn babies. You can search "toddler" on Twitter and find droves of parents who can't wait to divulge all the trials and tribulations of parenting small children. Everyone knows that teens are basically the worst and parenting them is a nightmare. And yet, there is not much commiseration about what it is like to have a preteen.
Is that because they are easier to deal with? Heck no! Preteens have their own quirks and issues and it is just as hard to parent a kid when they are 11 years old as it is when they are three or 17. I will say that preteens, or "tweens," as some call them, are absolutely hilarious. They are smart enough to have some knowledge of the world but not smart enough to filter their thoughts like...at all. So when they're not complaining about their lives and being violently struck with hormones, they are absolutely hysterical.
Youth sports
Me: Our kids are finally at an age where we can sleep in on week- Youth sports: Let me stop you right there.— Jessie (@Jessie)1530797826.0
Reverse psychology
I like to make sure my preteen never wears an outfit ever again by telling her she looks really cute in it.— 🎃Spooky Roundhouse 👻 (@🎃Spooky Roundhouse 👻)1529864034.0
Notebooks
11yo: Let's go out and buy notebooks. Me: Didn't I just buy you a notebook? 11yo: Yes. Me: So. 11yo: I don't physic… https://t.co/wbc5AunzsT— Amanda Mancino-Williams (@Amanda Mancino-Williams)1529840857.0
Deodorant
I spray deodorant on my 12yo son while he's sleeping. You're welcome.— Abe Yospe (@Abe Yospe)1536547661.0
So many questions
You have to give credit where credit's due. These are things I have literally never thought about in my entire life.Hope is alive
If you think hope is dead then you must not have a pre-teen asking you every day for his own cell phone.— MamaFizzles (@MamaFizzles)1486068652.0
Manual toothbrush
12yo son forgot his electric toothbrush -- so now he has to MOVE HIS ARM to brush his teeth. His protest was legendary.— Steve Olivas (@Steve Olivas)1472990982.0
Cool hip parent
You think you are going to be a cool hip parent, then your 12 year old daughter wants a pair of plain gray sweatpants that cost $58.— Simon Holland (@Simon Holland)1540916310.0
Shopping with a preteen
Trying to convince myself shopping with a preteen is fun but she got stuck in her dressing room and a little voice… https://t.co/pplTaBs9xF— Jessica Watson (@Jessica Watson)1544236055.0
Parental superpowers
The awesome thing about having a preteen is that they make you feel like you have superpowers. Like the superpowe… https://t.co/FA05EEkWMS— Beau Coffron (@Beau Coffron)1542412430.0
Living proof
Preteens are living proof that you can love someone with every fiber of your being while still hoping they'll leave the room.— BadParentingMoments (@BadParentingMoments)1426800188.0
Runaway
'If you're gonna run away, you'll need a sweater and better shoes' is something I just told my preteen as he stomped down the driveway.— JennyPentland (@JennyPentland)1359251305.0
"Did you?"
90% of parenting is asking, "Did you _?" when you know damned well that they didn't.— 👻Mommy Cusses🦇 (@👻Mommy Cusses🦇)1527040928.0
Yayyyyy-uh!
My 12yo and her friend are going through a phase where they just say “huh-whut” and “yayyyyy-yuh” and “okyay!” like… https://t.co/pYCW2sNLsq— Sarah Thyre (@Sarah Thyre)1527907859.0
Not a democracy
"This is not a democracy!!" Every parent. Every morning.— CurrentlyCaprece (@CurrentlyCaprece)1432813690.0
Daily workout
My daily workout is walking through the house 14 times a day turning off all the lights my kids have left on in every room.— Goddess Of Mischief™ (@Goddess Of Mischief™)1434061218.0
"Now?!"
“Now?!” -kids, to almost everything— The Alex Nevil (@The Alex Nevil)1515167061.0
Time for bed
Asking a group of preteens to be quiet bc it’s time for bed isn’t even the stupidest thing I did today.— 🎃Spooky Roundhouse 👻 (@🎃Spooky Roundhouse 👻)1530418687.0
"Old-timey movie"
My 12-year-old just called The Goonies an "old-timey movie" and I'm sad he has to move out now.— Kim Holcomb (@Kim Holcomb)1519709124.0
Stale Wheat Thins
I like to send little notes in my kid’s lunchbox, like “Sorry the Wheat Thins are stale, that’s what happens when you leave the box open.”— Amy Dillon (@Amy Dillon)1539001596.0
Pumpkin pie
This is the time when kids really start asking the tough questions and getting the tough answers that rock their world.Dad's money
Just overheard my 11yo son on the phone with his friend, "Don't worry, I will bring some of my dad's money."— Abe Yospe (@Abe Yospe)1510364316.0
Changing body
When you are going through puberty, it's like the adults in your life can't fathom talking about anything else, and it's literally the worst.Evil genius
When my 11yo daughter is mad at me, she’ll sing an annoying earworm-type song until it’s stuck in my head, then wal… https://t.co/DkhwTdmoI9— Kim Bongiorno (@Kim Bongiorno)1535402033.0
Dumb guys
I mean, she's not wrong. Sometimes preteens have the wisdom of people much older than them.Not telling
Me: Boom! Drops the mic! 12yo: Nobody says that anymore Mom. Me: Oh? What do they say? 12yo: I'm not telling you.— Katy M. Clark (@Katy M. Clark)1453138119.0
KEEP OUT
KEEP OUT: A sign on a door that means, "It's time to buy your pre-teen books about puberty."— Barmy Rootstock (@Barmy Rootstock)1362722614.0
"Bohemian Rhapsody"
My wife and I just lipsynced the entirety of Bohemian Rhapsody and if you need my 12 year old you can find her unde… https://t.co/V1iBXefpSK— Beau Coffron (@Beau Coffron)1535936474.0
Not like that
I told my 12yo to get off his iPad and go outside and he said, "No. I'm not like that."— JennyPentland (@JennyPentland)1507430229.0
Preteen girl suffering
There's suffering and then there's preteen girl can't find her hair straightener on school picture day suffering.— The Dose of Reality (@The Dose of Reality)1472557350.0