Chances are if you've been on least one date, you have also been on a bad date. I am not saying that all dates are bad. I am only saying that most of them are. Me, personally, my worst date was painfully boring, the dude and I had nothing to say to each other, and then at the end, he made me split the bill for two beers (we each had one) and a plate of shared French fries. We side-hugged and never spoke again.
And I got off way lucky! That is a super tame bad date compared to the nightmares on this list. Like, some of these traumatized me for life, and all I did was read about them. It seems like people all over the Internet (and honestly, mostly women) have unbelievable horror stories from dates they've had to endure. It is a wonder that women still agree to go on dates at all. These stories will make you scream and cringe and cry. Guaranteed.
We have this Twitter user to thank for the most horrifying thread in recent history:We've all been on some bad dates, but somehow, each of these stories ups the ante in new and disturbing ways.
The unwanted house guestBut like...what? WHAT? Was that the date? I have so many questions, but I don't want any of them answered.
The unfortunate relation
@proletariatitty A friend had set me up on a blind date (mistake number 1) she was sure we were a perfect match bec… https://t.co/J3mkw9PRip— James M (@James M)1548289685.0
The commitment freak
@proletariatitty Took me to meet all his friends on first date, told them I’m “The One”, didn’t like me noping out… https://t.co/qwUTLe0uXE— S (@S)1547957748.0
The epic poet
@proletariatitty Within 5 minutes of sitting down to dinner, the lady whipped out a handwritten epic poem (at least… https://t.co/XO37LID1Xj— Nick Kolakowski (@Nick Kolakowski)1548030263.0
The car accident
@proletariatitty I had the girl meet me at a party. I parked and opened my car door and a car ran into the door, ta… https://t.co/OKI4cBc9CY— Paul Booth (@Paul Booth)1548279717.0
The closeted manAw man, this sucks. Of course, he was cute and funny. But like, you gotta live your truth and all that.
The ax collectorThere is so much going on in this one tweet, but the ax collecting thing is the perfect button. Just really ties it all together neatly.
The work buddy
@proletariatitty He said we were going for coffee, he was an hour late and he ended up taking me to his work place… https://t.co/5KzuYg5Ons— Jannat (@Jannat)1547949586.0
The Norman Bates fanaticIf this isn't the opening scene to a Psycho sequel, I don't know what is. This is insane.
The funeral date
@proletariatitty Matched with someone on tinder. He invites me to a bar/grill for drinks to meet. I get there, his… https://t.co/G3ih8qTIkp— 𝖏𝖊𝖘𝖘𝖎𝖈𝖆 𝖘𝖙𝖔𝖗𝖒𝖇𝖔𝖗𝖓 🖤 (@𝖏𝖊𝖘𝖘𝖎𝖈𝖆 𝖘𝖙𝖔𝖗𝖒𝖇𝖔𝖗𝖓 🖤)1548115771.0
The catfish catcher
Met his parents. They led me out back to a broken jacuzzi filled with turbid water...then handed me a net & instruc… https://t.co/AkE0jkieCj— Megan Nicole Dong (@Megan Nicole Dong)1548317112.0
The D&B wake
OKAY BRACE YOURSELVES. It was a wake/memorial. For the guy's ex. At a Dave and Busters. I had no idea ahead of ti… https://t.co/2GXYv60mbw— Cara McGee 💖 (@Cara McGee 💖)1548289173.0
The selfish dud
@proletariatitty Him talking 2 hours about himself and after I asked him if he isn’t interested in what I do said:… https://t.co/pDnm2KMhZ7— muzlamic barbie ☭ (@muzlamic barbie ☭)1547954842.0
The secret girlfriend
@proletariatitty We’d been dating a few weeks and had a nice lunch and went shopping. I tried on clothes for him… https://t.co/o6JAGzP1BB— Angie (@Angie)1548041159.0
The horse roommate
@proletariatitty Blind date invites me over to paint. We paint portraits of each other while he tells me if he won… https://t.co/gyA5DYWtkK— space stepmom (@space stepmom)1548177557.0
The date retraction
@proletariatitty He asked me to go on a date and during the date he said, I don’t want you to think it’s a date. We’re just “hanging out” 😳— Maryam (@Maryam)1547992993.0
He lost his wallet at the bar. Made us go back so he could look for it. Couldn’t find it. Accused me of stealing i… https://t.co/MIPmOL26B9— [kie.ran] (@[kie.ran])1548351494.0
The gross ogler
At a bar, Tinder date. He would ask me a question about myself, and as I started answering, he stopped paying atten… https://t.co/VcAfwL9P0B— Barbara Dunkelman (@Barbara Dunkelman)1548276929.0
The secret *pregnant* girlfriend
@proletariatitty his pregnant girlfriend showed up and tried to fight me— lets get kersey (@lets get kersey)1547990266.0
The stalkerUm, no. Just no. What do you even do? Call the cops? Like, that's the only option, right? So incredibly creepy.
The serial killer
he said he liked hiking and then talked for like 5 minutes about how girls don’t want to hike on a first date becau… https://t.co/njeVuuZUbX— ch🧠rlie (@ch🧠rlie)1548280164.0
The skateboard model
@proletariatitty It wasn’t really a date but a guy invited me over for the first time. I went, we hooked up. Very b… https://t.co/c3FPC1X8xd— Sam (@Sam)1548129682.0
The illustrator virgin
@proletariatitty Another one: I told the guy I was an illustrator. He asked me what an illustration was and was ab… https://t.co/7QryVbGLyF— lucía/dreriart (@lucía/dreriart)1548339172.0
The nose booper
@proletariatitty dude called me pet names on the first date. when i told him i had a chronic illness he called me a… https://t.co/vMORDQxS8s— dancing little cat puppet (@dancing little cat puppet)1548027161.0
Three dates in: "I'm not attracted to you." Text afterwards: "But I still want to be collaborators. We should do a… https://t.co/e78lF2Tdxs— Louis Virtel (@Louis Virtel)1548269044.0
The straight-up racist
On a date with this one guy, and he thought he’d tell me how he liked to go to Chinese restaurants and order Shirle… https://t.co/pS1Hf7M5el— Trung Lê Capecchi-Nguyễn (@Trung Lê Capecchi-Nguyễn)1548308250.0
The insensitive reader
@proletariatitty He asked me about my father and I told him my dad died in a plane crash. He takes his phones out,… https://t.co/cIf7RUkNP1— elise valderrama roedenbeck (@elise valderrama roedenbeck)1548278657.0
The gross neggerNegging is nasty and gross and this guy was so bad at it that he was just insanely insulting. Dudes like this do not deserve your attention.
The happy ending
First date, he was *covered* in cat hair (I’m deathly allergic), he called attention to a giant wad of toilet paper… https://t.co/DZ8m6JXiSQ— Slade (@Slade)1548266997.0