Christmas isn’t all about presents and lights and carols and candy canes. That stuff doesn’t appear under the tree overnight, no matter how many years you spend trying to convince your children that that’s the case. To be honest, some of the stuff you have to do to make Christmas the magical holiday it is is actually kind of a pain in the butt.
It is a lot of work to make the magic happen. And often, things don’t turn out exactly how you imagine them to. Sometimes you are “dreaming of a white Christmas,” but in reality, you are, “counting down the days until your children stop terrorizing you and go back to school. Oh god, please don’t let it snow because you cannot handle a snow day right now. Please, they are hopped up on hot chocolate and giddy with gifts. The school needs to take them back now.”
Christmas is stressful for some.
This puppy clearly needs a break from it all.
And so do these people.
Neighbors’ lights
This is a real thing, though! I happen to really like Christmas decorations on houses, but I do feel for the people who live next to the houses that go all out.
Overdecorating
Listen to me! You do not have to put a Christmas sleeve on your toilet.
In fact, please don’t. It’s creepy.
Elf on a Shelf
I grew up Jewish, so I didn’t know about Elf on a Shelf until I was an adult.
Even when someone explained it to me, I did not get it. And I still don’t.
Decorating help
Cats are useless when it comes to Christmas decorating.
Honestly, they’re useless when it comes to pretty much everything else too.
Christmas not Xmas
I guess I don’t really understand this pet peeve, but I also don’t know why we shortened Christmas to Xmas.
When I see it, I say ex-mas, which I don’t think was the intended effect.
Gift wrapping
One time, I knew a person who wrapped a gift so perfectly that the images on the paper lined up perfectly when she taped them.
She was clearly a witch.
Impatient people
It’s true! You went shopping a week before Christmas and expect to be the only one buying emergency gifts for their loved ones?
Come now.
Ho Ho Ho
Not really sure what this person is getting at, but I have a feeling he’s a little prude prude prude.
Being single
Christmastime can be tough for people who are single, but I was this person for a long time.
Embrace being able to do whatever you want during the holidays!
Parsnips
Parsnips are fine if you are very clear that you are serving parsnips! Otherwise, they are a sore disappointment.
Grinches
Oh man, when I was a kid my parents sat me down and in the most serious tones I’ve ever heard them use, told me not to ruin Santa for any of the Christian kids.
Working on Christmas
Hey! There are people all over the place (like me) who don’t celebrate Christmas, at least not in the traditional way.
We need places to go!
Mariah Carey
What?! This is so not fair.
I thought Mariah Carey wanted me for Christmas.
So busy
It sucks, but you can’t really help the busy season in stores.
You can help being a giant, inconsiderate idiot in the aisles, though!
Festive co-workers
Oh man, this is the worst. Why aren’t you putting your head down and just trying to get through these last couple days of work like the rest of us?
Organized braggers
I honestly think it’s more impressive if you do all your Christmas shopping in the panicked four days before the holiday and nail it.
Tinsel
This is a real-life problem for all pet owners.
As long as you don’t have to pull a candy cane out of your pet’s butt, that’s fine.
Surprise visit
This is why you do a white elephant gift exchange with your family and you always buy an extra gift!
Come on, people!
Holiday eating
This is real.
January 1st is when you pull it back together, right?
Holiday Twitter names
Pretty much from Halloween through the new year, I have no idea what anyone’s real names on Twitter are.
Office Christmas cards
Who does this?! This is appalling.
We are adults, not kindergarteners on Valentine’s Day.
Christmas thieves
This is terrible! This is a legitimate pet peeve.
People stealing stuff is bad at any time of year– but during the holidays? Come on!
Being broke
Heck yes, I very much relate to this one.
Especially since all my family’s birthdays happen between November and January.
Odd hours
I’ve never thought about this, but it’s so true! Wake up early, but no lunch?! And early dinner at 4?!
What do you expect me to do for all those hours?
The only thing worse than having to wrap gifts is not having enough paper to wrap gifts with.
This is where those paper bags from the grocery store come in.
Removing decorations
Ugh, just thinking about this is making me annoyed.
Can’t we leave them up all year round?
Santa’s lap
This was uncomfortable when you were a baby, and it’s still uncomfortable now.
Who started this tradition?
Sharing your birthday
I do feel for the people who were born on Christmas. That’s no fun.
Share this with someone who understands that Christmas isn’t all magic!
