People Who Didn't Realize They Were Talking to the Expert | 22 Words

The Internet is a democratizing force. Like, trash trolls and award-winning scientists and dumb people and brilliant authors can all have Twitter accounts. I don't really know what that says about the state of our society, but this democratization of the Internet has certain specific effects. On the one hand, it's really amazing. If you have a science question, you can easily find a scientist in that particular field and ask it.

On the other hand, though, if you want to be dumb enough to tell off someone who turns out to be an expert in their field, whether it's science or politics or business or urban planning or whatever, you're going to get owned, someone will screenshot it, and it will end up all over the place, like in this gallery, for example. So, don't be like the people in this gallery. Do your homework before you look extremely silly in front of millions of people on the Internet.

The thing about the Internet is that experts on almost every subject lurk in the corners.

You can never be too sure who you're talking to, so it's best just to be ultra respectful and understanding about where people are coming from.

For example, if you work at a radio station and you don't know who Annie Lennox is, maybe don't email her.

via: Facebook

She's, um, a superstar, and this guy wants to "give her a chance." This is insanity!

What Professor?

via: Twitter

This is so cringeworthy! This person is basically like, "How could you, a woman, possibly be a professor with her own lab?" In 2018.

Please tell me this is a joke.

via: Reddit

It would be very, very funny to demand of Stephen King an answer to whether or not he's read "The Stand." It's not like the guy wrote it or anything...

Are girls even capable of reading comics?

via: Reddit

We got a whole lot of projection going on here. I bet ol' Sam Elliot's Mustache secretly thinks reading comics is beneath him.

PSST. That's, uh, the lady Julia Roberts' character was based on.

via: Reddit

I bet this story is going to make it into Elizabeth Gilbert's next book, "Eat Pray Make A Fool Of Yourself."

One cool thing about Chipper Jones: he's a first-ballot MLB Hall of Famer.

via: Reddit

Another cool thing about Chipper Jones: he cold rob the Atlanta Braves blind if he wanted to, what with all this unfettered access. The security guard would never know.

"Do your research" is code for "I've decided I'm right and am done listening to you prove me wrong."

via: Reddit

One key phrase that will tell you you've won an argument is when your opponent says "do your research." If they had an argument, they'd just make it themselves.

He's America's dad.

via: Reddit

Does this count as a celebrity sighting? If this dude texted all his friends about this, would they think it's cool, or would they be like, "So? I've got a dentist with kids too, dude."

Oh what a tangled web.

via: Reddit

This is very funny because it's neither Stars nor Metric, but is in fact Broken Social Scene. Thank you, Amy Millan, for clearing that up for everyone.

Game. Set. And match.

via: Reddit

Just gonna go out on a limb here and say that, yes, he did read the privacy policy. I'm going to go ahead and toss out the notion that he closed his eyes and just typed without reading.

Oh, he's played it all right.

via: Reddit

I hope to one day reach the level of fame when I can become the end boss of a video game. And that video game is Street Fighter II.. I would like to beat up M. Bison.

You always gotta check that profile pic, my man.

via: Reddit

Although, what's the ruling on using your Twitter jokes in your stand-up set? It almost feels like they're two completely different mediums and the joke shouldn't translate? I mean, my oil paintings don't make for great comic books.

It's Microsoft-on-Microsoft crime.

via: Reddit

Should Microsoft double-check that their own software isn't corrupting their own Microsoft software? Probably. Will they? Eh, who knows, probably not.

She wrote a whole book about it.

via: Reddit

Like it or not, Chelsea Clinton probably has a ton of experience with certain aspects of governing, and healthcare specifically — which was her mother's prime initiative in 1993 — is probably one of those aspects.

Are girls even capable of playing video games?

via: Reddit

The irony here is that this dude is accusing this girl of not playing The Last of Us while he himself has not played The Last of Us enough to know its entire voice cast! We got us a fake gamer guy here!

Jason Schreier is our greatest video games journalist.

via: Reddit

Kotaku reporter Jason Schreier knows every little secret in the video game industry, so yes, if someone dropped any background info on what Sony's doing with the Playstation 5, it was him. He did the dropping.

Weird flex but okay.

via: Reddit

It's too bad this girl didn't know Colgate owned Tom's of Maine, but that doesn't change the fact that she hates Colgate? There truly is no hero in this story.

At least they're self-aware.

via: Reddit

Sometimes, we dig ourselves into a hole so deep, the only option is to keep digging down and hoping you one day come out the other side. And then when you get out, you dig eight more holes.

Playstation rules.

via: Reddit

I am so over guys assuming girls don't play video games. From now on, let's just assume everyone plays video games. And so, with that in mind, how's everyone enjoying that Resident Evil 3 remake? Does it hold up to the Playstation original in your opinion?

If you have to ask, it probably is.

via: Reddit

Sometimes, people online make jokes. You'd do well to remember that before you start replying. It's just a good check: "is this so off-base it must be ironic?"

The Battle of the Book-Writers.

via: Reddit

One thing that is very funny to me is that one guy posted a book he wrote on the topic they're talking about, and the other guy published a book that proves he's incredibly, stupidly biased.

The wildlife technicians roam among us.

via: Reddit

I wonder what the internet would be like if we assumed everyone was an expert on what they were talking about? What if, when we saw something we disagreed with, we approached it with curiosity? Like, "I thought x, but you think y. Why is that?" Eh, I'm sure we'd get to name-calling just as fast as we would've otherwise.

I'm sure this Bruns guy is good.

via: Reddit

To be fair to those who rejected the paper, maybe they weren't even capable of considering that THE Axel Bruns would submit a paper to lowly old them.

Yeah, do ya? Do ya?

via: Reddit

I'm just gonna go ahead and say that yeah, he does support Medicare For All. Seems pretty clear to me.

Maybe everyone is equally an expert?

via: Reddit

Hey, this guy has had pets all his life! He's never caused them pain! You know how he knows? *crickets*

In this tweet, the hero is the villain and vice versa.

via: Reddit

This is a bummer because Scott Adams really and truly sucks, but hey, someone tried to call him out and was wrong, so we're legally obligated to post it here. Sorry, them's the rules.

The stupid here is unbelievable, but not in the way you think...

via: Reddit

Maybe they knew this guy was a doctor, but they just wanted them to go to the hospital and not get paid?

You don't need a degree to make this call.

via: Reddit

Even without the rest of this post's context, I am very inclined to believe that this person is a narcissist. Non-narcissists go "You think I'm a narcissist? Oh no, what could I have done to make that impression? Time to evaluate my behavior!"

The source is me. I am the source.

via: Reddit

Listen, if anyone's going to have access to these stats, it's the Chief Public Health Officer of Canada. But... she should still cite her sources! That's what I learned form my high school English teacher, who hated Wikipedia.

People switch careers sometimes.

via: Reddit

It's easy to think of Bill Gates as the Microsoft founder, or even as a plain ol' d-bag billionaire. But he's spent a lot of time working on ways to manage communicable diseases.

This is, of course, the very mayor they speak of.

via: Reddit

It is very funny to try and cite the mayor as your defender, only to find out that the mayor was working against you the entire time. This has to be how pro wrestlers feel when their tag-team partner turns on them.

Um, whoops.

via: Reddit

It was definitely possible for a Japanese major to make a mistake (I've been speaking English since I was born and I mess it up all the time). But this "Okay yes am not smart I mistranslated it" tells the entire story. It is deeply satisfying to see someone admit they're wrong.

You know, she kinda does...

via: Reddit

Maybe I'm crazy, but in looking at that split-screen, I think she looks younger in the picture on the left, which was taken after The Office ended. And I am not just saying that to try and score brownie points with Jenna Fischer, who I've had a crush on since season one of The Office. I am not.

"Hey buddy, why don't you spend more time with an equally valid medium?!"

via: Reddit

As a video game player myself, I hate this stigma that books are somehow more valid than video games. We don't say oil paintings are any better than gauche paintings, do we? Different artistic mediums are just different, they're no better and no worse than each other! Criminey!

I guess some people get into ticket-taking to exert power.

via: Reddit

I would have loved it if our girl Malorie here had asked, "You want to tell them the whole thing's canceled because you wanted to flex your muscles?"

And I think that, by writing this tweet, they've done it!

via: Reddit

Congratulations self, you've given credit to yourself. Now it's time for a nap — you've earned it.

"Did you ask our boss, Mr. Guardian?"

via: Reddit

To be fair, The Guardian is a big publication. Not everyone knows each other. The real villain of this story is the guy being asked, because hey man, you don't have to give the stuff you make on your own time to your employer! What kind of example are you setting here?

A wild anti-vaxxer appeared!

via: Reddit

It will never not be hilarious to me when someone who has glanced over an article that ""confirms"" (I put double quotes around it to show how much I'm rolling my eyes as I said it ) something they were already emotionally predisposed to believing before they even clicked.

"Women should only talk about feminism."

via: Reddit

It's almost like women can have opinions on feminism and foreign affairs and, hell, even the next Mario Kart game without being told what they should or should not "stick to."

I like this guy.

via: Reddit

It seems like he might hate triathlons? It would be truly heartbreaking if the world's best triathlete hated the one thing he was good at.

Always assume everyone is Stanton.

via: Reddit

If, at the next conference you go to, you just begin each conversation with, "Hello Stanton," sure, you'll confuse some people. But is that worse than talking to Stanton and not calling them Stanton? I say no.

Margaret Atwood needs to get around to checking out this Handmaid's Tale thing.

via: Reddit

Here's my big question about this guy — what did he disagree wit in Atwood's tweet? "Women must heed the warning?" Did he watch The Handmaid's Tale and think, "Women got it pretty good here"?

Young Thug has a pretty great go-to response.

via: Reddit

But what we're all wondering — and I'm sure the grandkids are wondering too — is this: Did he pull up his pants?

Great advice.

via: Reddit

"Why don't you shut up? Go run for office." "I did. And I won." "Okay-- well-- but-- have you ever run for two offices? Didn't think so. Checkmate."

Keep them sources comin.'

via: Reddit

How many trades would the Blue Jays trades if the Blue Jays could trade Jays? Just a fun little thing for you to think about.

You know what happens when you assume...

via: Reddit

Imagine receiving the information that a woman was good at coding and assuming, "they must not be good at coding, and this information must be hyperbole>"

"Let me tell you about a bad, bad man..."

via: Reddit

I hope this guy's report was full of stuff like, "Don't tell him I told you this" or "Of course, I'd never say this to his face, but..." so he can be really embarrassed when he realizes who he's been talking to.

Well-respected journalists can't get anything wrong. It's just not possible.

via: Reddit

In defense of this guy who did not know who he was talking to, you never really expect to run into Seth Rogen on Twitter. You expect to run into Seth Rogen at GameStop, or at a pizza place in the middle of the night.

I am very worried the person Lucian Kim said this to went, "Huh?"

via: Reddit

Although, if they know Lucian Kim from the radio, it's kind of a jerk move to expect that someone would recognize you.

"You know nothing about the thing you have."

via: Reddit

What's scary about Twitter exchanges like this is that people online just say stuff without any need to back it up. It's bananas.

Reality ends at the picture frame for the models too.

via: Reddit

I think some people (men-type people...) just feel a need to argue with women about anything when they feel threatened. It's actually kind of sad, if you think about it.

Don't forget to check the username, my man.

via: Reddit

James Lucian is happy to give credit to James Lucian, but would James Lucian really want all that spotlight? Only James Lucian would know.

Oh Joel! *entire studio audience laughs*

via: Reddit

I don't know who Wilbur is, but this Twitter guy does, and apparently Wilbur is so important to him that he has to defend against Wilbur fan accounts posting about anything that is not Wilbur. Seems like a good use of his time.

Chris Boswell slides in with the diss.

via: Reddit

You tell 'em, Chris Boswell! But also, make more onside kicks so the fans don't jump on you like that.

*PSST* Ed Solomon wrote Men in Black.

via: Reddit

If only someone would tell us about the ideas origins of Men in Black. The only candidate I can think of is the writer of Men in Black for the love of god.

Everyone's always confusing Tony Hawk for another feature-less white dude.

via: Reddit

I think Tony Hawk just has one of those faces. We all know what it looks like, but it's not specific enough so that when we see him in real life, we'd actually know.

Rage Against the Machine 'bout to rage against the barista.

via: Reddit

Some people just can't wrap their heads around the fact that they're meeting a celebrity — it's just such a crazy thing and you can never imagine it happening to you! I felt that way when I first moved to LA (for about 10 minutes before I saw the entire cast of Glee at Chipotle and seeing celebrities became mundane).

Which one would you choose?

via: Reddit

I played maybe 150 ours of The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, and I don't remember this scene. Maybe I should pick it back up and see if I can find this character, because I've always wanted to be someone who gets to say "don't you know who I am" and doing it in a video game might be my only chance.

A swing and a miss.

via: Reddit

Just because no one would ever marry you doesn't mean no one would ever marry this guy who you're arbitrarily trying to insult by saying a woman he has clearly slept with would not sleep with him.

This dumb kid.

via: Reddit

I hope Chris Hemsworth swung the mighty hammer Mjölnir and knocked this little brat right out. Know who plays your favorite superheroes, kid.

A med student interrupts the lead surgeon.

via: Reddit

A lot of people get into the doctoring field to feel important. Usually, though, you double-check that the person whose name you're trading on to appear important isn't, you know, in the room. But hey, they're just a med student. They'll learn.

Who names the Star Wars?

via: Reddit

How many names would a Star Wars name if a Star Wars could name Wars? (I guess the answer is nine.)

The real Matilda

via: Twitter

This poor girl working concessions didn't realize that she was talking to the real live actress who played the title character in her supposedly favorite movie!

A paper as evidence

via: Twitter

This is totally bonkers. Mansplaining is among the most common sexist microaggressions out there. I don't know a woman who hasn't dealt with it.

The real Tony Hawk

via: Twitter

Tony Hawk has a bunch of similar stories on his Twitter. Apparently, he's hard to recognize in real life (especially because the name on his ID is "Anthony").

"Learn some actual science"

via: Imgur

I just love when people can throw their advanced degrees in the faces of their detractors. That's pretty much why you get a Ph.D., to begin with, right?

I believe...

via: Reddit

I suppose when you're the CEO of the company, you have some authority over the name of the company.

"Learn it"

via: Reddit

Ugh, that winky face is so disgusting. It's just like a man to be like, "Maybe if you understood..." She understands quite well, thank you very much.

Olympic swimmer

via: Twitter

This poor lady had no idea that she was talking to an actual Olympic swimmer. What a silly conversation. She didn't even grasp it after Lizzie was like, "I WENT TO THE OLYMPICS."

Lewis Black

via: Reddit

Yup, that's a picture of Lewis Black watching people take a picture with a poster with a picture of Lewis Black. Inception!

Explaining Snape

via: Reddit

This person really just tried to explain Snape's character to J. K. Rowling, who literally created him. Out of thin air. Snape is hers.

Don't bother

via: Twitter

These rude gentlemen may have just blown the biggest career opportunity they'd ever have because C.B. Cebulski just so happens to be a talent scout for Marvel Comics.

Shame on you

via: Reddit

First of all, how and why would this person claim to be noticing a pattern if she wasn't professionally involved in the area?! Dudes are such dudes.

"Clone Wars"

via: Reddit

Gotta love when the actor calls out the person who so flippantly disregarded their actual name. Like, come on now! It's called Google.

Write a book

via: Reddit

Another man giving unsolicited advice to a woman who is way more qualified than he is to speak on a subject. Get a life, Greg!

"Aw cute!"

via: Reddit

This person spoke very eloquently about this issue in the top comment. Why would you disparage them? Nub_Zar got what they deserved.

His dad

via: Reddit

I would think Jay Rodriguez's dad would know a thing or two about his career. I love that he's on Twitter defending his son's honor.

Green Arrow

via: Reddit

This thing about this exchange is that Chris O'Donnell didn't play Green Arrow. ...Stephen Amell did.

Jo Sharp

via: Reddit

This is totally bonkers. But I have another question: Why was Jo Sharp writing a paper about her own work?

Illegal immigrants

via: Reddit

Wow. This is beyond. Newsflash: Weeeee stole this country. This Navajo congressman's family is more legal than those Trump supporters, I can tell you that.

Laser rust remover

via: Reddit

Ah yes, the Internet. I can always count on your for heated discussions about the price of industrial laser rust remover. What would I do without you?

World War II

via: Reddit

"Kimberly" is absolutely the best name to be able to say when you are about to own someone so hard for being ignorant. It just works so well.

Natalie Portman

via: Tumblr

Hilarious. They're making fun of Natalie Portman for being a "hipster" who "probably hasn't even seen all the movies," but she was in Star Wars.

"How would you know?"

via: Reddit

Be careful who you pose this question to. They could come up with a very complete and thorough answer to which you will have no good reply.

Tested

via: Twitter

In her Tinder bio it says she writes for Marvel Comics, and still, this dude is like, "Yeah but are you a real fan?" No, she's not. It's literally her job.

Woody or Woody

via: Reddit

This might be the best note I've ever seen someone write in a book. Maybe this person genuinely wanted Woody Harrelson's autograph but only had this Woody Allen book on them.

"Got any sources?"

via: Reddit

Well, that very thorough explanation of their expertise as well as the sources they provide shut that person up quickly, didn't it?

Bandwagon fan

via: Twitter

Yeah, I don't think this guy is a bandwagon fan. You see...he's a player on the team of which he speaks.

Snap a pic

via: Twitter

Look, even famous people are people, so they can be asked to snap a picture. I hope they realized what they did and took a pic with her after, though.

Source?

Hm, it seems to be that the prime minister of Malta might have some pretty reliable sources. I would probably just trust what he says.

The real Mr. Bean

from funny
Rowan Atkinson is a pretty...distinct looking fellow. I would like to think that if I saw him walking down the street, I would recognize him.

Clinical aromatherapist

Sorry, but a clinical aromatherapist (whatever that is) does not out-rank an actual "medical professional," whether a doctor, a nurse, or someone who works reception in a doctor's office.

Pit bulls

Professional dog behaviorist for the win!! Pit bulls are such sweet animals. Retrievers and labs can actually naturally be really crazy. Pit bulls are so much better than their reputation.

Real psychologist

Just because she's young and hip and knows how to upload a video onto YouTube doesn't mean she didn't actually go to school for the stuff she's talking about. Lesson learned.

Democratic party

Not only did this guy totally insult the former spokesman for the Democratic Party, but he also thought it was called the Democrat Party. What world is this man living in?

The owner

And that's what you get if you try to play the owner of the arcade. Also, $5 an hour is very reasonable!!! Just pay it!

Let me list the ways

This snooty person "found it interesting" that this person would comment on security clearances as if they were an expert until the person clearly stated three different ways in which they were an expert.

Thanks for the input

UGH. Men, am I right?

Poor police work

When a retired cop calls out poor police work, believe them. Share this with someone who needs a laugh!