The Internet is a democratizing force. Like, trash trolls and award-winning scientists and dumb people and brilliant authors can all have Twitter accounts. I don't really know what that says about the state of our society, but this democratization of the Internet has certain specific effects. On the one hand, it's really amazing. If you have a science question, you can easily find a scientist in that particular field and ask it.
On the other hand, though, if you want to be dumb enough to tell off someone who turns out to be an expert in their field, whether it's science or politics or business or urban planning or whatever, you're going to get owned, someone will screenshot it, and it will end up all over the place, like in this gallery, for example. So, don't be like the people in this gallery. Do your homework before you look extremely silly in front of millions of people on the Internet.
The thing about the Internet is that experts on almost every subject lurk in the corners.You can never be too sure who you're talking to, so it's best just to be ultra respectful and understanding about where people are coming from.
For example, if you work at a radio station and you don't know who Annie Lennox is, maybe don't email her.
via: FacebookShe's, um, a superstar, and this guy wants to "give her a chance." This is insanity!
via: TwitterThis is so cringeworthy! This person is basically like, "How could you, a woman, possibly be a professor with her own lab?" In 2018.
Please tell me this is a joke.
via: RedditIt would be very, very funny to demand of Stephen King an answer to whether or not he's read "The Stand." It's not like the guy wrote it or anything...
Are girls even capable of reading comics?
via: RedditWe got a whole lot of projection going on here. I bet ol' Sam Elliot's Mustache secretly thinks reading comics is beneath him.
PSST. That's, uh, the lady Julia Roberts' character was based on.
via: RedditI bet this story is going to make it into Elizabeth Gilbert's next book, "Eat Pray Make A Fool Of Yourself."
One cool thing about Chipper Jones: he's a first-ballot MLB Hall of Famer.
via: RedditAnother cool thing about Chipper Jones: he cold rob the Atlanta Braves blind if he wanted to, what with all this unfettered access. The security guard would never know.
"Do your research" is code for "I've decided I'm right and am done listening to you prove me wrong."
via: RedditOne key phrase that will tell you you've won an argument is when your opponent says "do your research." If they had an argument, they'd just make it themselves.
He's America's dad.
via: RedditDoes this count as a celebrity sighting? If this dude texted all his friends about this, would they think it's cool, or would they be like, "So? I've got a dentist with kids too, dude."
Oh what a tangled web.
via: RedditThis is very funny because it's neither Stars nor Metric, but is in fact Broken Social Scene. Thank you, Amy Millan, for clearing that up for everyone.
Game. Set. And match.
Oh, he's played it all right.
via: RedditI hope to one day reach the level of fame when I can become the end boss of a video game. And that video game is Street Fighter II.. I would like to beat up M. Bison.
You always gotta check that profile pic, my man.
via: RedditAlthough, what's the ruling on using your Twitter jokes in your stand-up set? It almost feels like they're two completely different mediums and the joke shouldn't translate? I mean, my oil paintings don't make for great comic books.
It's Microsoft-on-Microsoft crime.
via: RedditShould Microsoft double-check that their own software isn't corrupting their own Microsoft software? Probably. Will they? Eh, who knows, probably not.
She wrote a whole book about it.
via: RedditLike it or not, Chelsea Clinton probably has a ton of experience with certain aspects of governing, and healthcare specifically — which was her mother's prime initiative in 1993 — is probably one of those aspects.
Are girls even capable of playing video games?
via: RedditThe irony here is that this dude is accusing this girl of not playing The Last of Us while he himself has not played The Last of Us enough to know its entire voice cast! We got us a fake gamer guy here!
Jason Schreier is our greatest video games journalist.
via: RedditKotaku reporter Jason Schreier knows every little secret in the video game industry, so yes, if someone dropped any background info on what Sony's doing with the Playstation 5, it was him. He did the dropping.
Weird flex but okay.
via: RedditIt's too bad this girl didn't know Colgate owned Tom's of Maine, but that doesn't change the fact that she hates Colgate? There truly is no hero in this story.
At least they're self-aware.
via: RedditSometimes, we dig ourselves into a hole so deep, the only option is to keep digging down and hoping you one day come out the other side. And then when you get out, you dig eight more holes.
via: RedditI am so over guys assuming girls don't play video games. From now on, let's just assume everyone plays video games. And so, with that in mind, how's everyone enjoying that Resident Evil 3 remake? Does it hold up to the Playstation original in your opinion?
If you have to ask, it probably is.
via: RedditSometimes, people online make jokes. You'd do well to remember that before you start replying. It's just a good check: "is this so off-base it must be ironic?"
The Battle of the Book-Writers.
via: RedditOne thing that is very funny to me is that one guy posted a book he wrote on the topic they're talking about, and the other guy published a book that proves he's incredibly, stupidly biased.
The wildlife technicians roam among us.
via: RedditI wonder what the internet would be like if we assumed everyone was an expert on what they were talking about? What if, when we saw something we disagreed with, we approached it with curiosity? Like, "I thought x, but you think y. Why is that?" Eh, I'm sure we'd get to name-calling just as fast as we would've otherwise.
I'm sure this Bruns guy is good.
via: RedditTo be fair to those who rejected the paper, maybe they weren't even capable of considering that THE Axel Bruns would submit a paper to lowly old them.
Yeah, do ya? Do ya?
via: RedditI'm just gonna go ahead and say that yeah, he does support Medicare For All. Seems pretty clear to me.
Maybe everyone is equally an expert?
via: RedditHey, this guy has had pets all his life! He's never caused them pain! You know how he knows? *crickets*
In this tweet, the hero is the villain and vice versa.
via: RedditThis is a bummer because Scott Adams really and truly sucks, but hey, someone tried to call him out and was wrong, so we're legally obligated to post it here. Sorry, them's the rules.
The stupid here is unbelievable, but not in the way you think...
via: RedditMaybe they knew this guy was a doctor, but they just wanted them to go to the hospital and not get paid?
You don't need a degree to make this call.
via: RedditEven without the rest of this post's context, I am very inclined to believe that this person is a narcissist. Non-narcissists go "You think I'm a narcissist? Oh no, what could I have done to make that impression? Time to evaluate my behavior!"
The source is me. I am the source.
via: RedditListen, if anyone's going to have access to these stats, it's the Chief Public Health Officer of Canada. But... she should still cite her sources! That's what I learned form my high school English teacher, who hated Wikipedia.
People switch careers sometimes.
via: RedditIt's easy to think of Bill Gates as the Microsoft founder, or even as a plain ol' d-bag billionaire. But he's spent a lot of time working on ways to manage communicable diseases.
This is, of course, the very mayor they speak of.
via: RedditIt is very funny to try and cite the mayor as your defender, only to find out that the mayor was working against you the entire time. This has to be how pro wrestlers feel when their tag-team partner turns on them.
via: RedditIt was definitely possible for a Japanese major to make a mistake (I've been speaking English since I was born and I mess it up all the time). But this "Okay yes am not smart I mistranslated it" tells the entire story. It is deeply satisfying to see someone admit they're wrong.
You know, she kinda does...
via: RedditMaybe I'm crazy, but in looking at that split-screen, I think she looks younger in the picture on the left, which was taken after The Office ended. And I am not just saying that to try and score brownie points with Jenna Fischer, who I've had a crush on since season one of The Office. I am not.
"Hey buddy, why don't you spend more time with an equally valid medium?!"
via: RedditAs a video game player myself, I hate this stigma that books are somehow more valid than video games. We don't say oil paintings are any better than gauche paintings, do we? Different artistic mediums are just different, they're no better and no worse than each other! Criminey!
I guess some people get into ticket-taking to exert power.
via: RedditI would have loved it if our girl Malorie here had asked, "You want to tell them the whole thing's canceled because you wanted to flex your muscles?"
And I think that, by writing this tweet, they've done it!
via: RedditCongratulations self, you've given credit to yourself. Now it's time for a nap — you've earned it.
"Did you ask our boss, Mr. Guardian?"
via: RedditTo be fair, The Guardian is a big publication. Not everyone knows each other. The real villain of this story is the guy being asked, because hey man, you don't have to give the stuff you make on your own time to your employer! What kind of example are you setting here?
A wild anti-vaxxer appeared!
via: RedditIt will never not be hilarious to me when someone who has glanced over an article that ""confirms"" (I put double quotes around it to show how much I'm rolling my eyes as I said it ) something they were already emotionally predisposed to believing before they even clicked.
"Women should only talk about feminism."
via: RedditIt's almost like women can have opinions on feminism and foreign affairs and, hell, even the next Mario Kart game without being told what they should or should not "stick to."
I like this guy.
via: RedditIt seems like he might hate triathlons? It would be truly heartbreaking if the world's best triathlete hated the one thing he was good at.
Always assume everyone is Stanton.
via: RedditIf, at the next conference you go to, you just begin each conversation with, "Hello Stanton," sure, you'll confuse some people. But is that worse than talking to Stanton and not calling them Stanton? I say no.
Margaret Atwood needs to get around to checking out this Handmaid's Tale thing.
via: RedditHere's my big question about this guy — what did he disagree wit in Atwood's tweet? "Women must heed the warning?" Did he watch The Handmaid's Tale and think, "Women got it pretty good here"?
Young Thug has a pretty great go-to response.
via: RedditBut what we're all wondering — and I'm sure the grandkids are wondering too — is this: Did he pull up his pants?
via: Reddit"Why don't you shut up? Go run for office." "I did. And I won." "Okay-- well-- but-- have you ever run for two offices? Didn't think so. Checkmate."
Keep them sources comin.'
via: RedditHow many trades would the Blue Jays trades if the Blue Jays could trade Jays? Just a fun little thing for you to think about.
You know what happens when you assume...
via: RedditImagine receiving the information that a woman was good at coding and assuming, "they must not be good at coding, and this information must be hyperbole>"
"Let me tell you about a bad, bad man..."
via: RedditI hope this guy's report was full of stuff like, "Don't tell him I told you this" or "Of course, I'd never say this to his face, but..." so he can be really embarrassed when he realizes who he's been talking to.
Well-respected journalists can't get anything wrong. It's just not possible.
via: RedditIn defense of this guy who did not know who he was talking to, you never really expect to run into Seth Rogen on Twitter. You expect to run into Seth Rogen at GameStop, or at a pizza place in the middle of the night.
I am very worried the person Lucian Kim said this to went, "Huh?"
via: RedditAlthough, if they know Lucian Kim from the radio, it's kind of a jerk move to expect that someone would recognize you.
"You know nothing about the thing you have."
via: RedditWhat's scary about Twitter exchanges like this is that people online just say stuff without any need to back it up. It's bananas.
Reality ends at the picture frame for the models too.
via: RedditI think some people (men-type people...) just feel a need to argue with women about anything when they feel threatened. It's actually kind of sad, if you think about it.
Don't forget to check the username, my man.
via: RedditJames Lucian is happy to give credit to James Lucian, but would James Lucian really want all that spotlight? Only James Lucian would know.
Oh Joel! *entire studio audience laughs*
via: RedditI don't know who Wilbur is, but this Twitter guy does, and apparently Wilbur is so important to him that he has to defend against Wilbur fan accounts posting about anything that is not Wilbur. Seems like a good use of his time.
Chris Boswell slides in with the diss.
via: RedditYou tell 'em, Chris Boswell! But also, make more onside kicks so the fans don't jump on you like that.
*PSST* Ed Solomon wrote Men in Black.
via: RedditIf only someone would tell us about the ideas origins of Men in Black. The only candidate I can think of is the writer of Men in Black for the love of god.
Everyone's always confusing Tony Hawk for another feature-less white dude.
via: RedditI think Tony Hawk just has one of those faces. We all know what it looks like, but it's not specific enough so that when we see him in real life, we'd actually know.
Rage Against the Machine 'bout to rage against the barista.
via: RedditSome people just can't wrap their heads around the fact that they're meeting a celebrity — it's just such a crazy thing and you can never imagine it happening to you! I felt that way when I first moved to LA (for about 10 minutes before I saw the entire cast of Glee at Chipotle and seeing celebrities became mundane).
Which one would you choose?
via: RedditI played maybe 150 ours of The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, and I don't remember this scene. Maybe I should pick it back up and see if I can find this character, because I've always wanted to be someone who gets to say "don't you know who I am" and doing it in a video game might be my only chance.
A swing and a miss.
via: RedditJust because no one would ever marry you doesn't mean no one would ever marry this guy who you're arbitrarily trying to insult by saying a woman he has clearly slept with would not sleep with him.
This dumb kid.
via: RedditI hope Chris Hemsworth swung the mighty hammer Mjölnir and knocked this little brat right out. Know who plays your favorite superheroes, kid.
A med student interrupts the lead surgeon.
via: RedditA lot of people get into the doctoring field to feel important. Usually, though, you double-check that the person whose name you're trading on to appear important isn't, you know, in the room. But hey, they're just a med student. They'll learn.
Who names the Star Wars?
via: RedditHow many names would a Star Wars name if a Star Wars could name Wars? (I guess the answer is nine.)
The real Matilda
via: TwitterThis poor girl working concessions didn't realize that she was talking to the real live actress who played the title character in her supposedly favorite movie!
A paper as evidence
via: TwitterThis is totally bonkers. Mansplaining is among the most common sexist microaggressions out there. I don't know a woman who hasn't dealt with it.
The real Tony Hawk
via: TwitterTony Hawk has a bunch of similar stories on his Twitter. Apparently, he's hard to recognize in real life (especially because the name on his ID is "Anthony").
"Learn some actual science"
via: ImgurI just love when people can throw their advanced degrees in the faces of their detractors. That's pretty much why you get a Ph.D., to begin with, right?
via: RedditI suppose when you're the CEO of the company, you have some authority over the name of the company.
via: RedditUgh, that winky face is so disgusting. It's just like a man to be like, "Maybe if you understood..." She understands quite well, thank you very much.
via: TwitterThis poor lady had no idea that she was talking to an actual Olympic swimmer. What a silly conversation. She didn't even grasp it after Lizzie was like, "I WENT TO THE OLYMPICS."
via: RedditYup, that's a picture of Lewis Black watching people take a picture with a poster with a picture of Lewis Black. Inception!
via: RedditThis person really just tried to explain Snape's character to J. K. Rowling, who literally created him. Out of thin air. Snape is hers.
via: TwitterThese rude gentlemen may have just blown the biggest career opportunity they'd ever have because C.B. Cebulski just so happens to be a talent scout for Marvel Comics.
Shame on you
via: RedditFirst of all, how and why would this person claim to be noticing a pattern if she wasn't professionally involved in the area?! Dudes are such dudes.
via: RedditGotta love when the actor calls out the person who so flippantly disregarded their actual name. Like, come on now! It's called Google.
Write a book
via: RedditAnother man giving unsolicited advice to a woman who is way more qualified than he is to speak on a subject. Get a life, Greg!
via: RedditThis person spoke very eloquently about this issue in the top comment. Why would you disparage them? Nub_Zar got what they deserved.
via: RedditI would think Jay Rodriguez's dad would know a thing or two about his career. I love that he's on Twitter defending his son's honor.
via: RedditThis thing about this exchange is that Chris O'Donnell didn't play Green Arrow. ...Stephen Amell did.
via: RedditThis is totally bonkers. But I have another question: Why was Jo Sharp writing a paper about her own work?
via: RedditWow. This is beyond. Newsflash: Weeeee stole this country. This Navajo congressman's family is more legal than those Trump supporters, I can tell you that.
Laser rust remover
via: RedditAh yes, the Internet. I can always count on your for heated discussions about the price of industrial laser rust remover. What would I do without you?
World War II
via: Reddit"Kimberly" is absolutely the best name to be able to say when you are about to own someone so hard for being ignorant. It just works so well.
via: TumblrHilarious. They're making fun of Natalie Portman for being a "hipster" who "probably hasn't even seen all the movies," but she was in Star Wars.
"How would you know?"
via: RedditBe careful who you pose this question to. They could come up with a very complete and thorough answer to which you will have no good reply.
via: TwitterIn her Tinder bio it says she writes for Marvel Comics, and still, this dude is like, "Yeah but are you a real fan?" No, she's not. It's literally her job.
Woody or Woody
via: RedditThis might be the best note I've ever seen someone write in a book. Maybe this person genuinely wanted Woody Harrelson's autograph but only had this Woody Allen book on them.
"Got any sources?"
via: RedditWell, that very thorough explanation of their expertise as well as the sources they provide shut that person up quickly, didn't it?
via: TwitterYeah, I don't think this guy is a bandwagon fan. You see...he's a player on the team of which he speaks.
Snap a pic
via: TwitterLook, even famous people are people, so they can be asked to snap a picture. I hope they realized what they did and took a pic with her after, though.
The real Mr. Bean