OK, real talk for a second: I am a couple of weeks away from turning 30. Mostly, I feel fine about it. Mostly, I am actually really excited about it! Finally, I will no longer be floundering in my twenties, directionless and unstable. Oh, I will still be directionless and unstable, but at least I will be 30, so it will seem like I am that way on purpose. More than anything, I can't wait to finally have an acceptable excuse to not do the things I already skip out on but have no good excuse for. "I can't come to your comedy show at 10 p.m. on a Tuesday. I'm 30!" "No, I can't do a shot of tequila with you. I'm 30!" You get the picture.
So, in that way, 30 will be glorious. And yet, I can't seem to fully escape the thoughts that many people who are trying to navigate adulthood have. I spend a disproportionate amount of my life now experiencing new and different bodily pains and deciding whether or not their warrant a visit to the doctor. I get excited about cleaning my house. I legit never go to bed past 10, and if I am forced to, I get cranky. For all the perks of being an adult, there are also drawbacks that we never considered when we were kids and perpetually dreaming of the day we could live our own lives.
Responsibilities really smack you in the face the second you enter adulthood, huh?It's not fun. Sure, you live alone now and can keep the lights on all night long if you want, but then you have to pay that electric bill.
Early 20sAh, your early 20s. What a preposterous time in a person's life. In your early 20s, you no doubt learn that nothing good ever happens after 11 p.m.
Adulthood is a scam https://t.co/cilQHeduT7— Haley Michaell (@Haley Michaell)1549705305.0
One of the weirder things about being an adult is having a favorite stovetop burner, yet nobody talks about it. https://t.co/M6QWXJ9coy— Andrew Armstrong (@Andrew Armstrong)1543350768.0
Waking up every morning wondering if you’re coming down with a cold, or if this is just how you wake up now.— Nina (@Nina)1513960383.0
Adulthood is just saying “if I can just get through this week” over and over again until you die.— Amy Who? (@Amy Who?)1549433673.0
GruntingI am so ashamed of some of the involuntary noises I already make because I'm an adult and doing everyday things has become uncomfortable.
Big old lettersEveryone in my life makes fun of me because I made the text on my phone as big as it can possibly be, but it's easier to see! Why wouldn't I make it easier to see?
Food at homeThis is the worst. I'm really bad at this. "Sure, we have all the ingredients to make dinner, or I could order dinner and wait for food to be delivered to me while I watch One Day at a Time."
Favorite grocery store
One day you're not old and the next day you have a favorite grocery store.— Dead Pan Nick (@Dead Pan Nick)1482002466.0
The sneeze effectOh really? Well, I am throw-my-neck-out-by-turning-my-neck-a-teeny-bit years old, so I think I'm older.
Expectation vs. reality
What I thought adulthood was gonna be: 1. Late nights 2. Ice cream any time of day 3. Doing what I want What adu… https://t.co/5SGAYebBeK— ~*Wellness Witchery*~ (@~*Wellness Witchery*~)1549396257.0
So many dishes
90% of adulthood is alternating between dirtying dishes and washing dishes.— a wisp of cotton candy (@a wisp of cotton candy)1549430684.0
made a lot of strides in adulthood but as far as "going out to buy kleenex when i'm sick when there is a perfectly… https://t.co/SAZV4eNPtM— Casey Johnston (@Casey Johnston)1548779100.0
I’m officially “if you text me at 12:18 am I will respond at 6:33 am” years old.— Jess (@Jess)1549453000.0
Parking the car
One of the hardest jobs in adulthood is trying to remember where you parked your car.— Mickey Cattle (@Mickey Cattle)1549133250.0
The real passage into adulthood is the moment you seek the rye slices in Chex Mix or Gordettos.— Absurdest 🔞 Pinnedtweet (@Absurdest 🔞 Pinnedtweet)1549909062.0
Staring into the void
adulthood is 60% staring into the void— Kyle Kallgren is Always Antifascist (@Kyle Kallgren is Always Antifascist)1549747686.0
Why is my skin worse now than when I was going through puberty adulthood is a scam— Carly (@Carly)1549864202.0
just got very excited because i remembered that i bought myself a new tube of toothpaste but one of those cool ones… https://t.co/NVOYX5tNvC— niamh (@niamh)1549842384.0
I regret every nap i passed up as a child— kate🖤 (@kate🖤)1548441416.0
Adulthood is getting your taxes back and being excited about paying off cards/loans. Sweet sweet adulthood https://t.co/bCM9H6DcL0— Ashley (@Ashley)1549643028.0
Adulthood is having to postpone your mental breakdown because you need to cook your lunch and do your laundry— Yara (@Yara)1548931936.0
I cleaned my whole living room and kitchen (including cleaning out/WASHING the inside of the fridge) yesterday and… https://t.co/xCfb1BjAP5— Valerie Anne (@Valerie Anne)1549915109.0
This is such an accurate metaphor for adulthood. https://t.co/2JifdvTpBZ— Netflix ANZ (@Netflix ANZ)1549856809.0
Favorite childhood memory
My favorite childhood memory is my back not hurting— dayton (@dayton)1548996493.0
Replacing your sponge
If replacing a dirty dish sponge with a new one puts you in a good mood, you’re officially an adult https://t.co/LyyUrgqWIp— Modern Adult (@Modern Adult)1525368171.0
Yoga for lower back pain
adulthood is: https://t.co/rEt9OZT5aN— Scarlett Eliza (@Scarlett Eliza)1549601204.0
8 p.m. movie
Me at 18: as long as I’m in bed by 3 AM I’m good Me now: it’s already 8PM, we can’t start a movie this late— Modern Adult (@Modern Adult)1524873446.0