If you are having a boring day at the office, FEAR NOT! We are here to turn your day around.
First of all, who here loves squirrels?
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Sure, they can be a little obnoxious and grabby, but they are most seriously cute. Their twitchy noses, furry nails. I love them.
The way they run, their goofy little expressions.
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Step aside bald eagle, I hereby nominate the squirrel as our new national mascot.
Oh, you want one more adorable and hilarious squirrel GIF? Okay, we can accommodate.
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There. You happy now?
Okay, now back to the story.
Question two: who out there in internet-land loves PIZZA?
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YOU DO! You love pizza! I love it too. Pizza rocks! Break me off a greasy slice of that cheesy goodness and let's do this thing!
Pizza truly makes the world go 'round! It's the one thing that can unite people of all races, genders, religions and creeds.
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Everyone loves pizza, human and animal alike.
Which is what makes this story so delectable. So, what exactly happened?
When you put squirrels and pizza together, you know that you are in for a heckuva time!
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And while we know critters from all over the animal kingdom go crazy for our leftover scraps, it's not everyday that we get to bear witness to its beautiful majesty.
Thankfully, today is not one of those days! Please welcome to the stage, America's new Superhero:
PIZZA SQUIRREL!
Look, times are tough here in America and we are ALL looking for a new champion.
The fact that Pizza Squirrel resides in D.C. only makes his story that much more relatable.
The web exploded two years ago when New York's famed PizzaRat rose to international prominence.
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But frankly, that guy sucks compared to Pizza Squirrel. Pizza Squirrel all day!
While this squirrel is most definitely the most Pizza Squirrelly Pizza Squirrel to ever Pizza Squirrel, he is far from the FIRST squirrel to enjoy pizza!
In fact, the internet is chock full of fun loving dough-heads!
There was even another one to grab international media attention.
This guy even got a full-color spread in a major newspaper!
There has even been art dedicated to their passionate love affair.
I'd love to see this picture hanging in post offices around the nation.
More squirrels loving pizza?!
They seriously love the stuff!
It could be their proximity to garbage cans and their love of dumpster diving that gets their lips so close to delicious slices of 'za.
Wait, do squirrels have lips?
But whatever the reason, we are just happy that these two have finally found one another.
And while I certainly will never get tired of talking about squirrels eating pizza, we don't want to start encouraging them too much!
Heck, I don't want them coming after MY precious pizza!
But we welcome them to try.
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I will fight them to their yummy, furry death.
Let's hope they don't start gettin' squirrely.