Parents: listen up!
A therapist has shared the 7 biggest parenting mistakes that "destroy kids' mental strength," and what we should be doing instead.
This is a real eye-opener...
Now, there's no doubt we're living in an increasingly stressful world.And of course, COVID-19 hasn't exactly helped with that.
Having the tools to deal with, well, life, is more important than ever.And, in recent years, there's been an even bigger push on self-care and maintaining mental wellbeing.
So, for those of us who are parents...It's more important than ever to look after our kids' mental wellbeing.
Instilling emotional and mental resiliency in our children is vital.
via: ShutterstockStudies have found that children who have been taught this are more likely to be engaged in school and in their future jobs.
That's not to say it's easy, though.And as parents do, we all make mistakes. After all, nobody is perfect, right?
Well, one therapist has recently shared the 7 biggest parenting mistakes that destroy kids’ mental strength...
via: ShutterstockAnd exactly what you should do instead. So, without further ado, let's get into it, as per CNBC.
1. Minimizing your kid’s feelings
via: ShutterstockWhen parents say to their kids “don’t be so sad about it" or “it’s not a big deal," they’re sending the message that feelings don’t matter and that it’s better to suppress them.
Instead, the goal is to help them practice brainstorming solutions until they find something that works.
via: ShutterstockSo, for instance, if your kid is displaying fear during a loud storm, considering saying, “I know you’re scared right now." Then ask them what they think would make them feel better as this teaches them how to manage their emotions on their own.
2. Always saving them from failure.As parents, it can be incredibly difficult to watch our children struggle through problems we know we would be able to fix for them.
But it's important to bear in mind that failure is a big part of success.If kids are never given the chance to learn about and experience failure, they’ll never develop the perseverance they need to pick themselves up after a setback.
3. Overindulging your kids.Let's be honest, if you have the means to do so, we all love giving treating our kids to everything they want. But research has shown that when you give your kids whatever they want, they don't develop key skills related to mental strength, such as self-discipline.
Instead, you want to instill the message in your kids that it’s possible to achieve whatever they want -if they work for it.
via: ShutterstockSo, how do you teach your kids self-discipline? Well, parents can do this by setting clear rules for tasks like finishing homework before getting some screen time or doing chores for more allowance (so they can buy things on their own while knowing they earned it rather than having it handed to them on a plate).
4. Expecting perfection.Of course, it's completely natural to want your children to aim big and be the best at everything, but that's not how life works. In fact, setting the bar too high can lead to self-esteem and confidence issues later in life.
Instead, make sure to set more realistic expectations.
via: ShutterstockAnd even if your kids don’t meet them, for instance, the setbacks they face will still teach them valuable lessons about perseverance and failure, as previously mentioned.
5. Making sure they always feel comfortable.There are countless things that can make kids feel out of their comfort zones. From trying new foods to making new friends, to moving schools or trying out for a sports team.
But just like experiencing failure, uncomfortable moments can also boost mental strength.Encouraging your kids to try new things is so important, especially when it comes to helping them get started... Because often, that’s the hardest part. Once they take that first step, they might realize that it isn’t as difficult as they thought it’d be. Heck, they might even enjoy it!
6. Not setting parent-child boundaries.Of course, you want your kids to be able to make their own decisions, but that's not to say they shouldn't still know who's in charge.
It's important for parents to understand the importance of boundaries and consistency.
via: ShutterstockCaving in and allowing rules to be negotiated too frequently can lead to power struggles between you and your child.