2017 has been a rough year in pretty much every aspect of life, and food is no exception. And while we're totally on board with many of the culinary trends of the year (raclette, anyone?), there were more than a few food trend disasters that we really hope disappear before 2018.

This new year should be about dialing it back and simplifying the foods we've mercilessly twisted in 2017. Donald Trump is the president. We need the rest of our lives to be easy and good.

Unicorn Foods

Food should not be rainbow colored. Drinks should not be rainbow colored. Mediocre grilled cheese that's blue, green, red, and purple is still mediocre grilled cheese. Next.

Raindrop Cake (and Other Weird Desserts)

Raindrop cake tastes like solid water and water is not a dessert flavor. Sorry. Give me a giant chocolate chip cookie NOT a jiggling bowl of jelly-like dessert ramen. Dessert needs to return to its roots in 2018! We all need to dive face first into a regular ol' chocolate cake.

Rolled Ice Cream

Oh yeah. Let's take the creamiest, yummiest dessert, make it rock hard and roll it up. That'll be appetizing. There are certain foods that exist solely to be Instagrammed, and this is one of them. Rolled ice cream is not fooling anyone into thinking it's delicious.


It's black. It's supposed to be good for you. I get it. But I don't need it in my ice cream or pizza dough or anything else. And food experts say that there aren't even health benefits from the small amounts that go into your food.

Egg Clouds

There's a special place in hell for people who take things that you can prepare easily and deliciously in less than five minutes and do the same thing (only weirder) in 20. There is no point to baked cloud eggs. Fry them up like the rest of us, then go out and accomplish something meaningful with the remaining 23 hours and 55 minutes of your day. I'm not done yet...

Glitter Lattés

Glitter sticks to everything. I don't want it on my insides.

Hot Cheeto Everything

There's Hot Cheeto pizza, Hot Cheeto dusted mac and cheese, Hot Cheeto sushi burritos...enough! These spicy snacks have their place, and it is not in, on, or around any of the aforementioned foods.

Edible Cookie Dough

Gag. Uncooked cookie dough is only acceptable as tiny little nuggets in ice cream. I don't want my entire cone full of gooey grossness. Cookies are perfect cooked. Let's keep them that way.

Will It Donut?

A bunch of spaghetti baked into the shape of a donut is not a donut. It's spaghetti...in the shape of a donut. Sushi donuts are just sushi...in the shape of a donut. Sushi was doing just fine on its own, thank you very much. In 2017, people have "donutted" mac and cheese, mozzarella sticks, cookies and more. It's all so gimmicky and all so unnecessary.


Don't get me wrong; spiralized vegetables are great. They're fun and flirty and make eating veggies a breeze. What makes my skin crawl is the implications that go along with the word "zoodles." Do not, I repeat, DO NOT attempt to convince me that this zucchini is pasta. Don't treat it like pasta, don't be like, "What a great low-carb way to eat pasta!" That is the fastest way to ruin a perfectly lovely vegetable experience. We are not even remotely finished with these trends.

Avocado Buns

There is such a thing as too much avocado, and this is the definition of it. This is also another case of calling something a "bun" when it is so clearly not. Just call it what it is: an avocado stack.

Cakes That Look Like Other Less Appetizing Foods

Call me crazy, but I don't want to eat a piece of cake that looks like ham. It's just not something I really feel like doing now or ever. Thanks for the opportunity though, 2017!

La Croix

Don't kill me just yet — I LOVE La Croix. I'm all about that fizzy water. The stuff is like a beautiful elixir. So why did it make the "worst trends" list? Because of s*** like that embroidery. It's seltzer, people — not Mother Teresa. The La Croix love has gotten way out of hand, and we just need to bring it back down to Earth. Truth be told, it doesn't even have the best flavors (looking at you, Polar).

Giant Food

There is just no point to this giant bowl of pho. There's this strange trend of making huge versions of things, and it's wasteful and silly. No way anyone could eat all that noodle soup in one sitting, and it'd be very difficult to doggy bag the leftovers. Sure, you could share with friends, but you either have to all eat out of the same giant bowl (ew) or spoon it into regular-sized bowls, which is how it should have been served in the first place. End rant.

Carrot Lattés and Other Strange Coffee Vessels

This is a big ol' NOPE. In 2017, people started serving lattés in hollowed out carrots and avocados. Because nothing is sacred and everything is terrible. Happy New Year, everyone.