There are all kinds of wonderful people on Twitter.
I mean, there are also a bunch of horrible goobers on Twitter, but I prefer to focus on the good things the Internet has to offer us, ya know?
As you scroll through your Twitter feed, you never know exactly what you're going to come across. You may see a hilariously relatable joke about parenthood. You might read a funny thread about a guy's house being broken into by his neighbor's pets. Maybe you'll learn a new mind-blowing fact you can use to impress your friends.
Or, you might come across some gummy bear science. Yes, really. Thanks to Scott Barolo, a science professor at the University of Michigan, Twitter now has its very own viral thread featuring the science of gummy bears. We're truly living in the future, guys.
It all started when Barolo revealed he had a bag that purportedly contained 12 different flavors of gummy bears.
I think we can all agree that 12 is a lot of flavors.
12 flavors? Let’s see what this is all about https://t.co/j5jnBA3JdL— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553911655.0
Like any good scientist, Barolo took some time to make observations about the package.
Take that, freedom haters https://t.co/v823LG9BSf— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553911831.0
Unfortunately, Barolo struggled a bit in opening the package.
I can’t open the bag. Damn you, American craftsmanship— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553911968.0
He started by dumping all the gummy bears out into one pile.
Are there really 12? Let’s get sorting https://t.co/NgZdm63sQ8— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553912108.0
Barolo began by sorting the bears by color. But what's this?
Welp. I can only distinguish 11 colors of gummi bears https://t.co/Da8MJINWH1— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553912528.0
There's only one correct response.
Alexa, compose a strongly worded letter to the Albanese Confectionary Group of Merrillville, Indiana— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553912595.0
Luckily, there was an explanation:
Several sharp-eyed viewers have checked the photo on the packet and pointed out that I have been ROBBED of a purple… https://t.co/s17zLEV1ul— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553914106.0
Here are the flavors the package claimed to contain.
Okay now. The 12 flavors are listed on the packet: https://t.co/nSnjcVLzd6— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553914641.0
Ever the scientist, Barolo formed an initial hypothesis:
Let’s form an initial hypothesis. Here are my guesses from visual cues alone: https://t.co/eRzs3ifUqF— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553915116.0
Barolo then decided to smell each color of gummy bear.
Now let’s factor in SMELL https://t.co/E2tEjswyyF— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553915885.0
Unfortunately, there wasn't a lot of variation in the scent.
Starting at the one o’clock posiition and moving clockwise. The bears I have marked “lemon” smell like... a freakin gummi bear 😠— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553916010.0
Overall, judging by scent proved to be more or less impossible.
Yeah, they all basically smell the same, except the ones I marked “Lime” may be Green Apple. And it’s possible that… https://t.co/osYLmLSNNA— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553916287.0
Barolo also observed how each gummy bear sounded and felt.
TOUCH: they are all gooey and gross. SOUND: they all make a sticky sound when I pull them off the paper. No help there— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553916367.0
Finally, it was time for the most important part of the experiment.
It’s head chompin’ time :D https://t.co/EDK742W24t— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553916594.0
Barolo started with the bears he assumed were blue-raspberry-flavored.
I’ll start with the ones I guessed are Blue Raspberry. I’m not so sure about Raspberry, but I am definitely getting… https://t.co/N0NYNKCxGI— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553916889.0
He then moved on to the cherry gummy bears.
“Cherry” is 100% cherry. “Cherry Ludens Cough Drop” would be more accurate but that wasn’t one of the options https://t.co/nTgMpH0rse— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553916984.0
Strawberry was strawberry!
“Strawberry” could be strawberry. Yes. Yes it’s strawberry. No time for self-doubt now Scott, you only have one bea… https://t.co/qsJnicf59V— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553917522.0
So far, so good. But could the streak continue?
And now we venture into the oranges and yellows. This is where all hell breaks loose https://t.co/WabnfLSn1Y— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553917624.0
Orange was orange!
“Orange” is orange!!! I’m gonna get an A I’m gonna get an A https://t.co/BMlLUaJXz1— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553917955.0
Although Barolo couldn't help but notice that the orange flavor wasn't really very orangey at all.
Really I would call this “Clementine” but I’m at the mercy of the unimaginative flavor namers of the Albanese Confe… https://t.co/iIV8KGn3DS— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553918074.0
Once again, Barolo was correct with pink grapefruit!
“Pink Grapefruit” tastes like either pink grapefruit, or the inside of a mailbox. The winning streak continues https://t.co/QPRADx10DI— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553918805.0
Now things started to get really hairy.
Oh dear. Lemon-Mango-Pineapple, the Bermuda Triangle of ursine fruit flavors. Will I capsize on their rocky shoals?… https://t.co/Nlwdv4DoOL— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553918931.0
Oh no. I blew it. “Pineapple” is clearly lemon. No no no no no https://t.co/PQ0vmRxbEJ— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553919276.0
Barolo was, understandably, a bit miffed.
What the hell, these bears are rigged— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553919298.0
Luckily, Barolo didn't do a three-way mix-up of the yellow bears.
“Mango” is mango. That means “Lemon” must be pineapple. I advance to the next round, bruised but unbroken https://t.co/1iq30vcYqK— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553919715.0
Unfortunately, his failure in the yellow bear category seemed to affect the rest of the experiment.
I’ll be honest, I was so distracted by my humiliation at the hands of the yellow bears that I forgot to pay attenti… https://t.co/cfF09GxYVA— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553920393.0
The watermelon bear?
I mean, what is the point of so-called “gummi bears” anyway. What does that even MEAN. Stupid bears https://t.co/oKPC32pFyH— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553920984.0
Here's the final score:
I expected trouble from the yellow bears, but I never thought I’d get pantsed by the greenies. Final score: 7 corre… https://t.co/KeF1Krp8av— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553921401.0
Barolo also ranked the flavors from best to worst:
Flavors ranked best to worst: Mango 👏👍 Watermelon (Jolly Rancheresque) Strawberry Blue Raspberry Pineapple (I for… https://t.co/09bDLtYPDs— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553921699.0
He even created gummy bear horoscopes!
🔮 Gummiscopes ♈️ ARIES: strawberry ♉️ TAURUS: pineapple ♊️ GEMINI: green apple ♋️ CANCER: pink grapefruit ♌️ LEO:… https://t.co/EpPulufXA4— Scott Barolo (@Scott Barolo)1553922453.0