Unbelievably Offensive Vintage Ads That Would Definitely Be Banned Today

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Marketing is all about your audience, the people who are reading your messages, and who is interested in buying your product. The worst thing you can do in marketing or advertising is to offend your customers or make an ignorant, sexist, or racist comment. That’s a sure fire way to ruin your sales!

But that didn’t seem to stop these companies at all! Whoever was in charge of these ads must have turned a blind eye to the general well-being of their customers. The people behind these ads made some offensive and inappropriate comments about women, children, and men. Pretty much no one was safe from these savage ads.

It was truly a different time back then and apparently, no one cared about being blatantly sexist for a cigarette ad or making demeaning marks about children in an attempt to sell perfume. Buckle up because this is going to be a wild, weirdly offensive ride.

We’ve all seen good ads.

Whether it was during the Super Bowl or scrolling through your Instagram ad, we’ve seen some quality ads.

Like this one.

This Pepsi commercial aired in the 2019 Super Bowl and it was amazing. Cardi B, Steve Carrell, and Lil Jon? It could not get better.

But we’ve also seen some really cringe-worthy ads.

You know those ones that you see that make your eyes roll so far back in your head and you wonder how they even got approved by anyone?

Like this cringey one.

Basically, any “As Seen On TV” ad was the most cringe-worthy thing in the entire world and their products never actually worked. But someone somewhere thought showing this would really draw in new customers!

There’s more good than bad.

Luckily, a lot of ads get it right and make a huge difference in their company’s reputation. It feels like they are getting more creative and are paying more attention to their specific audiences.

But let’s talk about the bad.

Before we got some basic common sense, some ads were so blatantly terrible that it seems shocking to think they were used and people liked them.

Today, this stuff wouldn’t fly.

Some of these ads are so offensive that they would definitely not be allowed to be aired today.

A post-dinner drink.

  via Pinterest  

I don’t know what’s more disturbing, having a child pose with a beer or claiming that everyone is going to sleep better after drinking a beer?

Start them young!

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You might as well put Coke in a baby bottle! This ad says to start them young to avoid them having an awkward phase so they can fit in with their friends. And they made their claim in the name of science!

Some Seven-Up in your sippy cup!

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Look how happy that baby is! I guess parents used to feed their babies soda if they got upset and it was a sure way to calm them down.

Need more celery?

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My colon feels very offended by this ad. It’s pretty invasive.

That’s one way to scare people away.

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This ad is talking about bowling, by the way. Who would have thought?

A man’s world!

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You can’t go wrong with these “power-packed patterns” that will have your women serving you breakfast on your knees.

The creepy enabler.

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If anyone ever looks at you like that while you’re drinking a beer, you run away and don’t look back!

Tonic wine to solve your problems.

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We’ve got one strong review, saying it lifted her “awful depression” after just one bottle!

A sexist simile!

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I can’t even take this one seriously.

Never heard of this diet before…

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This is like today’s equivalent to those weight loss teas. A little ridiculous but apparently a lot of people believe it.

To help with the Christmas list.

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Ahh, yes, at the top of every woman’s Christmas list is a vacuum, and not just any vacuum, a Hoover! Don’t insult women with anything less than a name-brand vacuum cleaner. Also, who dresses like that on Christmas morning?

An easy open lid.

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Finally, they have a bottle that women can open! Thank God, our fragile female hands have never been capable to do it on our own.

Who wears the pants?

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Since she’s in charge of buying and washing the pants, the wife has to keep an eye out for a good deal!

When doctors used to support cigarettes.

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Your health care professional only recommends the best cigarettes, and since they are a doctor, you can totally trust their opinion.

Keeping a woman in her place.

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Which is…on the ground staring at men’s shoes? There’s nothing like laying on the living room floor next to a pair of smelly shoes. What a life.

A family-friendly restaurant.

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At least there’s free parking.

The perfect gift.

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What every bride wants to open at her bridal shower! A meat thermometer so she can cook the perfect meal for her husband.

Looks don’t matter.

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A woman’s worth is not in her hair, eyes, or teeth, but in the way she smells!

Mom just needs a smoke break!

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Look at that poor baby! It deserves a mom who takes frequent smoke breaks, especially right in front of her child.

The perfect wife!

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At least the beer is safe! If she can’t cook, at least she can keep the beer on the table.

A washer and dryer make for a happy, pregnant wife!

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Anyone else jealous of Jean? Seems like she’s got it all figured out thanks to her all-knowing husband.

The cigarette for actors!

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In order to keep their voice clean and stray from that gross, raspy tone, all they have to do is smoke a pack a day!

Another great Christmas present.

  via Pinterest  

Be the envy of every housewife in the neighborhood with this ironing board, courtesy of Santa Claus!

What a shirt!

  via Pinterest  

Be a daring man who spanks women! This shirt will give you that real masculine power that their customers are looking for.

The honest gold digger.

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At least she doesn’t care about money, all she cares about is a smooth face.

The right shape for women.

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I loved being compared to a fruit! Really empowering.

Sexualizing young girls.

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That’s just about the creepiest way to sell a perfume that has ever existed. Also, does that girl look like JonBenĂ©t Ramsay or is it just me?

Are you officially offended?

Hopefully, you were able to laugh at how absolutely ridiculous some of these ads were. Thank heavens they are not allowed to be seen today.

We’re thankful these aren’t real ads anymore.

But that won’t stop us from sharing all these offensive ads with our friends. Go ahead and share this article with your friends to get a good laugh!