Many current and popular children's toys have been around the block a few times and withstood some major fender benders only to continue cruising toward success. Classic toys like Barbies, Twister, Legos, Cabbage Patch Kids, Furbies, and Mr. Potato Head, were, for many of us, hallmarks of childhood. Now that we aren't kids anymore, we can look back and realize that even our toys had a lot of growing up to do.
Here are 10 unsettling facts about 6 classic toys that have all done the walk of shame once or twice in the past. But we forgive them.
When it comes to toys, no Barbie's perfect.
1) Barbie and Ken are related.Turns out Barbie and Ken were named after siblings. According to Thought Co:
The Barbie doll was invented in 1959 by Ruth Handler, the co-founder of Mattel, whose own daughter was named Barbara... The Ken doll was named after Ruth's son and was introduced two years after Barbie in 1961.Oops. No one told me. I already felt like a big enough perv for certain acts the two engaged in under my watch when I thought they were just boyfriend and girlfriend. Now to find out they're related, I might need therapy... I mean more therapy. Don't worry. I'm already in therapy.
2) Barbie's "perfect figure" is out of this world.To say that Barbie's figure sets unrealistic expectations for women is beyond an understatement. According to a study performed by Rehabs.com, Barbie's supposedly perfect figure would prevent her from walking upright or menstruating. She'd only have the room for half a liver and a few inches of intestine.
3) Twister is twisted.Good news, if you've got kids, you may quite possibly unknowingly already own sex in a box. Okay, that just sounds wrong, but that's exactly what critics called the game when it debuted in 1966, according to MetalFloss.com.
4) And the critics aren't the only ones with dirty minds.
Mom who let daughter, 16, and friends play naked Twister escapes jail�� https://t.co/04RmmnOGQX via @MailOnline— robertlewis378@gmail (@robertlewis378@gmail)1468339432.0
The woman confessed to having sex with an 18-year-old male at the party and afterward used sex toys to pleasure herself in front of the teens because she was “still horny," police said.Yikes. Suddenly, I don't feel so weird about the whole Barbie and Ken thing.
5) Legos are a bunch of frauds.We already knew they were evil. Any mom whose stepped on those little bastards fourteen-thousand times knows they are weapons. What we didn't know is that they are also thieves. But it doesn't surprise us. Turns out a small shop named Kiddicraft in Germany created and had even patented the interlocking and then wooden toys, but as soon as Lego laid eyes on the idea, suddenly they were called Legos and the rest is history. Kiddicraft was never to be heard from again. Upon learning this news, I may have to issue a ban on all Lego products in my household. Sorry kids, but it's just not right!
6) And they're more than just a pain in the ass.Karl Smallwood of Today I Found Out (via Yahoo) wanted to find out exactly what it is about Legos that makes them painful plastic landmines for parents. He concluded that the combination of a highly sensitive body part with many nerve endings versus a plastic square designed to be highly durable results in a recipe for pain. New York University physics professor Tycho Sleator tells Quartz Media that "The sharp corners also exacerbate the pain." Yeah, no kidding, Professor.
7) Cabbage Patch dolls are just as fake.Again, we knew something was off with them but couldn't put our finger on it. Now we know that their creator, Georgia businessman Xavier Roberts, was just as fake as his dollies. According to TopTenz.com, a woman named Martha Nelson Thomas originally created the dolls and even came up with the whole adoption bit, too. Good thing Martha took the creep to court and won a settlement in the late 1980's.
8) They're not only creepy thieves; They eat children.Cabbage Patch Dolls released their "Snacktime Kid" in 1996 and just as the commercial says, "she really loves to snack." What the ad fails to mention is that she really loves to snack... on your kids. Apparently, Cabbage Patch designed the snacking doll's jaws so that they didn't stop snacking until her mouth was completely emptied.
The doll was basically the spawn that would descend if Chucky's Bride and Jaws had a one-nighter.After about 100 reports of kids getting their hair and fingers caught in the doll's mouth, Mattel decided to shovel out $40 reimbursements to those with proof of purchase of the doll and immediately pulled it off shelves.
Parents [were] calling in distress, screaming that wild and uncontrolled Snacktime Kids were consuming their daughters’ hair. Because the mouths would not “spit out" food, at least one parent had to cut her child’s hair out of the mouths of the trichophagic doll and remove the batteries as to not cause any more damage.Sounds like a great time, Mattel.
And when you think she's through... just look inside her backpack and like magic... the snacks keep coming back!If "magic" is Mattel's P.C. child-friendly term for a colostomy bag, then yeah, that's magic alright.