Ah, weddings. If you're in your 30s, you've probably been to your fair share of good ones and awful ones. Luckily, I'm in my 20s, so I'm still that age where my mom gives me that look of "why isn't that you up there getting married" and not flat out saying it.
But good or bad, at least the single people out there have never had to worry about having that one special day ruined by something insane happening. Like a wedding objection. Before we get started, why do people still ask if there are any objections? It seems like that's just tempting fate.
And the people in this article did indeed tempt fate. We found the best Wedding Objection" stories on Reddit and compiled them all for you. So sit back, pop in your DVD of 27 Dresses, queue up your best wedding DJ playlist and check out these horrible stories of forgotten loves, pissed parents, and weddings gone wrong.
People are always trying to break up weddings. Like this first story!
An ex telling the bride he still loved her. Super super awkward. He got kicked out, and the wedding continued, but it was pretty messed up and put a real damper on the day. They became friends again a while after they broke up. So far as anyone knew, his feelings for her were just platonic then, because he actually broke up with her.-CompetitiveIce8
When it's your family that speaks up...At my cousin’s wedding when the exchanging of vows took place, my aunt shouted “Wasn’t there supposed to be a part where you could object?" or something along those lines. -leshiye
This one involves pirates?
A member of my wife's family had a pirate themed wedding. A rival pirate appeared and objected to the wedding. The groom dueled him with rapiers and won.-Mister_E_Phister
The poor timing with this one.
The groom himself. He just stood up there and started crying and, in front of everyone, told the bride that he'd fallen out of love with her a while before but he didn't know how to break it off. It was extremely uncomfortable, they both stepped out, and ten minutes later came back out and got married, because she'd apparently told him she was pregnant. They're still together, with three kids, and I'm not sure about the husband but I can confirm that the wife is having an affair. Neither of them is happy, but she has a comfortable life and he doesn't have the spine to leave.-naked_nun_run
Sometimes you just invite the wrong people.
Nobody had said "speak now", but the groom's ex still decided to get up and scream that he was her soulmate, that she forgave him for "this whole thing", and that they should leave now because he'd proven his point. By breaking up with her, five years earlier, falling in love, and holding a wedding.
I ate so much cake and got so drunk at that wedding. Meanwhile, everyone else was screaming and throwing shit. Good times. The bride was my boyfriend's ex. No idea why they invited us.-HammeredHeretic
Or sometimes it's your bro that wants to be standing next to you.
This happened very recently, but in a different manner than the other stories.
For years, Groom and Best Man are super close, room together, and the running joke is that they’re more than friends. Later on, Groom meets Bride, falls in love, and proposes. The new running joke is that Best Man is very disappointed that the Groom is marrying someone else. At the wedding, officiant asks if anyone has objections. Best Man objects. Officiant quickly overrules the objection. It was planned, and Bride thought it was a funny way to acknowledge the super close friendship between Groom and Best Man.
Did not result in anyone being kicked out or awkwardness. Fun and surprisingly appropriate.-rburke319
Or maybe don't put the spotlight on you on someone else's wedding.
One of my friends interrupted his cousin’s wedding to come out of the closet. He couldn’t understand why people were so pissed at him.
This was the second time my friend had come out to his family. The first time was when he was a teenager (about 8 years earlier) and 90% of his family that was attending said the wedding was already aware.-Parkstreet2north
When someone shows up uninvited.
The father of the bride had been pretty absentee after her parents' divorce. He had re-married and gotten into the Christian Science religion and they were both pretty terrible. The new wife was not invited to my friends' wedding but the father came and it seemed like he was there to be supportive. He stood up during vows and proclaimed my friend was 'a bitch just like her mother' and the groom ' should get out while he can because my friend was a soul-leeching succubus'.
Not the worst wedding I ever went to.-taradactyl819
What do you mean not the worst? Story time!
I'm 30 and I'm starting to think I may be bad luck because I've been to a few disasters when most people can't name one. The highlights would be... The ceremony being interrupted because the woman the groom was seeing on the side appeared with their baby. Yes, their secret love baby and the groom explaining that polygamy is natural and we should be more open-minded.
The guy goes on to explain the other "disaster" weddings.The bride, my former college roommate, insisting on driving herself to the wedding and getting a DUI en route. Then making an ill attempt at seducing the officer to get out of it, being turned down and subsequently slapping the officer and getting arrested for assault.
He once went to a wedding where the whole wedding forgot to show up.Wedding for a coworker on one of those sunset cruises- engine fails and starts a small fire and everyone had to evacuate the boat. Plus one to a wedding- the couple were completely scammed by their wedding planner. The venue wasn't actually booked, no caterer, no cake, no DJ no nothing. She scammed them out of thousands. 250 guests milling about in a town center parking lot. They, of course, reported her but I don't think they were ever able to recover much of their money. -taradactyl819
It's always awkward when there's drama at a co-worker's wedding.Went to a co-workers wedding and the maid of honor objected and admitted to being the other woman and that the groom had been cheating with her for months. The bride left in tears and the groom immediately tried to get with the MoH, but she told him she wasn't gonna hurt the bride further and that he needs to eff off. The bride is doing much better and is now a manager here, and I haven't heard from the groom in over a year. The MoH and bride are on speaking terms, but I don't think their relationship is gonna ever be what it used to be. -saffronar
Of course, a bunch of these just involve drunk people.
I saw it nearly happen at my uncles wedding a friend of theirs got too drunk, and when say said speak now he smiled, started to stand-up. My mother grabbed him by his hair and sat him back down by force.
The drunk was a close friend of both the bride and groom so he was seated up front. He’s a nice dude but sometimes a bit of a dumbass It was a small non-traditional wedding. They were wed in the botanical gardens by a justice of the peace. The reception was held in the same place. When you entered the area for the wedding /reception there was an open bar so some people helped themselves before the ceremony started. And one overindulged a bit.-Killj0y13
Sometimes a little weather can be romantic! Ask Hugh Grant!I was at an outdoor ceremony once, with a storm coming in. The pastor was trying to move things along so that we wouldn't get caught in the rain (the reception was indoors). He asked if anyone knows of any objection, and instantly, there was a loud clap of thunder. To his credit, the pastor just paused a moment and then said: "Anyone else? Alright, in that case..." and finished the ceremony. The couple is still together, and happily afaik (I was the +1, so I'm not super close to them). So take that, passive-aggressive supernatural objector! -yshavit
This wedding is legit insane. From beginning to end.When I was 13 we went to my 2nd cousin's wedding. Everything is going great... They even got past the speak now or forever hold your peace part. They wrote their own vows but before my 2nd cousin's fiancé/wife could even begin her vows his son got up announced to the entire room that she was cheating on his dad with her drug dealer and he couldn't let his dad marry her. My 2nd cousin yelled at his son to either sit down or leave. The son left, my 2nd cousin married her anyways, and 5 years and one baby later he finds out it was true and they separated but were too tweaked out to be able to afford a divorce. Finally, he got married a third time but before he could get married his third now ex-wife had to pay for their divorce. This wedding had no objections. They moved to Missouri and this time instead of separating or asking for a divorce he decided he didn't want to be married anymore and just moved back to Cali... To get back together with his second ex-wife. Yepp family dinners are a little awkward. -ShelbiDoll91
Cows getting married? Mazel tov!
It was at my wedding that we had at my grandmother's house who lives out in the country next to a cattle farm. The cows didn’t make a peep till that moments and one finally went "moo."
We all laughed and continued but it was a funny moment about my wedding.-sylvester49
Another case of terrible timing. And a hint of something a little worse...
About 5 years ago, a co-worker of mine invited all of us to his wedding. He was a great guy but none of us had ever met his wife. Seen pictures of her and he always said nothing but good things of her.
Fast forward to the wedding, it was an incredibly nice one, looks like they paid quite a bit for it. Everything was going smooth and I was having fun and assume so was everyone else. Anyway, now they're both at the alter or whatever looking deeply into each others' eyes and smiling and when that line comes of " speak now or forever hold your peace" I get anxious but nothing EVER happens. So right as soon as the anxiousness faded away, THE BRIDES MOTHER STOOD UP AND OBJECTED.
So why did she object?? I'll give you a hint...Blurted some shit about how she doesn’t want to continue their family with a man like him ( he was black she was white). The bride to be cried ran off. The wedding went fucking silent. Brides dad took the mom and ran after the bride. The groom stood there incredibly awkward. He may or may not have achieved actually leaving his body. Anyway, the groomsmen took him away. I left because it was too weird. Apparently, the reception went on. They did not get married that day. But ended up together anyway privately, and surprisingly work wasn't weird. He laughed about it. And they are happily married. For what it’s worth, the MIL never truly stated it was because he was black. But this guy was incredibly nice, selfless, and just someone who you completely felt comfortable around. Never judged anyone either and well spoken. The MIL also never showed signs of hating him. Who knows why it happened. Maybe the bride and groom found out. I'm not sure. I since moved and haven’t spoken to them. But man does that memory last. -ibi1kinibi
This one's kinda cute.
A wedding I was at, one guy got up and pledged his undying love for the bride, followed by four or five others objecting for various reasons including one guy's love for the groom. By the second or third objection, though, it was clear that the whole thing was a clever ruse. I found out later that it was all set up by the bride as a prank on the unsuspecting groom and family and friends. It was pretty hilarious!-stevo_james
When the wedding gets just a smidge violent. Just a smidge.
My wife dragged me to a wedding that I did NOT want to be at years ago but I'm forever grateful that she did because I was able to witness one of the greatest spectacles of human drama that has ever taken place. This was like an episode of Jerry Springer mixed with Cops. Bride's LOVER spoke up at that moment and yelled, "I'll be god-damned if I'm gonna keep my mouth shut and let you steal my woman, you sorry piece of shit!" This deranged old redneck proceeds to come at the groom WITH A PISTOL threatening to shoot him if he doesn't give her up. It wasn't a huge wedding, maybe 40 or so people but every single one of them went screaming and running and maybe 2 people stayed and called the cops. I grabbed my wife's hand and we retreated outside to watch the rest of the scene unfold from the church window.-jjett89
That moment when you can't decide if you just want to hide or get on with the wedding.
Grooms dad interrupted the wedding to ask the bride’s father whether or not she was truly a virgin. Then he went on about how he didn’t know anything about the wedding and blah blah blah. Truly weird and embarrassing. I was there with an ex-boyfriend.-chickenbiscuit26
Stop trying to ruin people's weddings! I'm looking at you, Dustin Hoffman types.
The best man at my step sisters wedding did this. It happened at the rehearsal the night before. It was a very large wedding and the rehearsal was bigger than a lot of weddings. The minister was going over the vows quickly while giving instruction on what to do. When he said something about objections the best man interrupted saying he had to put a stop to this. He was in love with the bride and was sure she felt the same way. My sister and everyone else was horrified. It caused plenty of chaos and confusion. As far as I know, after that, neither the bride nor groom ever spoke to him again.-chadspdx
That time when a bunch of actors got married.
A friend of the couple's in cosplay armor (think Master Chief,) ran in, asked the date, said "Then I'm not too late!" pointed a big, fake spacey rifle at the bride and said "Mother of the Xenocide, the fruit of thy womb will never destroy my planet! Die, Rachel!"
And the groom went "Her name is Amy."
"This is the 24th?"
"Oh, no. You want McKinley Beach"
"Oh... My bad. Have a nice day."
Theatre majors, man. I do not even.-spiderqueendemon
Sometimes kids just want to have a little fun.
I went to a wedding when I was 5, it was between my Older Brother and his fiancée. Anyways, they said the whole "speak now" spiel and right before he was done little 5 year old me said "I OBJECT!" And everyone turned to me. I was dead silent because I didn't know what would happen. My dad asked me "Well, why do you object?" And I said "I did not know what would happen if I did" and I was promptly seated.-Camero32
How about an unwanted spectator?At my own wedding. But not in the traditional way. We were getting married along a river at the end of summer and tons of wake boarders and boats were out. I was a ball of nerves and the ceremony felt so serious... when all of a sudden some dude on a boat blasting music screamed “Don’t do it bro!!" And sped off. It was actually hilarious and made the rest of the ceremony a lot more fun. My husband and I cracked up even though his brothers looked like they were about to jump in the river after the guy! -Coopamonster
This is what happens when you have an open bar before the wedding.
I was working at a wedding when I was younger. I was running the bar at the reception, which was very close to the hall the weddings were at. We were told that the reception would begin around 4pm. It was already about 3ish and I was packing fridges, the usual bar man things, while one of the male guests was still sitting there drinking.
I asked if he was not joining the reception, to which he replied something along the lines of “when I have the courage".
He downs his drink and leaves. 10 minutes later he’s back, looking extremely disappointed. Guy orders a drink, and less than 30 seconds later another guy who’s dressed extremely well (turned out to be the groom), walks in, punches him in the back of the head, and leaves.
This dude just picked his drink up and sipped it further.
I eventually found out that this dude, had downed his drink, walked into the receptions down admitted to sleeping with the wife on her hen night, and again the night before the wedding. He was never invited to the wedding, he just felt the groom needed to know. So he found out where the wedding was, suited up and dropped the info mid-ceremony.-STUNSLAVE
And now I present to you, the ultimate insane wedding, in four parts. Starting with Part 1.
No objections were made (unfortunately) but back when I worked in a hotel a few years ago I got to witness a very interesting wedding. In preparation, we had to ensure we’d ordered enough Blue WKD in as this was the groom’s drink of choice (first red flag). The whole wedding took place in the hotel, the function room also hosted the ceremony so we started pretty early that day. Before the ceremony, the bride had taken 3 bottles of Prosecco up to her room whilst she was getting ready and was clearly tipsy before the wedding started but seemed to act sober enough that whoever was conducting the ceremony was none the wiser.
The ceremony seemed normal but I was prepping the bar so wouldn’t have known either way. As it ends all of the guests fled out for drinks whilst we changed the function room and set out the tables for the sit-down meal. The guests were trashy AF to put it politely, I already knew one of them as he’d been to the hotel before, acting like a total wanker when I told him the bar was closed and I wouldn’t be serving him - however he was being especially polite to me this time as it was clear his date for the wedding was definitely not the same girl he was in with just a few weeks ago (who I suspect was a paid acquaintance). Before the meal even began we were starting to worry if we’d have enough alcohol, these people drank like fish but we manage to get them all seated and fed and everyone is being friendly and well behaved.
It continues (obviously).As the night goes on the bride is slowly becoming so drunk she can barely stand and has changed from her wedding dress into a very scant pink neglige with a tutu skirt, she’s also given up on using the bathroom so she loudly announces she will be relying solely upon nature wees from this point onwards. Before midnight we are nearly totally out of spirits - the guests are ordering shots every round (I’d tried to deny service but my manager was having none of it and as the hotel was struggling they wanted to make as much money as possible) and have shotted us out of almost everything (Blue WKDS are long gone but the groom has a lovely blue smile at this point). After the bride finally gives up trying to shot disgusting liquors that have likely been there since the hotel was built they head to the dance floor. The party starts winding down and it’s time for the last dance but the bride decides she’d prefer to have this with a male wedding guest which really fucks off the groom, she then loudly announces she’ll be throwing an after party in their suite and everyone is invited in the hot tub - funnily enough the groom isn’t thrilled and kicks off. Another member of staff manages to calm everyone down and convinces the DJ to play the last dance song once more before he leaves and the groom agrees.
Gotta keep the bride happy...
Everyone starts packing up and the bride comes back from her room in her third outfit of the night, a nice grey stained tracksuit. She’s adamant she wants another cigarette before bed (god knows how many packs she went through that day - especially sad considering the money for the wedding came from her parent’s inheritance who both died of cancer). She can’t find a lighter and becomes irate, screaming at the groom for one. The groom claims he doesn’t have one but not taking no for an answer she rifles through his pockets and finds one.
Holding it aloft she screams at him that he’s a liar and slaps him clean across the face, the groom obviously not having enjoyed this returns the favor and punches her in the face. The best man spots this and leaps across a sofa and tackles the groom to the floor, they’re now having a full-on fist fight whilst the bride sobs incoherently. I try and get out of the way as I’m being trampled by Mr. WKD and his scummy friend. My supervisor storms in saying he found coke in the bathroom and the police are on their way - the best man is off like a robbers dog and the groom stands there stunned and then follows his new wife into the function room. We then hear screaming and shouting from that room and the bride has picked up a chair and launched it at her husband and was now holding a second one trying to attack him with it.
When a wedding ends with an ambulance, it's never a good thing.
At this point, it’s about 2 am, and I am royally done with the day, my mum is waiting for me outside so I grab my bag and head off giving my supervisor strict instructions to tell me exactly how this ends when I’m back for my next shift. I pass a riot van of police officers on the way out of the door, direct them to the drama and go home.
Next shift I’m informed that an ambulance arrived shortly after the police, the groom was taken to the hospital after sustaining a head injury but he did a runner from the paramedics when he got to the hospital, the bride stayed at the hotel and to console herself spent the night with the male wedding guest she danced with, they left together in the morning and a week later announced on Facebook she was in a new relationship with him.-CorkleSchmorkle